Witness Protection
by valathe
Summary: Modern AU: Elsa is a detective with the NYPD, hunting a deranged serial killer with her partner Kristoff. She crosses paths with Anna when her roommate is seemingly abducted by the maniac. Will Elsa find them in time to prevent another murder? How will she respond to her feelings for the quirky redhead? Rated M for smut, language and very graphic depictions of violence and rape
1. New Clues

Elsa groaned as she rubbed her temples. The headache had set in about an hour ago and stubbornly refused to leave. That she had been staring into a computer monitor for several hours and still continued to do so probably didn't help. That she was incredibly frustrated with not making any progress made the dull throbbing only worse.

Kristoff, her partner, was sitting at his own desk in their small office, apparently suffering through the same condition. Elsa startled when he suddenly slammed his fist down.

„This leads to nothing!" he growled. „We've gone over all of this like a million times in the past two months alone. I'm gonna get some coffee. You want some too?"

Elsa rolled her eyes, because her answer to that question had always been, without fail, a 'Yes!', but smiled nonetheless. „I do, pretty boy. You know how I like it?"

Kristoff smiled back. „Black, with milk, no sugar."

„Atta boy" she purred, grinning as he shut the door behind him. It was this routine, their small inside jokes, knowing when to give the other person space, that helped her keep her sanity in her job. When he returned with her coffee (black, no milk, tons of sugar) he plopped down in his seat again, sighing deeply. She put the cup to her lips and moaned with delight when liquid 'awake' filled her mouth.

„You need it that bad, huh?" Kristoff said with a sheepish grin. Elsa blushed and was about to belt him with every single pen lying on her desk, when someone knocked and poked their head through their door.

„Hey lovebirds, I got something for you" said the head with hair black as coal and a mustache with handlebars that would make Hulk Hogan jealous.

"Hey Neil, what's up?" Elsa asked casually.

"Oh, nothing," Neil replied, "only the big breakthrough you've waited for. A witness!"

They both immediately jumped out of their seats and made to follow him. Out of reflex, Elsa grabbed the badge lying on her desk, even though she didn't need it. While they walked through the busy corridors of the precinct, Elsa took her time to study the badge intently, like she did at least once a weak. It kept her grounded. She smiled at all the intricate little details that didn't quite fit on the piece of metal and made it look unintentionally funny.

Liberty and Justice holding the shield, with the eagle perched on top, slightly spreading its wings. 'CITY OF NEW YORK POLICE' ran above in a semicircle, 'DETECTIVE' underneath in straight lettering. She absent-mindedly let her fingers run over her badge number, 3141. She liked to think how much good she had done with that badge. How much scum she had gotten off the street. How many crimes she had solved with her meticulous work. It helped her stay motivated when she hit a wall, just as she had done with her current case. But maybe that wall was about to be smashed in by a real-life witness. Hopefully.

"Hello, earth to Elsa, anybody in there?" Kristoff said, waving his hand in front of her eyes.

"Uh, yeah, what?" she answered, flustered.

"We're here" he replied, pointing to an interrogation room. "A girl's inside, came in to report her roommate as missing. You wanna go in, or should I?"

Elsa contemplated for a bit. "I'll do it. She'll likely be more at ease around another woman."

Kristoff nodded and gestured towards the door. Neil stood next to them, looking quite satisfied to have provided the big lead.

She knocked and entered the room. Inside, a red-haired girl sat at the desk, bleary-eyed and slumped in her chair. She was fiddling around with a water bottle, trying to keep her hands busy, and, likely, her mind occupied. When she heard the door open she looked up, uncertainty plain in her features.

Elsa donned a small smile and confidently strode into the room, closing the door and sitting down on the opposite side of the desk.

"Hi, I'm detective McKay, Elsa McKay." she said, extending her hand.

The girl tentatively reached for the hand and gave it a slight squeeze before worrying over the water bottle again.

"Anna", she said with a barely-there accent that Elsa had trouble recognizing. "Anna Keller."

Elsa arched an eyebrow at her last name. "My mother's maiden name was Keller. You don't happen to be from Wisconsin?"

"No", the girl said, still unsure about what was going on. "I'm originally from Texas, but I've lived in New York since I was six."

Now it clicked. A hint of the southern drawl was still present in her speech.

"What's going on? Why am I being interrogated here?"

Elsa looked apologetically and got up again. "I'm sorry that my colleague put you in here, it's standard procedure. If you'd like to we can go to my office. It's much nicer. And much messier, come to think of it."

That elicited a small smile from the girl. "Yeah, I'd prefer that."

"Well then, follow me", Elsa replied with a smile, knocking on the door twice. It was opened by Kristoff. Neil had left. Her partner shot her a questioning look, and Elsa whispered "We're heading for the office. Nicer atmosphere. Don't disturb us for a while." He nodded and began walking off, likely to the break room and then to the kennels, to share a sandwich or two with that K9 of his. It was really sweet, but so incredibly disgusting at the same time.

Anna followed her timidly, and quietly sat down on the indicated chair opposite of Elsa's.

"Now Anna, I hope it's okay if I call you that?" The girl quickly nodded, and Elsa continued. "Okay, Anna, I still have to record your statement. Are you okay with that?"

"Uh, yeah. I guess." She still looked incredibly lost.

"Don't worry, you'll get a transcript that we'll both sign, so you know there's no foul play involved." Elsa said with a wink. Anna seemed to lighten up a bit.

"Okay, first I'd like you to state your name, age and place of residence."

The girl hesitated for a bit, before saying "Anna Keller, 24 years, 91 Astoria Boulevard, Door 3, New York City."

"Very good. Right! Let's get started. This is detective Elsa McKay, NYPD 3141, with the witness report of the aforementioned Anna Keller concerning a missing person. So, you want to report your roommate as missing, is that correct?"

Anna nodded, and quickly added "Y-yes.", when Elsa smiled and pointed to the small microphone sitting in front of her.

"What is your roommate's name, and when did they go missing?"

"Um, Nicole Summers, and she left our apartment yesterday morning. That's the last I've heard of her. It's not unusual for her to vanish for a day or two, but she always replies to texts or calls, and I've heard nothing from her since yesterday. I went out asking our mutual friends, but they haven't heard anything from her, either. So when she still wasn't home today at noon I became worried, and decided to come here." She shrunk back in her chair, appearing even smaller.

Elsa sent her a reassuring smile. "That was the right thing to do, Anna. She's probably just sleeping off a hangover and her phone ran out of battery, but it never hurts to be cautious. Now, was there anything out of the ordinary when she left yesterday morning?"

Anna fidgeted in her seat. "Well, the night before she brought a boy with her. I wasn't supposed to be home because I had planned to go out with a few friends, but I didn't feel well so I stayed home and watched Netflix. I mean, that's no biggie and I went back to my room because I didn't want to disturb them, but apparently the guy was very upset that they weren't alone. I heard them arguing in her room and then he stormed out. She was really pissed that I had scared off her date, but we made up with some hot chocolate." She smiled at that. "Anyway, yesterday morning she realized that the guy had forgotten his wallet and she said she would just go over to his place and return it real quick, it wasn't that far away from our apartment. Somewhere on 30th Avenue. I don't know where exactly. And after that, nothing. She'll be alright, won't she?"`Worry and concern were obvious in her voice.

Elsa smiled again. "I'm sure she's fine, and now that I'm on it she'll be home in no time, you'll see."

After a sip from her now cold coffee, she continued. "Now, do you remember anything about the man she brought home? His name, how he looked, what he wore?"

Anna thought back. "His name was Michael, I didn't catch his last name. He was pretty average, aside from the ridiculous beard he had. It was really bushy and not very well kempt, I'm surprised she even brought him home, she's usually very conscious of those things."

"Okay. Was there anything unusual about him? Was he overly aggressive, or nervous?"

"Well, yeah he was pretty upset that I was there, which I found a bit weird. Oh, and his eyes!"

Elsa furrowed her brows. "His eyes?"

Anna shuddered at the memory. "Yeah, he had really piercing eyes. A deep gray, it was almost unnatural. Gave me the creeps. Other than that, I'm afraid I don't remember much. As I said, I quickly retreated to my room to give them some space. I only heard bits of the argument, and how the door slammed when he stormed off."

"Anything specific on what they were arguing about?"

Anna thought back, frowning. "No, sorry. I could only hear that he was clearly angry."

"That's okay, Anna." Elsa said, smiling again. "Now, is there anything else you can think of? Any small detail that might seem unimportant to you? It could help us a great deal."

Anna thought very hard, frowning again. "Well, now that you mentioned it, he had his right hand in his pocket, like all the time. He seemed to be playing around with something. I figured it was his phone or his keys maybe, so I didn't pay it much mind. Other than that...no, nothing. Sorry." She looked exhausted.

"It's alright, Anna. You did great. Now I'll call Steven, our sketch artist, and he'll draw the man your roommate was with, so we know what we're looking for. Do you happen to have a photo of Nicole with you?"

Anna nodded and moved to retrieve it from her purse.

"She's a very pretty girl" Elsa said, watching the bright blonde hair and the deep blue eyes. Anna nodded, blushing slightly.

"I had a little bit of a crush on her when we first met in college, but now we're best friends. You have to find her. Please!"

Elsa smiled again, wondering how dumb her constant smiling must look. "Don't worry. She'll be back in no time, and tell you a crazy story over some hot chocolate."

Anna giggled, lightening up a bit.

Elsa picked up her phone and quick-dialed a number. "Steven? Yeah, it's Elsa. I'm in need of your divine gift. No, I'll bring her down. Be there in five."

Anna smirked at the exchange.

"His ego needs a little stroking every now and then", Elsa said with a wink. "Now, I'll bring you down to Steven, and while you two are busy I'll type this out and come find you when you're done, so we can both sign it, okay?"

Anna nodded, obviously relieved that it was over. Elsa reached into her desk and withdrew a card that had her name and number on it.

"Here, I'm giving you my number. If you think of anything else that might help us, no matter how small or insignificant, please don't hesitate to call. Even if it's 3 AM."

Anna took the card and gingerly placed it in her purse, as if it was some great treasure that needed special safekeeping. Elsa escorted her down to Steven who warmly welcomed her and immediately set out to work. Half an hour later, Elsa had printed out the transcript and headed down again. She looked through the large window separating Steve's office from the large space where the beat cops had their desks. They were still at work. Another thirty minutes later, and Anna finally walked out of the office, completely drained. Elsa smiled and approached her.

"Hey Anna. I hope Steven wasn't too much of a diva?"

Anna smiled weakly, and shook her head. "No, he was really sweet. And boy, can he draw!"

Elsa laughed at that. "That's why he's so good at his job. Now, I have the transcript here, we just need to sign both copies, okay?" She laid a hand on Anna's back to gently nudge her towards a desk, but took it away when she felt the girl stiffen beneath her touch. Anna blushed and picked up her pace, almost bumping into the furniture. Elsa had to stifle a giggle.

"Alright, read it through carefully. If there's a part you're not okay with we can go back and look it over."

Anna did as she was told, and after about ten minutes of reading her copy and confirming that both sheets were identical, she signed them on the 'Witness'-line. Elsa grabbed a pen and signed for 'Officer in charge'.

"Okay, done and done. Now you should head home and get some sleep. Will you be alright? My shift is over, I can drive you home if you want." Elsa smacked herself internally. _'What the fuck? Why did I just say that?'_

To her relief, Anna declined her offer. "No, it's quite alright. I'll catch a cab."

"Are you sure?" Another mental smack.

"Yeah. You already did enough for me today, Elsa, umm, I mean McKay I mean Officer Elsa...I'll stop talking now." She blushed furiously.

Elsa giggled. "Don't worry about it. And don't forget, call me if you suddenly remember something else. Good bye."

Anna gave a small wave and left the precinct.

Elsa looked after her retreating form, and when Anna was out the doors, she entered Steven's office.

"So that's our man." she said, studying the drawing.

"Looks like it." Steven replied. "Think this will help you guys along?"

Elsa sighed. "I hope so. You don't see a face like that every day."

* * *

Kristoff stared at the picture hanging at the bulletin board in their office. "Now that's something you don't see every day. One ugly motherfucker. Wonder how he gets all those girls to take him home."

Elsa laughed. "Well, you manage to pick up a girl every now and then, and look at you."

If looks could kill, Kristoff would have been charged with second-degree homicide.

"Well, you don't make it easy, making all the cute girls bat for the other team."

Elsa blushed. "Can't help it if the competition is so weak."

A knock interrupted them, and again it was Neil's head sticking through the door.

"Hey lovebirds, now did I promise anything less?" If smugness had gravity he'd be halfway to China right now.

"Yes, Neil, thanks a ton. You're a real life saver." Elsa said, surprisingly without any hint of sarcasm. "Well, it's 8 PM now, and my head feels like a beehive. The pictures and descriptions have been distributed to the officers on patrol tonight? Good, I'm gonna head home, and nail this mofo's ass tomorrow."

Neil took that as his cue to open the door fully. "Listen, Elsa, maybe you'd like to get a beer or dinner sometime?"

Elsa rolled her eyes. "Neil, for the nth time. I'm gay, and you can't un-gay me. I'd love to grab a beer or two with you some time after hours, but you need to get this date-thing out of your head. Okay? And definitely not today, I just wanna go home and pass out."

Neil kept his smile, but it was a grimace now. "Alright Elsa, just a beer, some time this week. Alright?"

Despite everything, Elsa managed a smile. "Yeah, Neil. Just a drink between colleagues. I'd like that."

And with that, Neil was gone again.

Kristoff looked at her amused. "What was that, like the twelfth time he's asked you out?"

Elsa rubbed her temples again. "I stopped counting after five. I hope he's finally taken the hint."

"Well, now that he's out, wanna grab a beer?"

Elsa smiled, but shook her head. "Nah, I meant it when I said I want to pass out. But thanks anyway. Tomorrow."

"I gotcha. Anyway, see you tomorrow, feisty pants, bright and early."

Elsa scoffed. "The words 'bright' and 'early' together in a sentence don't exist in my universe."

Kristoff laughed. "Night, Els."

"Night, Kris." she replied while turning off the light in their office.

* * *

"What's so funny?" the girl yelled over the booming music.

"Nothing." Elsa said, "Just had to think about something from work."

She looked at the woman, lust filling her eyes. "Why don't we go somewhere more..._quiet_?"

The girl nodded, taking her hand. "My apartment is just around the corner."

They burst through her door, lips locked. Miraculously they made it to the bedroom without breaking the kiss or stumbling to the ground. Clothes were coming off at a frantic speed, and soon enough Elsa was writhing and moaning beneath the touch of a woman she had met thirty minutes earlier. As she neared her peak, on thought crossed her mind. _'I'm gonna pass out alright.'_

* * *

**hey guys, another fic *yay***

**thought you' get some smut on day one, didn't you? no such luck, pervs. gotta wait a while for that :P**

**once again i repeat the warnings from th descripion: there will be 'very' graphic depictions of violence. i'm talking mutilated bodies graphic. also some (maybe) sexy femslash (depending how my smut works out). if that's not your cup of tea you should stop reading.**

**as with all my fics, any suggestions and/or criticism is _very welcome and encouraged, _be it through PMs, reviews, or letters wrapped around a stone and thrown through my window_._ i'm not above rewriting stuff if you feel i should. aso, you're welcome to guss where i got the names for elsa's parents.**

**apologies in advance if i fuck some things up, i'm not overly familiar with U.S. laws or police (trying to do my research, though). once again, don't hesitate tocall me out on my bulshit. if it's not important to the plot i'll change it.**

**anyway, revies are appreciated.**

**08/22/15: changed a sentence to make the plot run along smoothly. whoever spots it gets one million fake internet points ;)  
09/26/15: the story now features an amazing cover image, made by the insanely talented jungie14295. the link to the picture and her DeviantArt is on my profile page. check out her gorgeous pieces :)  
**

**_peace out_**


	2. House call, pt I

Elsa woke when an errant sunbeam hit her eye. She groaned, attempting to will the sun to move a little bit faster so she could continue sleeping. When that wasn't working, she turned around and lazily opened her eyes. With a start, she realized she wasn't at home. She was naked, tangled in the sheets of someone else's bed. She tried getting up, but only managed to trip herself and noisily flop to the ground. The door creaked open, and a girl dressed in just a shirt stood in the doorway.

"Morning, sleepyhead." she said with a giggle, holding a mug of what smelled like coffee.

Slowly, the past night returned to Elsa. Another fling with another girl she didn't know. One of these times she'd gonna catch something nasty. Like syphilis. Was it even possible to get syphilis from a chick if you were a woman yourself? She didn't know, and honestly, she didn't want to find out.

"What time is it?" she asked sleepily.

The girl turned around, apparently to check a clock, and stretched herself in the process, revealing that she truly only wore that shirt. Elsa immediately felt that tingling rise in her. Which was just as quickly shot down again when the stranger replied with "8:40something AM"

Elsa's eyes widened in shock. _8:40?_ "Shit! Fuck I'm gonna be so late. No no no no."

She clumsily stumbled through the room, still half asleep, and tried to somehow gather up all of her clothes and get into a somewhat presentable state. Her multiple fumbles at attempting to step into the leg of her jeans resulted in barely concealed laughter from the girl watching her.

"Late for what?" she asked. "Busting some crackhead?"

Elsa's gaze shot up, and she froze mid-motion. _'How did she know I'm a...'_

"How did I know?", the girl asked, cutting off her thought. She pointed behind Elsa, where her purse lay face down next to a chair. It must have fallen off during the night, and had spilled its contents. Amongst which were her badge and her service weapon. '_Fuck! Don't be so fucking sloppy, Elsa! Something like is gonna get you killed one day!' _

"Don't worry, I didn't touch that thing." the stranger said. "Would be icing on the cake, you dropping some poor fella for running away with two dollars and a Snickers, and my prints on the gun. Nuh-uh."

Elsa could tell the girl tried to be funny to alleviate the tension, but she failed miserably. You didn't joke about things like that with a cop who took their job seriously. And Elsa did take her job very seriously.

She was finally dressed, if one can call an unbuttoned shirt and missing a sock 'dressed', and started hastily scraping all her stuff back into her purse. Just to be sure she checked the magazine of her gun, and saw to her relief that it was full. It also didn't smell like it had been recently fired.

"Not taking any chances, huh?" the girl commented. She was starting to get on Elsa's nerves.

"No, not with that" she hissed through her teeth. She finally found her other sock and put it on, and started buttoning up her shirt.

"I take it you won't stay for breakfast?"

"Sorry, can't" was Elsa's curt reply. They both knew she wasn't sorry.

"Well, you should get some coffee. The way you sleep can't be very refreshing-"

Elsa shot her a questioning look.

"You were thrashing around like a madman, and at one point I thought you'd start to cry in your sleep. Had to move to the couch to get some shut-eye."

Elsa sighed. Of course she had a nightmare. She was glad she didn't remember it this time, but she knew it perfectly well anyway. It was the same dream every night.

"I'm sorry. Wasn't on purpose." The other girl just made a dismissive gesture.

She did one last check rummaging through her pockets and her purse, to make sure everything was where it should be. Then she took off towards the front door. When she pulled it open she hesitated for a moment.

"Last night was...fun" she said, one foot already outside.

Her one night stand came up to her and smiled. "That it was." She handed Elsa a slip of paper. "That's my number. Call me some time if you're looking for some more...fun."

Elsa took the paper and stuffed it in her pocket without even looking. "Thanks. I will."

They both knew she wouldn't.

"Well, I'll better be off. Bye." she said, and stormed down the stairwell without looking back. Her car was luckily parked just around the corner, a little ways off the club where she had met her lover for the night. She got in with a sigh and checked her appearance in her rear view mirror. It wasn't perfect, but most guys at the precinct wouldn't notice. Kristoff would, though. He never missed those things.

* * *

Just like she had feared, Kristoff had the biggest shit-eating grin on his face when she stumbled through the door to their office, twenty minutes late.

"Rough night, huh?" he said, the grin growing even wider at her flustered state. "'I'm gonna pass out'" he mocked. "So tell me, who did you pass out on top of?"

Elsa soundly ignored him.

"You can try to ignore me, but I know that these are the same clothes you wore yesterday."

Elsa turned around. "So what? My washing machine could be broken."

Kristoff actually sniggered at her statement.

"What?" she groaned, obviously frustrated with her partner's antics.

"I didn't know washing machines could give you such massive hickeys on your collarbone."

"What?!" It was more of a shriek now. She rummaged through the drawers on her desk until she came upon a small hand-mirror, and sure enough, there it was. Her shirt must have skidded down to reveal a big, juicy hickey. She quickly closed two more buttons in an attempt to hide it, hoping it would be enough. The shirt was a bit low-cut and she didn't have any more buttons. Just as she was about to boot up her computer, her desk phone rang.

"Detective McKay?" she answered.

"Good of you to join us, McKay." the voice replied. It was their captain. Kristoff raised a questioning eyebrow, and Elsa moved her index-and middle finger to her nose to indicate a Hitler-stache. They weren't very fond of their superior.

"Captain Sobel. How may I help you today." She fought hard to keep any hint of sarcasm out of her voice.

"Because your record is absolutely spotless otherwise, I'm going to keep it between the two of us, and not order you to my office. Don't make turning up late a habit." he hissed before hanging up.

Elsa threw the receiver back on the cradle, making sure it was firm in place.

"Dick", she finally uttered. Kristoff grinned like a madman.

"Wow, for once you're in trouble, and not me. What is it, opposite day? Wanna switch clothes?"

Elsa couldn't help but laugh at the notion of Kristoff strutting around in her clothes, probably showing off more of his body than was good for anyone in the precinct.

"Let's not." she replied, after calming down.

"So tell me." Kristoff said suddenly.

"Tell you what?" Elsa replied, mildly confused.

"Who is she?"

Elsa blushed. "Uh...I don't...really know to be honest."

Kristoff's mouth hung open. "What do you mean, you don't know. You don't even know her name?"

Elsa blushed even harder. "Well, no. She gave me her number, in case I wanted to have some more 'fun', but we both know this was a one-off."

Her partner scrunched up his face. "But...but why? Was she like, bad in bed? Did she smell? Did she have a dick?"

Elsa had to stifle a laugh at the image. "No. she was actually quite good in bed. But I couldn't stand her face in the morning. She was so incredibly annoying and getting on my nerves, just like all the other girls."

"All the other..." Kristoff blanched at those words. "Okay, now you _have_ to tell me. How many girls did you have in bed?"

Elsa shot him a glare. "This year? I dunno, something between eight and thirteen, yesterday included. I don't keep count."

"Thirt...this year?!" Kristoff had obvious trouble forming coherent sentences. "Wow Elsa that's...wow. Are all of those just one night stands?"

Elsa cocked her head to her side and viewed Kristoff with a curious expression. "You know, there's a reason you've never heard me talk about my girlfriend in all those years we've been partners. Because I never had one. I thought you knew that...the most I've ever had with one of those chicks were like eight or nine times, because we were snowed in at a ski resort for a few days."

Kristoff was about to say something when Elsa's computer beeped, indicating it had finished starting up. Her eyes went back to the bulletin board. To the face sitting there.

"We should get back to the work at hand." she said, and Kristoff knew that the topic was closed. For now.

"Yeah you're right I suppose." he said, still reeling from the nuclear bomb of an admission he was just handed as casually as if it were nothing but a bottle of water.

"I assume neither the girl nor the suspect were spotted during the night?" she asked.

Kristoff sighed. "Nope. But you knew it wouldn't be that easy."

Elsa sighed, too. "Yeah. I didn't expect him to just waltz up to the next best beat cop and throw his hands into the air."

Kristoff chuckled at the image in his head. "Yeah, well, we should really focus on finding that Summers girl. Unfortunately, it looks like her phone is completely dead. Couldn't trace it. Getting the records of her movements from her provider will take about a week, even with a court order. And you know we don't have that time, Elsa. Judging from his usual M/O, we have four or five days before she ends up somewhere in an alley, looking like a pincushion. "

Elsa frowned. "I'm not sure. He knows there was a witness this time. Maybe he'll do nothing at all to her. Maybe she's jumped on a bus to New Mexico with a big 'fuck you' to everyone in her life. Or maybe she's already dead. Him knowing that there is someone who's actually seen him, and could probably identify him, is a new variable, one I don't like one bit."

Kristoff hummed in agreement. "Well, not to forget that this could all be a wild goose chase. What if it's all just a coincidence? There's enough creeps and weirdos running around, an pretty girls vanish on every corner."

Elsa scoffed. "Nah. It fits his pattern too well. Pretty blonde hair, blue eyes, college girl, meeting at her house, insisting that they be alone...it's him. I feel it in my gut."

Kristoff wasn't entirely convinced. "Stranger things have happened. Maybe he insisted on being alone because he wanted to sell a little pick-me-up? A little coke or meth, something that would get him quite some time..."

"Yeah, but freaking out because of her roommate, who wasn't even with them in the same room? They went to her room, they could've done the deal there and she would be none the wiser. Besides, why would she snitch on him?"

Kristoff contemplated for a bit. "Well, little Miss Innocent could try to save her dear friend from the clutches of addiction, and the best way to go about it is cut off the supply."

Elsa chuckled. "Little Miss Innocent? That redhead's using herself, at least pot. Regularly. Probably some LSD or E once in a while, too."

Kristoff laughed. "So you can tell just by the look if some uses? Why haven't you told the captain? Get your promotion to narcotics-K9."

Elsa rolled her eyes. "Haha, very funny. I know a pothead when I see one. And I know for a fact that you yourself are quite fond of a little green magic once in a while."

Kristoff smirked. "Only because you drag me along every single time."

Elsa giggled. "You haven't refused once, and I didn't force you on gunpoint. Anyway, the girl's smoking. I bet you a fiver."

Kristoff smiled. "You're on!"

They fell quiet for a while. It was Elsa who first spoke again. "Anyway, I don't think it's a deal gone bad. Likely story if he would have been high off meth or something, but the way Anna described his behavior he was too collected for such a huge bout ofparanoia to occur out of the blue."

"Anna?" Kristoff asked, with a raised eyebrow.

Elsa let out an exasperated sigh. "Yes, the witness, duh. In case you already forgot."

"Elsa, we've been together since police academy, and you've never, _never ever_ called someone involved in a case just by their first name."

Elsa looked at him with a puzzled expression. "Yes I did."

Kristoff shook his head. "Nuh-uh." When Elsa kept insisting, he simply said. "Whom?"

"Whom what?" Elsa asked.

"Whom did you call by their first name. Give me just one example, besides Ms. Keller just now."

Elsa though about that, and to her surprise she couldn't come up with a single instance of this ever happening before.

"Uh...I guess you're right?" she said, unsure.

Her partner's reaction could not have been more befuddling. He shot up from his chair and let out a holler that was sure to be heard across the building. "Mark the day, everyone, I was _right_!"

To make matters worse he stormed out of their office and started running up and down the corridor, flapping his arms like they were wings and chanting "McKay said I am right~ McKay said I am right~ McKay said I am right~"

The show earned him quite a few laughs and guffaws, and just as many disapproving and reprimanding looks. Elsa was at a complete loss as to what she should do, so she just in the doorway and looked in equal parts amazement and bewilderment at the utterly ridiculous antics of her partner.

She finally decided on amazed when some very nice colleague decided to trip him, and he went flying face-first into some poor beat cop who had just somehow survived her first few weeks without too much mental scarring. Well, goodbye to that.

Elsa held her stomach and threw her head back in laughter, it was so much she actually started crying. She wasn't the only one though, most of the precinct followed suit and laughed all the way until Kristoff was back in his chair, office door closed.

"There go my five minutes under the spotlight." he sighed wistfully.

Elsa, having calmed down a bit, replied "It seems like Icarus has flown too close to the sun that is my brilliance."

Kristoff just rolled his eyes and tried to straighten out the creases that had made their way onto his shirt.

"Well, let's get back to it, shall we." Elsa stated matter-of-factly. "Now where were we..."

"You said you don't believe he's a druggie, at least not the dealing kind."

"Right. And yes, I don't believe that. That bearded face with a nose big enough to land a small aircraft on it, that's our guy. I just feel it in my gut."

"You and your gut" Kristoff said, "why don't you bend over and let a doc take a look at that prostate of yours."

Elsa chuckled. "And here I thought policemen had to know at least a little bit about female anatomy."

"Well, with your sense of commitment I wouldn't be surprised if you had one." Kristoff replied with a smirk that quickly left his face when he caught Elsa's glare. Clearly a touchy subject.

"Sorry" he mumbled under is breath.

Elsa spent the next few minutes staring at the bulletin board, waiting for some as of yet undiscovered pattern to materialize, but it just wouldn't come. She let out a frustrated sigh.

"There must be something here we're not seeing...something..."

"Elsa, stop thinking too hard. Maybe it's something that isn't even on the damned board. Maybe we just overlooked something."

She just scoffed. "Yeah, once maybe, I'll even give you twice. But seven times? No Kristoff. We need to find that pig, and fast. We can't let it become eight dead girls in a year."

"Well, maybe he's just _that_ good. Maybe he's a Lex Luthor-style evil genius, watching us right now and laughing because we're fumbling around in the dark like idiots."

Elsa turned around, a determined expression on her face. "_No_, Kristoff! No matter how good he is, _I_ am better! We need to catch him!"

Kristoff sighed. _'Not you too, blondie.'_ he thought. The signs were evident, and he had witnessed it several times already, with different colleagues. Elsa was becoming obsessed with this case. She had bounced all of their other cases to other detectives in the homicide department. They'd been working on just this case for the last two months, and aside from finally having a face (probably), they had made zero progress. He could see how it was starting to get to her, and if something didn't happen soon it would eat her up. She would burn out, quit the force, probably start drinking, the way he knew her. And that would just be a terrible waste.

He was desperate to get her out of that office. Desperate enough for...

"Els, have any of our guys been at Summers' place yet?"

Elsa turned around, frozen solid. "I...I don't know. I don't think so. What the fuck, why didn't we think of that yesterday? Quick, go get Sven and met me at the parking lot. We're taking my car, I wanna listen to some decent music."

Kristoff sighed. He knew what Elsa thought was 'decent' music. At least he got to take out Sven for the day.

* * *

They'd been driving a good twenty minutes through New York traffic with some ungodly screaming in a demonic tongue blasting out of the speakers, with Elsa bobbing her head and occasionally singing along.

"What was that again?" he shouted over the music.

"Norwegian." Elsa shouted back. "You of all people should know!"

He just shook his head and started scratching Sven behind the ear.

They finally arrived at 91 Astoria Blvd. Elsa killed the engine and Kristoff just prayed that his hearing would recover.

"That was a stupid idea, we don't even know if she's home." he said. "Why do you only listen to my stupid ideas."

"Because somehow," Elsa retorted with a smirk, "your madness has a system. And I'm sure she's home. She wouldn't leave if there was any chance Nicole might just come back on her own."

They went over to the dingy, three-storied house sandwiched between a tiny pizza place and some fast food joint that looked like it hadn't had a visit from the public health department in...forever. _'Lovely'_ she thought.

"Now let's see, door three." She found it, and pressed the button for the bell. After a few moments, the intercom crackled to life.

"H-Hello?" a shy voice asked.

"Anna, it's detective McKay, I've got my partner with me. Mind if we come inside?"

After a few moments, the voice responded. "Um, sure, it's on the second floor. The door is open. Just give me a minute to get dressed."

For some reason, Elsa blushed at those words. Anna buzzed them in, and they made their way upstairs. True enough, door number three was off the latch, and Elsa waited a moment before knocking and slowly pushing the door open. "Anna? It's me."

Suddenly the door was yanked open, and flustered Anna stood before them, in sweatpants and a worn, old sweater. She clearly wasn't expecting visitors.

"Hi Elsa, um, detective Elsa...I'm sorry I'm doing it again." she said, blushing.

Elsa smiled at the sight. "Just Elsa is enough, really." She turned, revealing the burly blond beside her. "This is my partner, detective Bjorgman, and his best and only friend, Sven." She pointed at the man and the dog respectively, a mischievous grin on her face.

Anna gave a shy wave to the looming man, but her face brightened up when she spotted the dog.

"My, aren't you a cutiepie!"

Sven's ears pricked up, and his tail started wagging. Kristoff groaned. "So much for the fearless K9, ripping suspects apart."

Elsa nudged him in the shoulder. "Well, Anna's not a suspect, you oaf."

Anna, happily petting Sven and ignoring the other two people in the hallway, looked up when she heard her name. "Um, why don't you guys come in?" she said, extending her hand inward and closing the door once they were inside.

* * *

**okay, chapter two. Faster than anticipated but i'm writing like a madman and i'm already three chapters ahead. So you get this one a little faster ;)**

_**please note that i've extended the warnings to include a **_**graphic ****rape scene.  
_Disclaimers about possibly triggering or sexy content will be posted at the top of the respective chapters_**

**anyway, keep those lovely reviews coming, I seriously do reply to all of them via PM**

**any ideas/suggestions/criticism is very welcome, as always**

**still looking for a beta, btw**

**peace out**


	3. House call, pt II

**Disclaimer: _very_ graphic depictions of violence/mutilation. Read at your own discretion!**

* * *

They both looked around the room they were standing in. It was obviously the living room, with a couch placed a couple of feet away from the TV hanging from the wall. Behind it stood a large table with a few chairs around, none of which matched, and further behind a small, open kitchen. There were a few doors going off to several rooms. The place looked clean enough, there was just a dirty plate on the coffee table in front of the couch, and a few coats strewn about. Elsa noted a stain in one of the corners that looked suspiciously like mold. _'Why hello there substandard student apartment.'_

Anna was nervously playing with the hem of her sweater. "So, what brings you guys to my humble dwelling?"

Elsa spoke up. "We thought we might look around a bit, maybe find some clues as to where Nicole could be. Is that okay with you?"

Anna nodded quickly. "Yes! Anything to bring her home."

Elsa smiled reassuringly. "Good. First, we'd like to take a look at her room. Oh, and I hope you don't mind the dog going in there."

"Well, Nicole's allergic, but if it helps finding her...Her room is this one." She pointed at a door on the far side of the room, next to the kitchen.

They all went over there and took a look around. Anna was clearly nervous. "Uh, I think I'll let you guys snoop around in peace. Want some coffee? Sure, you're cops, what cop doesn't like coffee. Not that I want to imply that you're like boring or anything, god no, but you know the stereotype. I might have some doughnuts lying around. Wow, another stereotype, great work Anna."

Elsa laughed and interrupted her rambling. "Coffee would be fine, thank you."

Anna, blushing furiously, left the room for the kitchen.

Kristoff huffed. "The room's spotless. Seriously, you could eat off that desk. Nothing really seems out of place. And Sven hasn't picked up anything drug-related either. Looks like you were right."

Elsa sighed. "Sure looks like it. Well, let's continue. Maybe there's something in here that can give us a clue. Look under the bed and in the closet, I'll check the desk and the shelves."

They both went about their work, but both came up empty. "I got nothing" Elsa said, looking out the window. A small cactus was standing on the windowsill, with a bottle of sleeping pills next to it. _'Having trouble sleeping as well, huh?'_

"Me neither" Kristoff replied, "but you gotta hand it to her, there's not a single speck of dust in here. I would wife her just for that."

Elsa rolled her eyes. "God, Kristoff. You're impossible! Sometimes I really wonder why you're my friend."

"Because you're stuck with me, and you just grin and bear it." Kristoff shot back with a smirk.

Anna leaned in from the door. "Coffee's ready, just letting you know."

Both detectives left Nicole's room and went over to the kitchen where Anna was just in the process of pouring delicious-smelling coffee into three mugs. "You guys want milk or sugar?" she asked.

"I'll take some milk, please," Kristoff said, "and a metric ton of sugar for her."

Elsa sighed. "I can speak for myself, thank you very much. But yeah, some sugar would be nice."

Anna rummaged through a few cupboards, but came up empty.

"Where did I put...oh right, my room. Be right back."

She darted to the door that was apparently her room's and went inside. A second after she'd opened it, Sven started sniffing the air, before bolting into Anna's room and starting to bark like the world was about to end.

"Uh guys, help? Is this normal?" she asked with a small voice, obviously scared by the dog's erratic behavior.

Elsa and Kristoff both went into her room, which was in stark contrast to Nicole's. Dirty clothes were lying about everywhere, used plates and cutlery were stacked precariously on a desk that had a laptop sitting on it. Anna was clearly embarrassed about it.

Meanwhile, Sven was still barking at the top drawer of a dresser, occasionally turning his head to look what the hell was keeping his masters from opening the damn thing. Elsa quickly did so, and fished out a small plastic bag filled with weed. Anna's face, now completely devoid of color, was locked in a horrified expression.

"Ha! Told you so." Elsa said, holding out her other hand towards her parnter. "Cough up."

Kristoff frowned and fished five dollars out of his pocket. "Curse you and your gut, woman!"

Elsa, still holding the bag, turned to Anna, who was looking like she was seriously considering jumping out of the window.

"Your underwear drawer, Anna? You gotta do better than that. I keep mine in a Tupperware box, wrapped up in five different plastic bags. Won't fool a K9, but your panties won't smell like weed."

She smiled and tossed the bag to Anna, who didn't even seem to register she was spoken to. Suffice it to say, the bag bounced off her chest and tumbled to the floor. Sven was panting and looking at Kristoff expectantly.

"I got no treats with me, sorry buddy." Sven whined at his words.

Finally, Anna seemed to come back to her senses. "You're...You're not arresting me?" she asked, barely a whisper.

Elsa laughed. "For what, half an ounce of ganja? That's nowhere near worth the hassle. It's not like you're cooking meth in here or anything. Besides, we're homicide and not narcotics, so I care even less about that."

Anna's eyes went wide "Homicide?" she asked. "What...why are you looking for Nicole then? Do you think she's..." She didn't manage to finish the sentence, lip trembling. Elsa mentally kicked herself for slipping up.

"No, we don't believe she's dead." Elsa said, trying to sound reassuring. She sighed, and turned to Kristoff. "Would you wait outside, please? Maybe look around a bit in the living room." The blonde merely nodded and left the room.

"Why don't we sit down?" Elsa said, gently nudging Anna towards her bed, sitting down next to her.

She sighed again. "I didn't want to tell you this, since you're already worrying enough, but I won't lie to you. I'm sure you've heard of the Iceman?" _'What a fucking stupid nickname.'_

Anna frowned. "You mean that freak going around mutilating girls and..." She gasped, her eyes widened with understanding ans shock. "You believe it's him, don't you? The man she brought home." Her trembling voice barely a whisper.

Elsa nodded. "I do, yes. My partner isn't convinced, he thinks it could just be a coincidence. But it all fits his pattern. Nicole is a good-looking girl just out of college, blonde hair, blue eyes, pale skin. His...peculiar behavior when they weren't alone... To me, that's more than a coincidence."

Anna was visibly shaken, shivering slightly.

"Now I don't want to scare you." Elsa quickly said. "There could still be a different explanation for her going missing. She might have lost her purse in an accident, and now she's unconscious in a hospital with no way to identify her."

The redhead scoffed, eyes wet. "You don't believe that."

Elsa sighed once again. "No, I don't. But it's possible. Still, even if she's with him, there is a good chance we'll find her before anything bad happens. Judging from his usual way of going about, we still have four or five days left to get him. And now that we know what he looks like, and roughly where he lives, he'll be in custody in no time." She smiled and grabbed Anna's hand, trying to calm the girl.

Anna took a shaky breath, looking Elsa straight in the eyes for the first time. "I believe you. I trust you that you'll catch this bastard, and bring Nicole home."

"I will." Elsa said, determination in her voice. "And he's going to pay, I promise you that."

Anna eyed with a curious look. "You know, you fit as well."

"Fit?" Elsa asked, surprised.

"The pattern. Blonde, blue eyes, pale skin, beautiful." Anna blushed, scratching the back of her neck. "I mean...you know what I mean."

Elsa blushed, too, and noticed she was still holding Anna's hand. She let it go and brushed an errand strand of hair behind her ear. "Thank you." she said. "But I'd like to see him try to come onto me. Quite a few crackheads were surprised when their own knife was suddenly against their throat."

Anna had wide eyes. "You can do that? How?"

"Krav Maga." Elsa replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. She laughed when Anna simply said "Gesundheit."

"Krav Maga is the official self-defense technique of the Israeli Armed forces. No fancy bullsh...nonsense like in those eastern styles."

"Wow. I'd like to see you do that."

"Well, you can drop by some time when I'm training if you'd like." '_What are you doing Elsa, stop this right now. She's a witness for crying out loud!"_

An awkward silence settled over them, neither knowing how to continue. Elsa just glanced about the room, when she suddenly spotted a Norwegian dictionary on one of the shelves.

"You know Norwegian?" she said, quite surprised.

"Uh, a little bit." Anna replied. "I have an aunt living in Norway, and I think it's a beautiful language. Why?"

"I know a little, too. As a kid I was enamored with Iceland and was dead-set on learning the language. But it's batshit retar...difficult to learn, so I settled for the next-best thing which was Norwegian. It _is_ a beautiful language, though."

"Well, takk for besøket." Anna said with a thick accent.

"Du er velkommen" Elsa replied, her accent just as bad.

Silence again.

"Well." Elsa said after a while, getting up. "I guess we should head back to the station. Thank you for having us."

Anna got up as well. "Thank you for dropping by, detec...Elsa. I'll call you if I can think of anything else important."

Elsa smiled. "Please do. And hide your stash better." she added, with a wink.

They went out to a waiting Kristoff, who was just sitting on the couch, petting Sven.

"You girls done?" he simply asked.

Elsa rolled her eyes. "Yeah, we are. We should head out."

They moved to the front door. Once outside, Elsa turned around.

"Thanks again for having us, Anna." She frowned, looking at the door. "You should think about upping your security. Keep your door locked."

Anna nodded. "I will. Thanks for dropping by. And please, find her." she said, urgency in her voice.

"We will." Elsa replied. "Stay safe. Bye."

Kristoff just grunted until Elsa jabbed him in the ribs. "Ow, what's your problem?"

"Don't be rude, say goodbye."

Kristoff rolled his eyes. "'twas a pleasure making your acquaintance, fair maiden. I bid thee farewell." he said with a mock bow.

Anna giggled while Elsa hid her face in her hands. "God, you're impossible."

"Goodbye, Anna. Sorry for dragging that brainless buffoon along."

Anna laughed. "It's quite alright. Goodbye."

Back in the car, Elsa sighed and rubbed her temples. "Still nothing. I don't get it. He must slip up _somehow_, goddamnit!"

"He didn't, at least not in there. Aside from confirming that your _green thumb_ has a sixth sense, this was totally pointless."

_'Not totally pointless'_ Elsa though while staring up the window that was Anna's.

Kristoff looked a t her. "What?"

Elsa whirled around, eyes wide. _'Did I say that out loud? Shit!'_ "Um, nothing, I didn't say anything."

Kristoff continued staring at her, until he burst out laughing. "Holy shit, you've got the hots for her!"

Elsa blushed furiously. "No I don't. Where do you always get those ridiculous ideas?!"

"Your face begs to differ" Kristoff simply replied.

Elsa sighed. "Even if, it doesn't matter. She's a witness in an ongoing case."

"You know that's not forbidden per se" Kristoff said.

"Duh, no shit, Sherlock. Still, if we ever catch that guy she'll have to testify, and if word gets out that I had a tumble with her no judge will believe a word she says. I can't compromise our only witness."

"Have it your way, then" Kristoff said, pulling something out of his coat. "Oreo?" he said, handing her a cookie.

"Where did you...don't tell me you got that from her apartment!"

Kristoff laughed. "You gonna take it if I say no?"

Elsa just shook her head in denial, shoving the cookie in her mouth. She turned the key in the ignition, causing Norwegian screaming and distorted guitars to once again burst through the speakers in a deafening volume. Kristoff winced visibly.

"That's what you get for stealing, from a witness no less." Elsa said with a smirk.

* * *

Anna watched from behind the curtains as Elsa and her partner got into a black sedan, talking for a bit before finally driving off. She sighed and turned away, stepping onto the plastic bag still lying on the floor. _'Better stash that away.'_

When she was satisfied with the new hiding place (in plain sight next to a very dead cactus on a shelf), she went to the front door to make sure it was locked. Suddenly, the weight of the situation came crushing down on her, the implications of her roommate at the mercy of a deranged killer hitting her full force. She slumped down, back against the door, and started sobbing uncontrollably. Hugging her knees to her chest she sat there, ignoring the phone vibrating in her pocket.

After a while she calmed down enough to get up again and wander aimlessly through the apartment. She arrived in the kitchen, an empty and two full coffee mugs sitting on the counter. Now cold, she poured them down the drain and rinsed the cups. Her stomach growled, but she ignored it. Her steps finally carried her to Nicole's room, and she leaned in the doorway, taking the room in. she could immediately spot the few things that had been moved around by her unexpected visitors. Nicole always kept her room impeccable, and the few items out of place stood out like a sore thumb.

She smiled ruefully, lying down in her roommate's bed and hugging her pillow. Tears started welling up again, but she fought them down. _'Don't do that, Anna. You're helping nobody by wallowing in self-pity. Get up! Now! Do something! Study, or whatever.'_

She resolutely got up and strode to her room, almost violently mashing the button to turn on her laptop. She waited for it to boot up, and then sat there, unmoving.

_'Great! You did something. Now do something again.'_

"But what?" she murmured to herself.

She moved the cursor to the browser icon and double-clicked. Immediately her social feeds started assaulting her with dozens of notifications and messages. She ignored them, instead browsing to Google. She slowly started typing a few words into the search bar.

'iceman killings new york'

The cursor blinked and her finger hovered over the enter-key.

_'You shouldn't do this. Anything but that. You'll regret this. Don't...'_ her finger pushed the button.

Immediately, links to newspaper articles and official statements appeared. A few images popped up as well, and for once Anna was glad she had safe-search turned on by default. She glanced over the descriptions beneath the linked pages. She halted at a sensational line, obviously designed for the most clicks possible.

'How does the Iceman serve his victims? Find out here at...'

The cursor moved to the link. She hesitated. _'You can still turn back. Don't click it!'_

She clicked. And spent the next half hour reading through dozens of articles claiming to know every nasty detail. The words started to blur when her eyes filled with tears again. 'heart carved out...filled with ice...head completely shaven...'

She finally slammed the laptop shut when she couldn't take it anymore. She was sick to the stomach, even with what little the authors of these articles actually knew. She stood up and started pacing around the room, trying to make sense of the maelstrom of thoughts and emotions coursing through her head. She wanted to smash something, some_one_, but at the same time she wanted to crawl under her covers, fall asleep and, when she woke up again, find that this all had been a nightmare. A horrible, detailed nightmare.

Eventually, the latter won out. She crawled into her bed, not bothering to change out of her clothes, and pulled her knees to her chest. A glance at the clock revealed that it was only 4 PM, but she didn't care. She just wanted to close her eyes and forget. It didn't work. For one, the room was too bright to sleep. More importantly, though, she couldn't shut down the thoughts, the images running wild.

With a heavy sigh she got up again and moved to her shelf, picking up the container she had placed there just a few hours ago. She then opened her closet and got out her bong, still filled with the stale water from last time. She didn't bother to change it. After grinding some of her weed and mixing it with tobacco, she put into the bowl, held a lighter to it and inhaled deeply. She tried to hold the smoke in as long as she could, and continued doing this until nothing was left in the bowl.

She kicked back, feeling her toes and fingertips getting tingly. Any minute now it would start, the pointless musings, the giggling at nothing, the insatiable hunger. But it didn't. Anna just felt empty. Completely devoid of any conscious thought. Not even the ungodly amount of pot she had just smoked got any happy feelings into her. At least the bad ones were gone now, too. She put the bong down, pulled the drapes and vanished under her comforter again, finally being able to sleep.

* * *

Elsa plopped down into her chair with a sigh. Kristoff was still happily munching away on oreos, not feeling the slightest bit of shame for having 'procured' them in Anna's apartment.

"Someone's been through my stuff" Elsa suddenly said. Kristoff looked up surprised, and for once demonstrated manners by swallowing his mouthful of cookies before speaking.

"What? How do you know that?"

"Well, for starters the mouse is on the wrong side of the keyboard. I'm left-handed. Also there's some sensitive documents lying about in the open. I _always_ put these out of sight." Elsa sighed, unsure how to proceed.

"Anything specific?" Kristoff asked.

Elsa looked over the documents. "Not really, just various testimonies, autopsy reports...all about the Iceman."

"Makes sense, since it's our only case." her partner replied.

Elsa contemplated for a bit. "But why would anyone go through my stuff? If they wanna help us out or something they just have to ask."

"Maybe it's captain Hitler, looking to dig up some dirt on you. You know Sobel hates it that he has absolutely no leverage over you, should anything happen."

"Maybe...well, nothing we can do about it right now." Elsa said with apprehension, starting to store away the files lying in the open. She didn't like that new development one bit. Something was very wrong.

Kristoff could sense how agitated his partner was. "Listen Els, I'm gonna go and make a few inquiries. Maybe someone has seen a person enter while we were gone."

"Thanks, Kris. But please be discreet."

Kristoff laughed. "I'm always discreet, sugartit."

_'Sugartit? Where the fuck does he pick up those ridiculous nicknames?'_ "Like that one time when someone replaced the regular coffee with decaf and you were literally running through the whole building, trying to find the culprit?"

"Coffee is serious business. This is just an office break-in where somebody got a look at confidential documents. No biggie." he said with a serious voice.

Elsa laughed, despite the situation. "Just go already. And while you're at it, get me some coffee, please?"

Kristoff smiled. "Black, with milk, no sugar?"

"You know it, pretty boy."

A few minutes later he returned with her coffee and took off again to make his ''discreet' inquiries (she could hear his rambunctious laughter through the closed door).

Somewhat calm again after sipping on her coffee, Elsa sat in her chair, once again going over all the evidence they had compiled. It wasn't much. The killer was very careful, and probably had experience with eliminating any trace that could lead to him. They had plenty of DNA on him, but he wasn't in any database they had access to. The girls always looked the same, and where always killed the same, but other than that there was not much of a pattern they could work out.

The victims had no overlapping social circles, didn't live in close proximity nor frequented the same bars and clubs. Only two of them had been at the same university, with very different majors. Their bodies were found in seemingly random locations, a bit off the main streets but close enough so they would be discovered by early-morning commuters, still freezing cold. It was obviously important to the 'Iceman' that the bodies were found with the ice not already molten. They always looked the same: head shaven, eyes gouged out, nose and lips removed. The heart was carved out, and there were several stab wounds on their breasts and lower abdomen, the genitalia was mutilated as well. And everything, the empty eye sockets, the mouth, the chest cavity where the heart used to be, even their vaginas were stuffed with ice.

_'It has obviously some deeper meaning for him. He wants to destroy their beauty, and preserve his work with the ice for as long as possible. But what does he want to tell us with the heart?'_

Luckily, the press knew very little about that, but even the few bits that had trickled through worked the public into a frenzy. The killer was at large for over a year now, and the commissioner was under heavy pressure to finally get some good news. _'If he finds out we have a facial composite he'll want it in the news ASAP. Not until we've found Nicole. Who knows what he'll do if we freak him out'_

Elsa rubbed her temples, feeling the onset of yet another headache. She picked up her phone and dialed the front desk. "Phyllis? Yeah, it's McKay. Do we have any new info, any sightings on Nicole Summers or the Iceman? Okay, make sure to inform me right away if something _does_ come in. Thanks." She groaned and leaned back in her chair, staring at the ceiling. _'There must be _something_! Anything. Everybody slips up once in a while.' _Yet she didn't see it. There was no tangible lead anywhere, and even the picture hadn't gotten them any closer. She grabbed the autopsy reports again, looking for something she might have overlooked the first hundred times she had studied them. She knew them by heart by now, and she knew she wouldn't find anything there, either. Still, she had to busy herself somehow.

The reports were infuriatingly similar. No unusual substances. Traces of zolpidem, ibuprofen, penicilin. Some of the victims had traces of lyergic acid diethylamide and benzoylmethylecgonine, others had tetrahydrocannabinol or 3,4-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine in their bodies. The usual party drugs and the occasional blunt, nothing out of the ordinary. Elsa was slowly growing desperate, and every passing minute meant less time to rescue Nicole.

After a while, Kristoff returned to their office. "Hey Els. Studying the autopsies again?"

Elsa sighed and tossed the files on her desk. "Yeah."

"Did anything magically appear that wasn't there the first fifty times you read them?"

"Nope." Elsa replied, rubbing her tired eyes. "Did you come up with any info on our little house guest?"

"Nobody saw or heard anything."

"Figures." Elsa said with a scoff. "It probably _was_ Sobel or one of his lackeys sniffing around."

She glanced at her watch. _'2PM already?'_

"Let's go grab some late lunch. We won't get anything done in here anyway."

Kristoff just shrugged and followed her outside.

* * *

**Zolpidem** – active ingredient in common sleeping pills, like Ambien

**Ibuprofen** – active ingredient in cold medicine and painkillers, like Advil

**Peniciln** – antibiotic

**lyergic acid diethylamide** – LSD

**benzoylmethylecgonine** – cocaine

**tetrahydrocannabinol** – THC, as in weed

**3,4-methylenedioxy-methamphetamine** – MDMA, the active ingredient in ecstasy

* * *

**would you look at that, it's monday already (at least where i live). which means a new chapter for you guys. i hope you like it. special thanks go out to converge for writing the song 'all we love we leave behind' which was kinda an inspiration for this story and is on repeat ever since i started writing this. look it up on youtube.  
**

**i'm also still looking for a beta. don't be shy about messaging me folks, for beta-ing or other, completely unrelated stuff. i only bite if you want me to ;)**

**reviews/suggestions/feddback is, as always, very welcome**

**peace out**


	4. Break-in

Elsa was stumbling through the dark. She couldn't see her own hand before her eyes, but knew there was someone else, close to her. She decided to just wander off into a direction, hopeful to bump into the person. Suddenly, a bright light appeared in the distance, illuminating someone from behind. It was a feminine figure, but her features were shrouded in darkness. Only her beautiful black hair could be seen. Elsa took off into her direction, walking resolutely. The prospect of meeting that person filled her with a feeling of peace and content, so she sped up. She held out her hand to touch the person, but just moments before she could do so, the light went out again and she grasped into thin air. She heard a scream behind her and whirled around, to see that same figure in front of another bright light, but this time with her head bowed. Another person, obviously a male, slowly strode up to her from behind. The sight filled her with an ominous sense of foreboding, which quickly turned into dread when she saw the newcomer holding a knife. She wanted to shout out, but no sound left her lips. Just as the man lifted the knife to stab the girl from behind, she shot up in her bed, drenched in sweat.

She quickly realized that it was the ringing of her phone that had forced her out of the nightmare, thankfully before the worst part happened. Not that it mattered, she had seen it happen countless times anyway. She reached for the phone and frowned when she didn't recognize the number, but picked up anyway.

"McKay." she simply said.

"Elsa?" It was Anna's terrified voice.

"Anna? What's wrong?" Elsa said, immediately wide awake.

"There's someone trying to get inside. They're doing something to the door. Please help me, I'm scared!"

_'Stay calm, Elsa.'_ "Okay, first of all, move away from that door! Then, say loud and clear 'I've called the police, they'll be here any minute. Go away.'"

She got up and frantically tried to get dressed with one hand while listening to what was going on.

"I...I think it worked." Anna whispered, "there's no more sounds coming from the door."

Elsa quickly switched the phone to her other hand to slip into a shirt.

"Okay, but we better not take any chances. Can you lock the door to your room?"

"Yes."

"Good, then go there and lock it. I'm on my way. I'll stay with you on the phone."

She grabbed her badge and her gun, stuffing both into her belt and ran out the door. Once in her car she turned on the mobile radio. "Dispatch, this is detective McKay 3141, I need backup at 91 Astoria Boulevard. ASAP. Code 5-15, imminent danger!"

She floored the accelerator and took off into the night with screeching tires, emergency lights turned on. "3141 this is Dispatch. A patrol car is on it's way. ETA ten minutes."

_'That's not fucking fast enough!'_ "Anna are you still with me?"

"Yes, I'm here, I'm alright."

"Okay. Stay in your room and do not let anybody in until I say so, even if they claim to be from the police."

"Okay. When will you be here?"

Elsa thought about the route. "Depends on the traffic, but I should make it in about fifteen minutes."

She sped through the streets, running every red light with reckless abandon. All the while she talked to Anna and tried to calm her down. When she was just a few blocks away, there was another knock on Anna's door.

"Elsa, there's someone on the front door again. They say they're police."

"Okay, tell them to show you their badges through the peephole and tell me their numbers. Do _not_ open the door!"

Anna did as she was told. "Uh, the numbers are 4107 and 4115."

"Okay, hold on a sec." - "Dispatch this is McKay 3141, confirm service numbers of officers on-site at 91 Astoria Boulevard, 4107 and 4115." After a few tense seconds she got the reply. "3141 this is Dispatch. These numbers are correct."

Elsa sighed in relief. "Roger Dispatch, 3141 out."

She put the phone against her ear again. "Okay Anna, they are with us. You can let them in. Let me talk to one of them."

"Hello?" a male voice spoke through the phone.

"This is detective Elsa McKay, 3141, identify yourself."

"Officer David Rodriguez, 4107. With me is my partner, officer Klein, 4115. How may we help you, detective?"

"Just make sure the girl is safe, officer. I'll be there momentarily. Give the phone back to her, please."

"Elsa?" Anna's voice again.

"Hey Anna, I'm almost there. Do whatever the officers say, okay? I'll hang up now, I can already see your house. See you in a minute."

"Okay. Bye"

The line went dead the moment Elsa screeched to a halt. Without bothering to lock her car she ran to the intercom and rang number three. Once she was upstairs she took a good look at the door. There were obvious signs of someone trying to crack the lock, luckily with little success. She knocked, and was welcomed by an officer demanding to see her badge. When she showed it to him he fully opened the door, saying "Good morning, detective." with a smirk. Elsa glanced at her watch. 3:51 AM.

"Good morning, officer...Rodriguez, right?" she replied, eying his badge number.

"Correct." he replied. "Eddie's with the girl on the couch, trying to calm her down. He's better at this than I am."

Elsa nodded an entered the room, seeing the other officer in a futile attempt to console a shaking Anna.

"Is everything alright, here, officer?" Elsa called out.

Anna turned around and visibly calmed upon seeing her.

The other policeman got up and walked over to her. "She got scared good, but other than that she seems to be fine." In a low voice he asked "How did you know she was in trouble?"

Elsa sighed. "She's a witness in an ongoing case and has my number. When she heard something at the door she must have panicked and called me instead of 911."

He nodded in understanding. "Well, looks like she got lucky. The door is pretty banged up, though."

Elsa looked at Anna who was now sitting on the couch with her head down, lost in thoughts.

"Well, thank you guys for responding so quickly. I'll take over now and let you get back to your duties."

All three cops went to the front door and looked at it warily.

"Want us to call in forensics to take a look at that, detective?" one of them said.

"That would be nice, thank you. When's your shift over?"

"Three more hours and then it's off to bed." Rodriguez said with a smile that turned into a yawn.

"Well then, have a nice and quiet night. See you around."

They both inclined their heads and went down the stairs. Elsa closed and locked the door again. When she turned around she was tackled by a blur of red hair. Anna wrapped her arms around the flabbergasted blonde sobbing into her shoulder.

"Thank you so much for coming. I just panicked and didn't know what to do so I called you instead of 911 but I'm glad you're here now and sorry I really didn't want to wake you up I was just so scared and did the first thing that came to my mind which was 'call Elsa!' and looking back I realize that it was really stupid. I'm so sorry for waking you up."

After the initial surprise Elsa tentatively returned the embrace and chuckled after Anna had finished with her word-vomit.

"It's quite alright, Anna. You did the right thing by calling me. A detective ordering backup tends to get people in uniform here faster than 'I heard something at my door'. And who said you woke me up?"

Anna managed to giggle through her sobs. "You haven't looked into a mirror, have you?"

Elsa's response of widening her eyes in shock and shooting her hands up to her hair made Anna laugh.

"Shit." Elsa gasped, furiously trying to get her wild bedhead under control. "You don't happen to have a brush lying around that I could borrow?" Elsa asked, blushing.

"As a matter of fact I do." Anna replied, vanishing into her room and returning shortly thereafter, handing Elsa her brush.

"Thank you." Elsa said with a shy smile.

"Anything for the dashing hero flying to my rescue, completely ignoring her own appearance in the process."

"I'm just doing my job, Anna." Elsa said with a small laugh.

"Oh so you are on duty tonight? What you your superiors say when they knew you slept on the job?"

Elsa rolled her eyes. "God you're just as bad as Kristoff."

"Oh yes. Him." Anna said with an icy voice. "You better tell him to bring a whole truckload of oreos if he ever dares showing his face again."

Elsa froze mid-brush when she saw Anna's serious face, but the redhead couldn't stop a smirk from appearing.

"I guess he thought I wouldn't notice because basically half my pantry is oreos." she said. "But considering you have been so sweet all the time and came at 4 AM when I needed you, we'll call it even."

Elsa smiled and continued trying to reign in her rebellious hair. Eventually she just gave up and decided to put it into a messy ponytail. Just then she remembered that she went to bed without bothering to remove her makeup, and immediately blushed again. "Would you mind if I used your bathroom?"

"Not at all." Anna replied, showing her the door.

To her relief, Elsa saw that her eyeshadow was just a little bit smudged. She removed it with a pad and applied some eyeliner. When she returned, Anna was in the process of pouring two cups of coffee.

"Oh thank god, just what I needed right now." Elsa said, suddenly acutely aware of how tired she was, now that the adrenaline had left her system.

Anna smiled. "Sugar and no milk, right?"

Elsa nodded. Anna reached for a cupboard, but remembered the sugar was still in her room. She went there to retrieve it, only to tip something over with an audible crash. "Fucking shit! Not again."

"Do you need help?" Elsa called out from the kitchen.

"No, I'm just a klutz as always." Anna yelled back. She came back to the kitchen to dump some broken glassware into the trash. Elsa smiled when she recognized the bong.

"It's the third one I've broken in just as many months." Anna said with a blush.

Elsa laughed, and they both stood there in an awkward silence until she pointed to her coffee.

"Oh right, still no sugar" Anna gasped, smacking her head. This time she made it back without incident and watched in amazement as Elsa dumped a little mountain of white crystals into her mug. She then grabbed her own and took a small sip.

"Um, should we sit down?"

"Sure, why not." Elsa said. Anna led them to the couch. Once they both sat down Elsa couldn't hold back a yawn.

"Sorry again for waking you up. I feel horrible about it."

Elsa smiled. "It's really not a big deal. I don't sleep too well anyway."

Anna sent her a questioning look.

"Just...bad dreams." Elsa said, apprehension in her voice. She could see the redhead wanted to ask her about it but chose to remain silent, which she was very thankful for. She had never told anybody about the nightmare she was having every night for the past nine years.

They sat in silence, sipping at their coffee and glancing around the room, both trying not to look at the other.

After a while, Anna spoke up again. "Um...so now that the danger's over I guess you'll want to go home again?"

Elsa could her in her voice that she wasn't very fond of the idea.

"No, I'll stay until the captain comes in, then I'll arrange for a security detail to stay with you 24/7. Un-unless you want me to go?"

"No!" Anna said much too quickly. "Um, no. I, ah, I feel safe having you around." She smiled shyly.

"This isn't standard procedure, is it?" she asked after a while.

Elsa pretended to take a sip from her empty cup to hide her blushing face. "No, it isn't. I just want to make sure you're safe."

"Why?" the redhead simply asked.

_'Yes, why? Because she's so much like her, that's why!'_ Elsa thought for a while, trying to find the right words. "You remind me of my...of _someone_, a person very close to me that I lost a few years ago. I guess I try to protect you to kinda make up for it that I couldn't protect her. Subconsciously or something like that."

Anna took in the words, and came to the only logical conclusion. "She was your girlfriend, wasn't she?" she said quietly.

Elsa just nodded with her head hanging low, still holding onto the empty cup as if her life depended on it. Just thinking about her made all the hurt well up again, all the pain she had fought so hard to bury and forget. They fell quiet again.

"What was her name?" Anna asked suddenly. Elsa's eyes shot up, intently studying Anna's face. The redhead squirmed under her scrutiny.

"Just forget I asked, I'm sorry. You're obviously uncomfortable and I'm an insensitive social retard, as always."

She averted her face and started worrying over the hem of her shirt. She was certain to have killed the fragile sapling of friendship and trust that was growing between them, when Elsa spoke up unexpectedly. "Julia" she said, barely a whisper. "her name was Julia."

Anna looked up, and mentally kicked herself for bringing up the topic in the first place. She could see Elsa was still hurting.

"That's a beautiful name." Anna said, not trusting her brain to come up with anything else.

"Yes." Elsa said, smiling wistfully.

They both jumped when they heard a scraping sound coming from the front door. Elsa motioned for Anna to stay put and walked to the door, looking through the peephole. She could only see a figure crouching down, obviously inspecting the lock.

"I'm armed and with the NYPD. Identify yourself!" she shouted through the door, left hand moving to the firearm by her side.

"I'm officer Pulaski with forensics. I was dispatched to investigate a 5-15?" came the muffled reply. Elsa relaxed visibly, but kept her hand on the gun, just to be sure. She unlocked and opened the door and peeked outside, relieved when she recognized the man.

"Dave! Funny they would send you."

The man was equally surprised to see her. "I certainly didn't expect to see _you_ here, Elsa. A very pleasant surprise, mind you." he said with a smirk.

His attention returned to the door. "Looks ugly. What happened?"

Elsa sighed. "At about zero three thirty an unidentified suspect tried to gain entry into the apartment. The tenant is involved in an ongoing case of mine and called me for help."

Dave nodded. "Any news on that guy?"

Elsa simply shook her head. Everyone at the precinct knew that she and Kristoff were only working on one case.

"Well then, better get to work" he said, now completely blocking out everything else. He murmured to himself and occasionally shook his head while inspecting the door closer, before beginning the usual process of taking fingerprints and photographs.

"That wasn't a very handy man, I can tell you that." he said after a while. "A person who knows what they're doing would have that lock open in fifteen seconds, and wouldn't even wake up a cat in the process."

He scratched the back of his neck and then shook his head again. "Looks to me like they tried to force the door open at first, maybe with a crowbar, and when that didn't work they took a screwdriver to the lock. Morning ma'am!"

The last sentence made Elsa turn around, and she saw that Anna had silently come up behind her to see what was going on. She gave a shy wave to the other policeman.

Ten minutes later, Dave began packing up. "Looks like I'm done here." He turned to Anna."You'll have to at least replace the lock, but if you want my opinion, you should replace the whole damn door with something sturdier. I honestly can't imagine how that guy managed to _not_ force the door open, especially with the tools he obviously had with him. Anyway, I'll be off now." He looked at Elsa. "See you at the station?"

"Sure thing." she replied, "bye."

"Alright, see ya." Looking at Anna, he said "Goodbye, Miss." and walked down the stairs.

Elsa closed and locked the door again. Turning around she saw Anna had moved to the kitchen.

"I assume you'd like another cup?" she asked.

Elsa smiled. "Yes, please."

She moved to the couch and sat down, mulling over the strange events of the night. _'It just doesn't make sense. If he really wanted to get inside, he could have done it. Does he just want to scare her? Maybe it wasn't even him, just some druggie neighbor who confused the doors...no, no it was him alright. But why?'_

She was yanked out of her thoughts when Anna slightly tugged at her shoulder, pointing at the mug sitting before her on the coffee table.

"Thank you." Elsa mumbled, embarrassed that she hadn't noticed Anna setting it down. She took a sip and hummed with content. "Your coffee is really good."

Anna just smiled and made a dismissive hand gesture. An awkward silence once again descended on them, both women fighting to find an appropriate topic for a conversation.

"So, college." Elsa finally said. "What are you studying?"

Anna brightened at the question. "Well, my major is political science, and as a minor I've picked English Literature."

Elsa raised an eyebrow at Anna's words, but her question was cut off by the redhead.

"I know it sounds pretty weird, like that wouldn't fit me. Don't worry, I get that a lot." she said with a laugh.

"It's just...my dad was mayor at the little town I spent my childhood in, and in his last year even a State Representative, until he died of a heart attack. I guess I kinda take after him in that regard. I just want to do something meaningful, tackle the big issues, you know? And, well, you can only really do that if you have a modicum of power, or else people just ignore you."

Elsa eyed her with a mix of admiration and sadness. _'They're so much alike. So much.'_ She forced a smile onto her face. "Well, as far as I can tell you have your heart in the right place."

Anna blushed furiously and looked at her feet. "Thank you."

After a while she said "I still have to practice that speaking thing, though."

Elsa laughed. "You could use some practice, yes. But I'm sure you'll do just fine."

They continued to talk about university, which lectures were particularly interesting and which weren't, why she chose to live in an apartment rather than on campus, and time just flew by. With a start Elsa noticed the first beams of the sun rising over the skyline creeping through the window. She glanced at her watch. _'Almost 7 AM. Captain should be in by now.'_

"Listen Anna, I'm gonna call Hitler-um my captain...shit did I just really say that out loud?"

Anna stared at her incredulously before breaking into hysterical laughter. Elsa was at a complete loss for words and just sat there, a stupid half-smile on her face.

Anna had finally calmed down enough to speak and said, still fighting giggles "You really don't like him, huh?"

"Not really, no." Elsa said. "He's...a dick." She wanted to say 'crooked to the bone', 'selectively promoting his friends', 'keeping files on every subordinate that would make J. Edgar Hoover proud'. Instead she settled on 'dick', which was just as apt and wouldn't get her into too much trouble with the Internal Affairs Bureau.

"Still, I better call him to arrange everything for your protection."

She stood up and fingered her phone out of her pocket and dialed his number.

"Hey Captain, it's McKay...Yeah, I'll come in late today, there's been an incident with my witness...Come again?...Oh, someone tried to enter her apartment. My suspicion is that our guy wanted to intimidate her into staying quiet. She'll need a security detail 24/7 and...what?...What do you mean, understaffed?! There's like twenty people constantly sitting at their desk with their thumbs up their ass because they've got nothing to do!...I don't...Well thanks for nothing! I'll still be late, _someone_ has to keep her safe...yeah whatever, knock yourself out!"

She hung up and hurled her phone into the couch, where it bounced off and tumbled to the floor.

"That _fucking_ asshole!" Elsa yelled, pacing around the room. "Just because he doesn't have any dirt on me he's deliberately sabotaging my case!" She stopped, rubbing her temples. Anna apparently decided that for once it would be better if she stayed quiet, moving instead to pick up the discarded phone and see if it was damaged. It wasn't, but this clearly wasn't the first time Elsa had done something like that, judging from the banged-up state of the device.

After a few moments of silence, Elsa turned around and pointed to Anna's room.

"Go pack an overnight bag with all your necessities and a few sets of spare clothes. Don't forget the stuff you need for school."

Anna had no idea what Elsa was going at. "What, why would I...?" She trailed off when she saw Elsa's determined expression, clearly accepting no talking back whatsoever.

"Where am I going?" Anna asked as she moved to her room.

"My place." Elsa stated flatly. "I won't let you stay here on your own."

Elsa could see Anna stop for the briefest moment before she continued into her room, packing whatever she thought necessary. Underwear, several shirts and pants, a few sweaters and coats. She tried stuffing all of the textbooks she would need into her backpack, but ended up dropping them into a second bag instead. When she was finished she put the bags next to her door and made a round through the rooms to check if everything was switched off, then returned to a waiting Elsa.

"Do you think this will be enough?" she asked the blonde.

"If things go well you won't need even half of the stuff you packed, but better safe than sorry." she replied with a smile.

Elsa grabbed the bag with the books which was surprisingly heavy, but got it downstairs nonetheless. Anna followed after locking the door behind her, with considerable trouble due to the night's events.

They sat in the car in silence while they drove, until Elsa spoke up. "Do you need to go to school today?"

"Yes."

"Okay, then we'll just drop your stuff off at my place and I'll take you there."

Anna opened her mouth to protest, but Elsa cut her off. "I won't take no for an answer. When will you be finished?"

"Um...around five I believe."

"Alright. Just give me a call and I'll pick you up. You'll get a tour of the house and your own key then."

She saw Anna squirm in her seat.

"What?" Elsa said in an annoyed tone she immediately regretted.

"It's just...this is way too much, Elsa. I can't expect you to do all this for me."

Elsa smiled. "Well, you didn't expect it, and I'm doing it anyway. Unless you want me to take you into preventative custody?" she added with a smirk.

"Um...well, your place sounds just fine."

Elsa laughed. "Thought so. Now shut up about it."

Anna stuck her tongue out. "Talk about police brutality. You're violating so many of my rights right now."

"It's not like I forced you at gunpoint. And if you insist I can still turn around." Elsa said with a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"Alright, alright, I'll be quiet." Anna replied with a smile.

When they arrived at Elsa's apartment building, she got out of the car and grabbed the bags sitting on the back seat. "Stay in the car, I won't be long. Do you have all the material you need today?"

Anna took a quick peek into her backpack and nodded.

"Alright, stay put." With that she walked into the building, carrying the heavy bags seemingly without effort. When she vanished through the doors, Anna looked around. It was a very nice neighborhood, unusually clean for New York. She took note of the little Italian restaurant at the corner and wondered if Elsa liked to eat there.

Suddenly the door was yanked open and Elsa got back into the car. "What did I say, not three minutes." she said with a radiant smile. "Now, where to?"

Anna gave her directions to campus and they set off.

* * *

An hour later, Elsa walked through the doors of the precinct and made a beeline for her office.

Kristoff was already sitting at his desk, grinning when he saw her getup. "You look like shit."

"I hate you too, Kris." Elsa replied with a laugh.

"Rough night again?"

"You could say that" she replied when she fell into her chair.

"Do you know her name at least, this time?"

"Yeah," she replied, reproducing the dirty grin he had shot her a few days before "Anna Keller."

His face was priceless. "You're shitting me, right?"

"Nope. But it's not what you think" she said in a serious tone. "_Someone _tried to break into her apartment tonight, and she called me. I stayed there to make sure she was safe and tried to get her a security detail. But Hitler shot me down." She glanced to the door to make sure it was closed. "This _must not_ leave this room, alright? I've taken her to my place for a while, I don't know who I can trust in here, besides you. Something here stinks ten miles upwind. First someone goes through my case files, now Sobel won't give me a security detail because we're _understaffed_..." She scoffed, leaning back in her chair.

Her phone rang, and she knew exactly who was calling her. "Speak of the devil." she sighed before picking up.

"McKay...Yes, _captain_." She spat the last word with as much venom as she could muster and hung up.

"Well, I'm off to the gallows. Wish me luck."

Kristoff just sighed and massaged his temple. Apparently she was rubbing off on him.

She made her way to his office, his secretary just waving her through when she arrived.

"Close the door, please." he said after she entered. "Sit." He motioned to a chair in front of his desk.

"You know what this is about, detective?"

Elsa despised the man. "Mardi Gras?" she asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

He leaned back and, to her surprise, chuckled. "Very funny, McKay. This is a perfect example. Your recent behavior has been unacceptable. You waltz in when you please, talk to witnesses when you're not on duty, cause a ruckus in the office..." he was obviously referring to Kristoff's antics the day before.

"I'll give you a last warning." he continued, "The next infraction will get an official reprimand, and you wouldn't want that when you're up for review, now, would you?"

Elsa stared at him. _'The audacity!_' "Are you threatening me?" she said in a cold voice.

She had to fight hard not to just get up and slap him across the face when she saw his smug smile.

"Not at all, detective. Just some..._friendly advice_ between colleagues. And you better make some headway on the Iceman-case. As far as I'm aware you've made no progress at all for the last two months."

That was the last straw. "I would if I knew the only fucking witness was safe!" she yelled, standing up.

"There's no need to get loud. I told you we're..."

"Understaffed, yeah. Save it." She leaned down on his desk and stared him straight into the eyes. He held her stare, but she was pleased to see the nervous twitch in his eyelids.

"If that's all, _captain_." she said, straightening her back. "I'll go _make some headway_. Don't stand up, I'll show myself out."

With that she turned on her heel and strutted out of the room, head high. She didn't bother closing the door, but noted with a small smile all the heads suddenly turning away. There was no doubt they all had heard her yelling, and seen her swagger out of his office.

She groaned when she fell back into her chair after slamming her own door shut.

"That bad?" Kristoff asked.

"I'll get an _official reprimand_ on my _next infraction_." she said in a mocking voice. "Hitler is too nice for him. From now on he's Stalin. Suits him better anyway, with that obnoxious face caterpillar he calls a beard."

Kristoff chuckled. At that moment there was a knock at the door and a familiar shock of jet-black hair poked into their office.

"Hey there, lovebirds."

"Hey Neil." Elsa replied, trying to hide the strain in her voice. "What's up?"

"I heard there was a break-in at your witness' place?"

Elsa eyed him warily. "How did_ you_ hear about that?"

He laughed. "Oh, I had a chat with Dave from forensics. He told me you were there. Just wanted to make sure everything's alright."

Elsa smiled. "Yeah, I've got it under control. Thank you for asking, though."

He hesitated. "Um, would like to get a beer or two after work?"

Elsa chuckled. "Thank you, but no. I'm just about to keel over from the case and Sobel being a pain in the ass, I need some time alone. We'll definitely do something soon, though. I'll come find you when I have time, okay?"

Neil smiled. "It's alright, don't worry about it. How about you, Kristoff?"

"Uh, sure, why not? I get off at five, you?"

"Same here. Let's meet in the lobby."

"Alright, See ya later, Neil."

"Bye, lovebirds."

And with that he was gone.

Kristoff chuckled. "Well, at least it's just drinks and no dinner now. You think he's finally catching on?"

"I sure hope so. I've shot him down more often than I can count in the past three years. I kinda feel bad about it, I mean he really tries to be sweet and all, but he's just not my type."

"Too clingy?"

"Too male" she replied with a chuckle. "Now, let's get some work done. Has the report from Dave come in yet?"

Elsa glanced at her watch. 10 AM. Only seven more hours until she got out of this hellhole.

* * *

**hey guys. you get another early chapter, consider it a christmas gift :)**

**i had a blast writing this chapter, and i hope you enjoy it as well**

**still looking for a beta btw**

**reviews/suggestions/feedback as always encouraged and appreciated**

**peace out and merry christmas to y'all!**


	5. Remembrance

Anna was standing at the entrance to the main campus building, nervously fiddling with the straps of her backpack. Today had been a mess. Still scared and exhausted from the night's events, she had dozed off several times during the lectures, only to jolt awake again when her head slipped off the hand it as resting on. Suffice to say that she had absolutely no idea what today's lectures were about. She glanced at her watch again. Ten past five.

_'I hope she comes soon. I mean, ten minutes, it's not that much, right? And she said on the phone that she might be a bit late. Yeah, she did. But what if she has to work overtime because they found an important lead? No, she would've called me then to let me know. What if she had an accident? Oh calm down, will ya? Ten minutes late in rush hour is like half an hour early. She'll probably be here at six or something. Should I get something to eat in the meantime? I'm really hungry. But what if she wants to cook dinner tonight, and I can't eat anything because I've already had a snack here? That would be so rude. Wow, from 'ten minutes late' to 'dinner with the hot detective', how did that happen. Wait, hot detective? How did _that _happen?!'_

She was thrown back into the real world by a laugh coming from her side. She turned to see Elsa standing next to her, obviously amused.

_'Shit! How long have I been out? How long has she been standing there? She's thinking I'm an airhead now, just a stupid girl with big dreams that will end up as a waitress in some grimy diner. Which will probably happen anyway, I mean, what are the chances that I ever get elected into any kind of office? 'Vote Keller 2020, stimulating the economy by breaking everything she touches and having to replace it.' That actually doesn't sound too bad. The Vote Keller 2020 part, I mean. Not the rest. That's not good at all.'_

"Am I really so hideous that you have to escape into your dreamworld?" Elsa said in a mock hurt voice, forcing her out of her thoughts again. She blushed furiously.

"Um, hi, I...no, oh god no, please don't think that you're ugly, you're gorgeous! Wait, what? That came out wrong. Not that you're not gorgeous, I mean you most _definitely_ am, but I shouldn't have said that and now I feel really stupid, and...yeah...right about now would be the appropriate time for the ground to open up and swallow me whole, please?"

She looked at her feet, her face almost as red as her hair, but she couldn't help the smile that tugged at her lips when she heard Elsa's wholehearted laughter.

"You know, you're really cute when you drift off and then ramble like a wind-up toy, but I just hope you won't do that while holding a speech at the Senate. Not even your extraordinary cuteness would help you there."

_'She thinks I'm cute. Seriously? No, she was being honest! I can already hear the bells chime. Wait, _what?! _You're not even into women! Okay, well sort of. But you just met her a few days ago! And you're a witness in her case, there's gotta be some rules and regulations about that. Shit, she's said something. You're doing it again! Snap out of it! Now!'_

"I don't have a girlfriend." she blurted. _'Oh my god. Abort! Abort! Where are the lifejackets on this thing?'_

"Come again?" Elsa said, truly confused now.

"I, um, I...could we please just get going before I have to lie down and die of embarrassment?"

Elsa chuckled. "Sure thing, Anna." She motioned to where her car was parked.

"You know, I would never have believed your face could actually match your hair color. Gives a whole new meaning to 'redhead'."

Anna stumbled and almost fell down the stairs if Elsa hadn't caught her.

"Gotcha!" she said. "Okay, no more jokes while you're walking down stairs. Or maybe walking in general." A sly smirk graced her features.

Anna hadn't registered a single word that had left Elsa's mouth. All of her attention was focused on those lips moving, then forming into a grin. Those lips, mere inches away. She really wanted to lean in and capture them with her own, savoring their taste, wallowing in their softness. Those lips, now in a frown.

"Are you alright?" Elsa asked, concern in her voice.

"Uh, yeah, I'm...I just...the day has been really long and...why is it so hot all of a sudden? It's early October, it shouldn't be this hot outside, right? It's like eighty degrees, that can't be right."

Elsa just shook her head, smiling again. "So adorable." she mumbled to herself. "Well, let's just get to the car so you can sit down and not have to worry about your legs, because I think your mind is preoccupied right now."

"Y-yeah, that sounds like a plan."

They reached the car without further incident, and Anna was proud to actually manage to keep her mouth shut. She couldn't help the nervous fiddling around with the seatbelt, though.

Elsa soon noticed her distress, and spoke up. "Wanna hear some awesome Norwegian music?"

"Yes, duh. What a question." she replied with a laugh.

Elsa switched from station to CD playback, and immediately loud guitars, drums and screaming came blaring out the speakers. To her own surprise, Anna actually liked the music, although she suspected she did so mainly because Elsa liked it.

"I don't understand most of it, but it's just about drinking and women, right?"

Elsa laughed. "Pretty much, yes. Do you like it?"

"Yes! It sounds really good! What are they called?"

Elsa smiled, obviously pleased that Anna liked her music. "Kvelertak. One of the few heavy Norwegian bands that are, like, legally allowed to _not_ be just Black Metal." She laughed.

Anna joined in her laughter. "Yeah I know. Gotta burn down at least two churches or you're just a poser, right?"

Their banter went back and forth from Norwegian music to Norwegian cuisine (lutefisk. ew. but the meatballs are delicious!) to Norwegian landscape (so gorgeous!) to Texan landscape (it's greener than you think! really beautiful) to Minnesotan landscape (there's like, a million places nobody has ever set foot in) to Minnesotan winter (so beautiful, but you better bring another butt because yours will freeze off), and before they knew it they had spent over an hour talking in the parked car in the underground garage. Elsa glanced at the watch and saw with a shock that it was well past 7 PM.

"Well, we better get inside, don't you think?"

Anna nodded and they both got out of the care and went for the elevator.

* * *

Elsa led her to a plain white door with the number 31 on it, anticipation building as her imagination ran wild about what Elsa's apartment would look like.

The hallway was as could be expected: a coat-rack by the door, a small cabinet with a bowl for keys. Two doors leading into as of yet unexplored rooms. It opened into a spacious living room. Anna drank in her surroundings. The walls were unadorned, not a single picture or painting anywhere in sight. There was a lot of white. White walls, white furniture. The arrangement was precise. The white couch stood the perfect distance from the large flatscreen TV resting on a small cabinet, a snug little coffee table in between. A small stereo nestled into a corner. The dining table a little ways off, surrounded by matching chairs, close to the open doorway which, she presumed, lead into the kitchen. The whole room was full of straight lines and sharp angles. To Anna the room seemed sober, austere even. The only color came from the backs of books, filling several shelves at the back wall, flanking a large window. She made a mental note to go exploring those shelves at the earliest opportunity.

Only after a while Anna started to pick up the small things that hinted at someone actually living there. A book with a marker resting on the coffee table. Remotes haphazardly strewn across the couch. A tall, half-burned down candle on the dining table. What caught her attention was one shelf that differed from the others. She went over there to inspect it more closely.

On it, there rested a small plush cat square in the middle, a few mementos on both sides. Coins from a currency she didn't recognize, a heart-shaped locket without a necklace, a keychain with a die on it. Behind it lay the bow of a violin, and leaning against the back of the shelf she saw an envelope, addressed only to J. A thick layer of dust coated the shelf, a stark contrast to the otherwise spotless room. Anna felt a lump in her throat. It was like a little shrine, undisturbed for who knows how many years, and she felt like an intruder.

She suddenly felt an urge to touch something. She knew she shouldn't, but her hand moved on it's own accord. It reached for the locket, taking it off the shelf. Opening it, she saw the picture of a young Asian woman, somewhere in her late teens. She had beautiful straight hair, and a bright smile graced her lips. Dark eyes looked at her, full of live and optimism, innocent and unaware of the cruelties of the world. Now she had an image of the person that had managed to steal Elsa's heart away, still holding it captive long after her death. "You're beautiful" she whispered.

"Yes, she was."

Anna whirled around to see Elsa leaning against the corner of another hallway, changed into more comfortable clothes. Her voice hadn't been harsh, accusing or reprimanding; rather full of affection, with a hint of hundreds of words that remained unsaid. Her expression was soft, a small smile on her lips, but a deep sadness in her eyes that almost strangled Anna. She felt like she had committed a capital crime. She had invaded Elsa's most personal space, had desecrated this place of remembrance, tainted it for all eternity.

"Elsa..." Words caught in her throat. "I'm so...so sorry. God, I'm such an asshole, you invite to your home and first thing I do...I'm terrible." She felt her lip starting to tremble.

Elsa just shook her head and walked over to her. She gently took the locket Anna was still holding, looking at it for a few moments. In a span of not even two seconds, Anna saw so much raw emotion in Elsa's eyes. Love and grief, comfort, happiness and such a profound sadness she had never experienced in her life. The blonde closed the locket and gingerly placed it back onto the shelf, right into the heart-shaped imprint in the dust. Her fingers remained for a few seconds, almost in reverence, and when her hand moved away it looked like the shelf had never been disturbed.

The silence between them became heavier and heavier, threatening to crush Anna. She felt the need to say something, to apologize, to comfort, _anything_.

"Elsa, I..." Elsa just laid a finger on her mouth, and Anna died. Died and went to heaven. Just a split second before, Anna would have done anything to escape this situation, but now she never wanted it to end. The finger on her mouth felt like the first sunbeam on skin after a night that lasted a lifetime.

"It's okay, Anna." Elsa said, barely audible. "It's okay."

When she took her finger away, Anna felt like a limb of her own had been torn off. The world looked desaturated. All the colors had lost their shine. All except the blue of Elsa's eyes. She stared into those eyes, drinking their color, stripping down to her soul in a mad desire to show them her very essence. She didn't know how long they stood there, unmoving, looking into each others eyes. It could have been five seconds or ten years.

It was Elsa who eventually broke their gaze. She turned her face and looked at the shelf again, prompting Anna to do the same.

"It's all hers" she said. "Little gifts she gave me over the months. The plush cat was the very first one, even before we were a couple. She was so shy about it, afraid that I'd find it stupid and laugh at her." She chuckled.

"Those coins are 3041 yen. Her dad had brought them back from a visit to his family in Japan, and I liked how exotic they looked, especially the 50 yen-coin, with the hole in the middle. She just gave them to me and said that I would have more fun with them than she."

"The chain was actually her own, but she gave it to me when she saw that I had only like two keys on my keyring and nothing else, and she decided that this was an affront to all of humanity. I never actually put it on my keyring but on a necklace instead. That prompted her to give me the locket on our six month-anniversary. I remember feeling so bad about it because I hadn't gotten her anything, I was close to tears. She just held me in her arms and said that the greatest gift to her would be that I wear it every day until she dies. I haven't worn it since then."

Anna tried to swallow the lump in her throat, feeling her eyes misting over. _'Don't you dare start crying now! She's telling you probably her deepest, most intimate memories. Whatever you do don't cry you sentimental idiot!'_

Elsa was quiet now, seemingly lost in her memories. "I'm sure you're wondering about the violin bow." she said suddenly, almost startling Anna.

"Um, yes?" she responded. _'Yes, great, just show her how very _not_ sophisticated you are. At least you didn't throw up.'_

Elsa smiled. "I know it's a bit cliché, the Asian kid playing a classical instrument, but she really loved it. And she was so good at it. She could play anything, from Mozart to Schubert to Chopin. I would sometimes spend hours just listening to her, watching her sway to the music with her eyes closed. She particularly loved to play Beethoven's moonlight sonata. It's a somber piece, but she always made it sound so hauntingly beautiful"

She fell silent for a few moments, as if to collect her thoughts. "Then one day, and I remember it as if it were yesterday, she played a piece I didn't recognize. It was unlike anything I had ever heard her play before. It was...intricate and yet simple, uplifting and...hopeful, for lack of a better term. I was entranced. When she asked me whether I liked it I told her that I loved it, and asked her what it was called. She simply said 'Elsa'. She had composed it, just for me. She never wrote it down, or if she did I didn't find it, and I haven't heard it in nine years." She took a deep breath. "After the funeral, I asked her parents if I could keep a few mementos from her room. The only thing I took was her violin. It's sitting in it's case in my room, and I put the bow here. To never forget that beautiful song."

Anna couldn't keep back her tears any longer, but she didn't want Elsa to see. She turned and almost ran to the couch, sitting down and burying her face in her hands. She felt Elsa siting down next to her, putting an arm around her shoulder.

"Are you okay?"

Anna almost laughed at the question. "No. Yes. I don't..."

She looked at Elsa's face, concern evident.

"I should be asking you that question." she said, sniffling.

Elsa smiled, and pulled her in for an embrace. "I'm okay, Anna"

They sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying each other's company. Anna felt safe and, strangely, at home. Like this was exactly where she belonged. The realization should have shocked her, rocked her world to the very core, but she simply felt content.

After a while, however, her curiosity began eating away at her. She desperately wanted to ask that one question she knew she shouldn't ask. It made her uneasy, and she was afraid Elsa would kick her out or ignore her for the rest of her life. The blonde noticed her squirming, however.

"A penny for your thoughts." she said lightheartedly.

She gathered all of her courage. "Elsa, um, I want to ask you something. You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I would totally understand."

Elsa smiled. "Just ask already." Despite her light tone, Anna could feel her tense up.

She raised her head and looked Elsa in the eyes. "How, um, how did she die?"

The blonde sighed. "I knew that question would come."

"You don't have to answer, really, I'm just as nosy and inappropriate as always."

"It's alright Anna. I just...I don't think I can talk about that right now. I hope you understand."

"Of course! It's really not a big deal. I mean, of course it is, I didn't mean to imply anything, I was just curious, you know, and I'm sorry for making you think about it and bringing you down and I'm sure you hate me now."

To her surprise, Elsa laughed. "If I didn't knew better I'd think you do that on purpose, just so I melt away at your cuteness."

Anna blushed furiously and looked at her feet, unsure how to react. Just when she wanted to reply her stomach made an angry growl, and she suddenly realized just how starved she was.

Elsa laughed again, even harder this time. "_That_ you did on purpose, I'm sure of it!"

Anna giggled nervously. "I wish I had that degree of control over the black hole that is my stomach."

Elsa smiled and looked towards the dining table. "Listen," she said, slightly embarrassed, "I actually wanted to cook dinner for us tonight, but I'm absolutely exhausted. Would you mind if we ordered something?"

"Not at all." Anna said with a smirk. "I'd offer to cook, but I guess replacing your burned down kitchen is relatively low on your to-do list."

The blonde chuckled. "Alright, then. How does Pizza sound?"

* * *

After they had both devoured almost an entire Pizza each, Elsa showed her around. The apartment wasn't as big as it looked judging from the living room, which took up a generous amount of space. There was just a small kitchen, a bathroom, two bedrooms and a little office space where Elsa occasionally did some work from home.

Elsa took a quick shower while Anna stored away her few belongings, and almost squealed with delight when she found that Elsa had somehow found the time do deposit a box of oreos on the pillow of her bed.

Half an hour later Elsa was lying on her bed, dead-tired but unable to sleep. Her mind was in overdrive, running at a thousand miles per hour.

_'Why am I doing this? Why am I falling for her? I shouldn't. I mustn't. Yet here I am, thinking about her when I should be sleeping. She's so cute. And gorgeous. God how I'd love to peel her out of those pants...no, don't go there. It's not fair. She's trusting me. I'm an authority figure, and I shouldn't abuse that trust to exploit her for my base needs. But is it just that? I haven't felt this alive since...since Julia. But that's just that. Am I really falling for _her_, or just the ghost I'm seeing in her? They're so similar, so full of life and hope and expectations. And so compassionate! I would never have expected her to start crying, over my little sob story no less. And she's just next door! Sleeping like a baby, I'm sure. How cute she must look when she sleeps. Probably drooling all over the place...'_

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock. Anna opened the door and peeked her head in.

"Elsa? Are you asleep?" she whispered.

The blond sat up. "Yes, Anna, I'm sleep-talking right now." she said with a chuckle.

"Oh, quiet you." Anna shot back, sticking her tongue out.

"Did you need something?" Elsa asked.

"Um, yes actually. I...I have trouble falling asleep. You wouldn't have anything I could take?"

'_You too?_' Elsa thought, getting up. "Yeah, in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. I'll show you. You could have taken your roommate's stuff, though." She added with a smile.

Anna frowned at that. "My...roommate's stuff? What do you mean?"

"Um, she had a bottle of sleeping pills in her room."

Anna's frown deepened. "Nicole?! No, you must be wrong. She doesn't _believe_ in pills, she doesn't even take that homeopathic crap."

Elsa stopped dead in her tracks. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. She always teases me when I take an aspirin for my headaches, saying how I'm just a pawn of Big Pharma and stuff."

Elsa ran back to her room and started frantically digging through her closet, searching for clothes.

"Wait, what's going on?" Anna asked.

"Get dressed, Anna, and get your keys. We need to get to your apartment right now!" Elsa replied as she hopped into a pair of jeans.

"What? Why all of a sudden?"

Elsa stopped and looked her in the eye. "I saw a bottle sleeping pills in her room, and if it's not hers like you say..."

Anna's eyes widened in shock. "He could have left it there."

She rushed to get her clothes. Elsa, already fully dressed, grabbed her phone and dialed Kristoff's number.

"Come on, pick up you fuck! So help me god if you've put your phone on silent again..."

After redialing three times, finally someone answered.

"Finally! Krist...who are you?...Never mind, I need Kristoff, right now!...Kris, get to the station as soon as possible! Wake up someone from forensics, I need something analyzed ASAP...I'll explain later, just do it, okay?...Thanks, bye."

She hung up and grabbed the badge and gun resting on a dresser in her room. Anna was waiting at the door, a bit intimidated. "Do you really think I should come along? What if I, like disturb evidence or something like that?"

"Don't worry, you'll be fine." Elsa replied, bending down to grab the forensics-kit she kept next to her front door. She was glad she always tried to be prepared.

"Let's go" she said, throwing the door shut behind her.

* * *

An hour later, Elsa burst through the door in her office, startling a clearly sleep-deprived Kristoff.

"What's going on, Els?"

She ignored him and violently tore open a drawer in her filing cabinet, digging through folders and fishing out photographs and other documents. Anna was standing in a corner of the room, looking lost. Elsa stared at the photographs, completely blocking out everything else. Only when Kristoff harshly yanked at her arm and turned her around did she even acknowledge his presence.

"Will you please tell me what the _fuck_ is going on, Elsa?!"

"We found a bottle of sleeping pills in Nicole's room!"

He looked at her as if she had completely lost her mind. "So what?"

"Anna said she doesn't take pills, not even aspirin. Now look!" she demanded, pointing at the photographs. They showed medicine bottles, each found at the home of a different victim.

Kristoff stifled a yawn. "They're some cheap knock-off sleeping pills, so what?"

"Don't you see?! They're all the same, all sold in the same fucking pharmacy!"

When her words had finally sunk in, his eyebrows disappeared into his hairline.

"You mean..."

"Yes! We finally have our common denominator. That pharmacy" she pointed at the logo on one of the pictures, "is where he bought those pills! I'm sure they have video surveillance, if we're lucky we can get a license plate. Or maybe an employee remembers him. I knew he'd slip up eventually. I knew it!"

Kristoff took a closer look at one of the photographs. "Hm, Three Brothers 24/7 Pharmacy. That sounds familiar."

He returned to his desk and started typing away. "You won't like this. It got busted a few years ago for under the counter sale of prescription drugs, massive amounts. I'm talking wholesale. Apparently it was a front for the triads or something. And those sleeping pills were popular. We still got tons of the stuff in our evidence room."

"Damn it!" She went over to to look at his screen. "Proprietor: Arthur Wilson. He doing time?"

Kristoff looked it up. "Nope. He got tipped off and high-tailed out to Mexico. Current whereabouts unknown.

"Shit. Well, there's still a lot to look into. Let's go through all known affiliates and customers. Maybe we get lucky and our guy is among them."

They went digging through case files in silence, until Kristoff spoke up again. "I think I've got something. Here, Darren Townsend, out of Greenwich, NY. Got sentenced to two years on probation in relation to the bust, for illegal possession of prescription drugs. Mainly, those sleeping pills. Unfortunately there's no DNA on record to compare with that we have on the Iceman. Think he's our guy?"

Elsa looked at the mugshot. "He sure is ugly enough. Difficult to tell without the beard, though. Let's see if Anna recognizes him. Anna, could you..." She trailed off when she looked up and saw Anna slumped into a chair, fast asleep.

Elsa smiled and walked to her, rousing her gently.

"Anna? Could you help us out real quick?"

The redhead nodded sleepily and walked over to Kristoff's desk.

"Could that be our man?"

Anna scrunched up her face in concentration. "Maybe, I'm not sure. It's hard to tell without the beard. But the nose looks the part." She paused for a bit. "I think it's him, but I'm not a hundred per cent sure."

Kristoff clapped his hands. "That's enough for me! I'll get a search warrant as quickly as I can. A judge still owes me a favor." He smirked. "Anyway, you guys should head home and get some sleep in. Either Melissa or I will call you when we get the warrant, Elsa."

"Melissa?" the blonde asked.

"Oh right, you don't know." Kristoff said, blushing slightly. "She's the girl that picked up the phone. Remember when I got tripped and bumped into her when I did my little victory dance?"

Elsa rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless. "Only you could send someone flying on their ass and manage to get them into bed. Good job, she's cute! You go, pretty boy."

He laughed. "Thanks. Well, you should really get going. Try to sleep in, I'll smooth things over with Stalin if he gets bitchy."

"Thanks." Elsa replied. "Oh right, I still haven't given you your key, Anna." She rummaged through a drawer in her desk. "I have a spare in here somewhere, but it seems like it's gone AWOL. Never mind, I'll just have a new copy made."

Anna just stood there, nodding when she heard her name, too sleep-deprived to comprehend what was said. They arrived home half an hour later and Elsa fell into her bed, slowly drifting off to sleep.

* * *

**08/22/15: changed some minor things to make the plot go a little smoother. whoever spots the changes wins one free internet :D  
**

**peace out**


	6. Breakthrough?

Elsa was rudely yanked out of her dreams, or nightmare rather, by someone intensely shaking her shoulder.

"Elsa! Wake up!"

Out of reflex the blonde threw a punch at her assailant, and only when it was too late to stop did she recognize Anna's voice. The redhead staggered and fell square on her ass. Elsa's eyes went wide.

"Oh my god, Anna! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to!" She jumped out of bed and knelt down next to Anna, trying to see if she was okay. The redhead looked more shocked than hurt.

"Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" She wanted to wrap her arms around the girl sitting before her, but she didn't dare. She was too afraid Anna would reject her.

"Wow. You really have a mean right hook." Anna said, slowly raising a hand to her cheek.

"Don't touch it. I'll go get some ice, stay where you are!"

When she returned from the kitchen with a bag of ice, Anna was sitting on her bed. She sat down next to the redhead and carefully pressed the ice against her cheek. Anna winced when she felt the cold on her throbbing face.

"That will leave a bruise, won't it?" she asked.

Elsa looked at the floor, deeply embarrassed. "I'm afraid so." she replied. "But why were you trying to wake me up?" She hoped it didn't sound like an accusation.

"I went to the bathroom, and when I was about to go back to bed, I heard you calling for help. I went to check on you and you were just thrashing around and I could see you were having a bad dream. I just...wanted to help you, I guess." she said with a blush.

"And as thanks you get a shiner." Elsa said dejectedly.

Anna held her hand under Elsa's chin and turned her head, looking her in the eyes.

"You didn't do it deliberately. It's okay."

Elsa managed a smile. "Still. I'll make it up to you, somehow."

Anna was staring into her eyes with an intensity that made her uneasy. Slowly, she moved her hand from Elsa's chin to her cheek.

"I know just the thing." she murmured, and before Elsa could react the redhead leaned in, eyes closed, and pressed a kiss to her lips.

Elsa's mind went blank. The only thing that existed was Anna, with her lips pressed against hers. The feeling was indescribable, those weren't butterflies fluttering but eagles soaring in her stomach. It was far too soon when Anna pulled away again, and she felt all warmth leave her body when she saw an expression of utter terror in her wide-open eyes.

"I...oh god, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have... I..."

Elsa wanted her to stop apologizing, and shut her up the only way she could think of. Cupping her uninjured cheek, she fiercely smashed their lips together, eliciting a small moan from Anna. A hungry tongue pushed its way through half-opened lips, and finally Anna began reciprocating the kiss. The bag of ice, long forgotten, landed on the floor and Elsa moved her now free hand behind Anna's back, pulling her closer. Only the need to breathe made them break apart.

"Elsa..." the redhead whimpered.

"Stop apologizing." Elsa murmured with a smirk and kissed her again, gentler this time.

Anna shifted her weight and leaned back, pulling Elsa half on top of her. She gasped when Elsa placed a hand on her waist and slowly slid it beneath the hem of her nightshirt. The blonde hesitated, unsure if she pushed too far too fast, but Anna grabbed her wrist and moved her hand further upwards, inviting her to explore. And explore she did, letting her fingers wander over Anna's incredibly smooth skin, feeling toned muscles tensing under her touch.

Only when she brushed the underside of Anna's bare breast did she realize that the redhead wasn't wearing a bra. She paused again, afraid of scaring Anna away. The redhead broke their kiss and gave an annoyed sigh.

"You know, for a drop-dead gorgeous, badass detective you're pretty shy about this." she teased.

Elsa chuckled and leaned in for another kiss, but for the briefest of moments she saw black instead of red, hazel instead of teal. She froze in mid-motion. _'Julia?!'_ She backed away, and after a few tense moments fled out of the bedroom.

Anna found her a few minutes later, sitting on the couch. The redhead slowly sat down, conscious to give Elsa the space she needed.

"Did I...say something wrong?" she asked quietly.

Elsa was quiet for a while, thinking. "No." she said. "You didn't say or do anything wrong. I just...I don't know what happened."

Silence again.

Elsa heard Anna take a deep breath, and somehow she knew what she was going to say.

"Listen, Elsa, I know we've known each other for, like, five days, and it's probably way too soon to say this but...I like you. A lot. When I'm close to you I just feel...at home, safe. Like I belong. And I've never felt like that before in my entire life."

Elsa smiled and turned her head to look at Anna. "It's crazy to say this, but I feel the same way. Just being around you makes me happy. This," she laid a finger on the redhead's lips, "is the most alive I've felt in nine years. And I think I'm falling for you, Anna. Hard. But..."

She paused to take a deep breath, steeling her nerves. She knew leaving that 'but' hanging in the air for so long wasn't fair for Anna. Elsa was just afraid of the redhead's reaction to what she would say next.

"But I don't know if it's for the right reasons." Elsa finally said, opening her other hand and revealing the heart-shaped locket she had been holding the entire time.

"It's uncanny how much you remind me of her sometimes. You're both so optimistic and caring, full of life and hope for the future. Have I told you what she wanted to study after high school?"

Anna only shook her head in response.

"Medicine. She wanted to go into research and try and find a cure for AIDS. Not because she'd lost someone close to her to the disease. I don't think she even personally knew anybody suffering from it. But she wanted to help people. And what I've seen from you these past few days, you are the same." She paused, taking another breath. "I want to be with you, Anna, I can't even begin to describe how much I want to. But I don't know if I'm drawn to you, or the past I never had that I see in you. I've been with so many women over the years that I couldn't recall half of them, even if I wanted to. I've _used_ them for a quick high, just to forget for a few hours. Most of these girls were probably after the same, but I just know a few of them were hoping for more. And I hurt them, disappointed them. I don't want to do that to you."

She fell silent and waited, in equal parts anticipation and dread, for Anna's response.

The redhead grasped the hand holding the locket, and cupped Elsa's cheek with her other hand.

"I understand." she said softly looking into her eyes. "I know you're probably scared or feeling guilty, but you don't need to. I may be a lot like her," she squeezed the hand holding the locket, "but I am not her. And even if that familiarity is what has drawn you to me in the beginning, I don't think it's all I am to you. I appreciate your concern, but not giving me, _us_, a chance because of your past and what might happen would hurt me just as much."

Elsa leaned over and rested her head in the crook of Anna's neck. "Thank you." she murmured. "You're so sweet all the time, and I want this to work. It just feels unfair, burdening you with my past."

Anna started gently stroking her hair. "Stop talking like that _right now_. I want you, all of you. The whole package. And that includes your history. If it means I get to be with you in the present, I have absolutely no problem helping you deal with your past."

Elsa wrapped an arm around Anna's waist, enjoying the silence. After a few minutes, she spoke up again. "Are you really sure about this? About me?"

Anna scoffed. "Am I sure that I won't trip over my own feet and break my neck tumbling down a flight of stairs today? Of course not. But if I waited for the perfect moment I'd never get going. I can't look into the future, but I want to try and make it as beautiful as possible."

Elsa processed what Anna had said, sitting in silence for a while.

"I just want to make sure we both don't get burned by this..._us_. I want to take it slow. Is that okay with you?" Worry was plain in her voice.

Anna chuckled and tangled her hands in Elsa's blonde hair. "You're worth the wait." she simply replied. "Making out now and then wouldn't hurt, though." she added with a chuckle.

Elsa sighed and wished she could stop time. She never wanted this moment to end, to stay snuggled up to Anna and, despite all, feel content. Reality had different plans, however, and their moment was interrupted all too soon by Elsa's phone ringing in her bedroom. She groaned and pushed herself up.

"That's Kristoff's ringtone. Probably about that warrant. I'll be right back."

She went to her bedroom and retrieved the phone.

"Hey Kris...okay, I'll get to the station in, say, an hour?...Great, see you then."

She went to the bathroom for a quick shower and got dressed. When she returned to the living room, ready to head out, Anna was lazily zapping through the channels on the TV.

"I'm going to the station now." Elsa said from behind, prompting Anna to turn around. "Depending on how things go I could be home late. Will you be okay on your own?"

Anna giggled and gestured at the remote. "I have a big-ass TV with a million channels at my disposal, not to mention the myriad of books you own. I'll keep myself occupied. "

Elsa smirked and turned towards the door. She hesitated for a moment, then removed a key from her ring.

"I'm leaving that with you, since I haven't had time yet to get a spare one. You know, in case you wanna head out or something. Call me if something comes up." She turned around again and headed out.

* * *

"I don't like this at all." Kristoff said, looking at a file on his screen. "AR-15, half a dozen handguns...are you sure we shouldn't let SWAT handle this one?"

Elsa frowned. "It's just a search warrant, besides you know how these guys are just great at destroying evidence. Wouldn't hurt to have them on stand-by though, just in case."

She sighed and pulled a bulletproof vest over her head, silently cursing herself for not thinking of wearing a more loose-fitting shirt today while she buttoned it back up again. She put her Glock 19 in its holster, grabbing two extra magazines for good measure. Better safe than sorry. Stuffing her radio in her pocket, she did one last check on her equipment. Dealing with people who had such an impressive amount of registered firearms always made her nervous. It was impossible to know what kind of unregistered weapons they might have.

Kristoff made the call to request a heavy rescue truck on stand-by in the general area while they made their way to her car. The drive was unusually quiet and made Elsa anxious. She had a bad feeling about this.

* * *

They slowly walked up towards the front door, wary of any signs that something might be out of the ordinary. The house itself was what you'd expect from a suburb, single-story with a somewhat messy front lawn. Elsa took a deep breath before knocking on the door. When no one answered, she knocked again.

"Mr. Townsend, this is the NYPD. We have a search warrant, please open the door."

Everything remained quiet. Kristoff anxiously raised his hand to the gun in its holster, and Elsa had to fight the urge to do the same. She moved to the side to peek through one of the narrow windows beside the door. She barely had enough time to raise her arm before her face when the glass shattered and the impact sent her staggering backwards, falling off the porch. Everything went black for a few moments.

"...down, repeat, officer down!"

_'Why is he sounding so agitated? Oh, right...'_ She groaned and patted herself down. A surge of relief washed through her when she felt the bullet embedded in her vest. She knew it would leave a nasty bruise on her chest, but the gallons of adrenaline coursing through her bloodstream blocked out the pain. For now.

"Motherfucker." she cursed through clenched teeth, propping herself up on her elbows.

"Elsa, stay down! Are you okay?"

She just gave him a thumbs-up and started crawling towards the edge of the house, to get out of immediate danger. Leaning on the wall she slowly stood up and took a deep breath to calm her nerves. Kristoff made his way to her side, careful to avoid any windows.

"I've called for backup, the cavalry will be here in five to eight minutes." he whispered into her ear.

"Yeah, and he'll be long gone by then" She hissed, drawing her gun. "Watch the front door, I'll make sure he doesn't leave out back!"

Kristoff grabbed her arm and tried holding her back, but she shook it off.

"I'm _not_ letting that bastard escape! Now watch the goddamn door!"

Elsa took off around the side of the house, ducking beneath any windows that lay on her path. Once at the back of the house, she pressed her back against the wall next to the closed door, ready to take anyone down trying to make a run for it. She risked a peek through the small window in the door, and could see the silhouette of a man kneeling behind a couch, rifle trained towards the front door. Seeing an opening, she slowly edged her way towards a window and raised her weapon, taking aim. Just as she was about to pull the trigger she bumped into a rusty grill, the sound making him swirl around. Her shot hit the couch and nothing else.

Cursing, the man turned around fully and let loose a salvo towards the window before sprinting for a doorway. Elsa more heard than felt the bullet entering her arm, looking in disbelief at the hole in her sleeve that was quickly turning red. '_Shit!_'

That was the last straw. Shooting caution into the wind she kicked down the door, running into what looked like a dining room and taking cover next to the open door leading into what she presumed was the living room. She glanced around the corner and saw the door the suspect had run to, still half-open. Slowly she crept up to it, gun raised but unfortunately in the wrong hand. Still, she was determined to end this right now. Just as was she was reaching for the doorknob with her injured hand, the door flew open with a force that surprised her, knocking the gun out of her hand. She stumbled backwards with a surprised yelp and fell onto her ass once again, and when she looked up she stared into the barrel of a rifle aimed for her head, malicious eyes glistening behind it.

"Goddamn commie bastards!" the man yelled, and Elsa shut her eyes, waiting for the inevitable. A flash of red hair and teal eyes went through her mind when she heard the shot, but to her surprise it was the man before her shouting in pain, just in the process of falling to the floor. She looked up to the front door to see Kristoff with his gun trained at the man, and she quickly got up and kicked the rifle away from him. Picking up her own weapon, she took in everything she could about the man writhing in pain on the floor, clutching his right shoulder.

"Elsa! Are you alright?"

Kristoff's concerned voice forced her mind to focus on him. She realized he was staring at her left sleeve, now completely drenched in red. As the shock wore off she started feeling the sting from the wound.

"Yeah," she said through gritted teeth. "I'm the black knight, 'tis but a scratch." she chuckled, despite everything.

They heard sirens howl in the distance. "You tend to that wound, I'll keep this guy in check" Kristoff said. Their radios crackled with static as a voice inquired about their status.

"One suspect down, officer wounded. Building not secure, repeat, not secure." Kristoff replied while Elsa shed her coat and tore off the right sleeve of her shirt. _'I really liked those clothes'_ she thought while pressing the torn-off sleeve to the wound in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

* * *

"Kristoff!" Anna yelled, out of breath. She sprinted the last few steps towards the huge blonde. "How is she? Is she gonna be alright?"

The burly blonde looked at her with an amused grin. "Relax, she's fine. Came out of a surgery a while ago and should be waking up any minute now."

Anna's eyes went even wider. "Surgery? What...what happened?!"she almost shouted.

Kristoff, noticing the glares they received from passing nurses and other patients, tried to shush her. "Will you please calm down? She'll be alright! She got shot in the arm and the bullet was close to the brachial artery, so the docs decided to play it safe and worked it out with general anesthesia."

He noticed her still-worried look, and added "If you want I can take you to her. As I said she should wake up any minute now."

Anna eagerly nodded and fell in step behind him. She gasped when she entered the room and saw Elsa lying on the bed, still unconscious, with a thick bandage on her left arm. Anna quickly rushed to her side and took hold of her right hand, squeezing it tightly.

As if on cue, the blonde slowly opened her eyes. Confused at first, she smiled when her vision focused on Anna. "Hey there, copper head." she whispered with a hoarse voice.

"Elsa." Anna breathed, raising the blonde's hand to her mouth and kissing it gently. "You had me so worried!"

"I'm okay." she replied, still drowsy and a little out of it, but the wince she let out when she tried raising her left arm proved her a liar.

"Easy now, take it slow." Anna said with a crooked smile. She dragged a chair up to the bedside and sat down, taking hold of Elsa's hand again. "What happened?" she asked.

"She got careless, that's what happened." Kristoff said. Only now did Elsa register his presence in the room.

"Oh shut up, you." the blonde replied, rolling her eyes.

"No, Elsa. Today was a mess. You almost got yourself killed for crying out loud!"

"You what?!" Anna shrieked. Elsa winced as the sound pierced her ears.

"Don't listen to him." The blonde slurred, eyes trained firmly on Anna's. "He's blowing this all out of proportion."

Kristoff let out a frustrated sigh. "For heaven's sake, Elsa, the guy had a fucking _rifle_ on your..."

He was cut off by Elsa letting out an angry growl. "If this is all you want to talk about you can wait outside!" she snarled, shooting daggers with her glare.

"Fine!" he huffed, throwing his arms in the air before turning around and skulking out of the room.

Anna squeezed her hand to get her attention once more, worry plain on her face. "Is it true?" she asked.

Elsa sighed and dropped her gaze. "It was closer than I'd have liked." she replied after a few moments. "But I'm alright, and we got the bastard. That's what counts."

"No, Elsa." Anna replied, agitation evident "what counts is that you take care of yourself! I don't - we just started...I don't know, _something_, and then you go and do this! When Kristoff called me and told me you were in the hospital I felt like..."

Her voice trailed off and Elsa looked up to see tears welling up in her beautiful teal eyes. The sight hurt her more than she'd like to admit, knowing she was the cause. Raising her uninjured arm and cupping Anna's cheek, careful to avoid the bruise she had left there earlier that day, she pulled Anna's head down until their foreheads rested together.

"I'm sorry." the blonde whispered, the feeling of Anna's ragged breaths on her lips sending shivers down her spine. "I'll be more careful from now on out, okay? You don't need to worry about me."

"I'll always worry about you." Anna replied with a hoarse voice before pressing a tender kiss to Elsa's lips.

* * *

**hey guys! I'm back! Yay! Well, sort of. I'm currently in the middle of hunting for a new apartment, a new job and may even begin training into a completely different field from what i've done so far. Exciting times! At least in real life, in the fanfiction-world i'm suffering from the dreaded writer's block. Usually, when that happens i'll focus on something completely different for a while, write on some unrelated stuff, usually some drabbles or disjointed ideas for new fics.**

**This time, however, i've been exceptionally busy: i'm sitting on the complete first chapters of three new fics (all elsanna, one medieval sort-of-AU, a post-apocalyptic AU and a modern AU). They won't get posted for a long, long time, i'll only start working on those new fics in earnest once my current fics are finished. Which might take a while, since I still suffer from writer's block. Persistent little bugger.**

**Most of this chapter has actually been written around christmas, but after that the juice kinda left me. I've finished it now and publish it so you guys know that _I haven't abandoned you_. I am still committed to this fic and my other ones, too (summer rains and light bearers). _I WILL definitely finish them_, even if it takes me a year each. I will see it done. Only death can keep me from seeing this through!**

**That said, updates will be irregular at best. It'll probably be about one per month, but I don't want to give any promises I can't keep. The way it is now I can only write when the fancy strikes me, and that is very rarely at the moment. The chapters will come when they come.**

**I hope you liked this chapter, and I hope you'll accept it as an apology for letting you guys in the dark for so long. I'm not worthy of all your awesomeness.**

**Reviews/feedback/suggestions are, as always, very welcome**

**Special thanks goes to ****ComplexStatus**** who kindly acted as a beta on this chapter. You are fucking brilliant!**

**Peace out**


	7. Back to work

"Anna, quit fooling around back there. I need to be at the station in half an hour." Elsa said half amused, half annoyed. In reply, Anna simply blew a raspberry over her shoulder.

"Ew, that's disgusting! You're such a child sometimes."

The redhead merely laughed and continued braiding Elsa's hair. "Well, it was you who insisted on wearing a braid today. You said you needed to look, and I quote, 'impeccable'. And since you still can't do it yourself..."

Elsa merely rolled her eyes and gave an indignant huff. While she didn't have to wear her arm in a sling anymore, thank god, it was still quite sore and she couldn't reach very far behind her back or above her head. Which proved to be a challenge in everyday life. She thankfully owned a few bras with the clasp in the front, but still needed Anna's help when putting on t-shirts and tight jackets. And Anna never got tired of reminding her of that.

They had quickly developed a routine in the two weeks since 'the incident', as both of them had taken to calling it. With Elsa unable to do anything that required both hands for prolonged periods of time, it had fallen to Anna to handle a surprising amount of household chores. She had been quite anxious at first, immediately picturing her entire apartment a mess like Anna's room in her shared flat had been, but her girlfriend had surprised her once again and managed to keep the place in tip-top shape, and even managed to cook a few decent meals without starting any kitchen fires.

Oh, and they'd officially started dating. True to their word they were taking it slow and hadn't ventured beyond making out or cuddling during a movie, taking their time to get truly comfortable with one another. Elsa was still incredibly nervous and constantly worried about screwing up one way or another, but Anna slowly eased her out of her shell. One step at a time.

"Well, it's my first day back, and I need to show some people that even getting shot won't keep me down for long. Also, I just like it when you play with my hair."

She caught Anna's blush in the mirror and sent her a warm smile.

"I still don't understand why you have to go back so soon." Anna said, still busy with Elsa's hair, "I mean, you've got like half a year worth of unused holidays saved up, and the docs told you to take it slow. You deserve being pampered for a while."

The blonde sighed. Anna did have a point, and she would have liked spending more time with her. But there was still a killer on the loose. Despite their best hopes, Darren Townsend wasn't the Iceman. He was a member of a doomsday sect and believed in basically every conspiracy theory ever, paired with a general mental instability. He would be going to prison, probably for life, for assault with a deadly weapon, grievous bodily harm with deadly intent and a whole slew of other charges, but the DNA evidence was conclusive: he wasn't responsible for the series of murders.

"You know he's still out there, Anna. I have to find this guy, and bring him to justice. I would love to just ride off into the sunset with you, but I won't rest until this maniac is behind bars."

Anna sighed and rested her head on Elsa's shoulder, putting a quick peck on her neck. "Just...be careful, okay? I don't ever want to have to visit you in a hospital again."

Elsa turned around and caught the redhead in an embrace. "I will, copper head. Don't you worry about that. But I really need to get going now."

Anna reluctantly let go of the embrace, and looked her in the eyes. "Are you sure you can drive with your arm?"

Elsa couldn't help but giggle. "Absolutely. And shouldn't you get ready for school? If I remember your schedule correctly you soon need to leave as well, if you want to make it on time."

Anna groaned and rolled her eyes, but started gathering the things she needed for uni nonetheless. Elsa put on a thick coat and headed for the door, when she was stopped by Anna grabbing her hand, turning her around.

"Take care" the redhead whispered after pressing a kiss on her lips.

Elsa merely smiled in reply and left the apartment.

* * *

Kristoff's eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets when he saw Elsa standing in the door to their office.

"What the hell are _you_ doing here?!"

"Surprise!" Elsa drawled, stifling a laugh at his still flabbergasted expression.

He blinked a few times. "Didn't the doc tell you to take it easy for a few weeks?"

"I _have_ been taking it easy for two whole goddamned weeks." Elsa huffed. "Besides, you weren't exactly forthcoming with any details concerning _our_ case."

Kristoff leaned back in his chair and groaned, rubbing his neck. "Yeah, about that..."

He didn't get to finish as his desk phone started ringing. He picked up and didn't even get out his name before he was interrupted by the other person. "I understand." he finally ground out.

"Sobel?" Elsa asked, face set into a frown.

"Yeah," Kristoff replied, "he wants to see you _at once_." He put a mock emphasis on the last to words.

Elsa rolled her eyes. "Of course. Well, I better haul my ass over to Mordor."

Kristoff chuckled, but it was mirthless. "Before you go in there, I need to tell you something." The seriousness in his tone alarmed her. "Sobel re-assigned our case."

Her eyes widened. "He _what_?!"

"Yeah, he did it two days after we took in Townsend. I was under direct orders not to tell you anything about it. That's why I couldn't tell you anything new about the case, I know just as much as the next cop."

"That fucking asshole!" Elsa's face had taken on an interesting shade of red.

"Please don't do anything rash." Kristoff almost begged. "It's just what he wants."

"Oh, I'm going to give him what he wants!" Elsa spat, storming out of the office. Kristoff jumped out of his chair and ran after her.

"Please, Elsa, take a deep breath and calm down. You know how he is, he'll use anything against you!"

Elsa ignored him and quickened her pace, almost running towards the Captain's office. She quite literally slammed the door in Kristoff's face, if his pained moan was anything to go by.

Sobel looked up from this desk and shot her his most smug grin yet. "Detective McKay, what a _pleasure_ to see you, and so soon after your injury."

"What the _fuck_, Sobel?!" Elsa shouted. She was done holding back her contempt for the slimy creature.

"Now, now, Detective, why don't we all calm down? I'm obligated to tell you that our conversation will be recorded, and used as evidence in the pending hearing concerning your probation-"

"Probation?!" Elsa roared, slamming her fist into his desk.

"Yes, Detective, probation. Your conduct during your visit to Mr. Townsend was less than stellar, and the Internal Affairs Bureau has seen fit to put you on probation after I told them about your other recent..._transgressions_."

Elsa was sure that he'd start masturbating any second now.

"You can kiss my ass, you crooked little shit stain! We finally make some headway and you take away _my_ case? Is your twisted little brain that desperate for a quick fix or are you just plain stupid?!"

He was actually giggling now. "Oh, the IAB will _love_ this. I'm looking forward to the results of the hearing."

Elsa scoffed. "I'm quite sure you are. Actually, I'm gonna spare you the wait and have a talk with them right now. See, you're not the only one who's apt at compiling _dossiers_ about your colleagues. The IAB will have a field day with everything I'm gonna dump into their lap."

She noted with grim satisfaction how his face paled. "Oh yeah, that's right, _Captain_. Every dirty little deal you did in the last three years. Every bribe you took, every gram of coke that conveniently wasn't filed as evidence, every charge against one of your cronies you dropped without even looking at it. If I'm going down, I'm taking you with me!"

He cleared his throat and, without looking her in the eye, said "Regardless, I'll have to confiscate your weapon, and you're limited to office duty pending the result of your hearing." There was a dangerous edge in his voice.

"Like hell I'm just handing my gun over to you," Elsa retorted, "your grimy little fingers won't touch it. I'll have someone from the IAB come over and do all of this straight by the books."

His face was twisted in an ugly grimace, a thick vein bulging on his neck.

"If that's all, I'll have to make that call. You will find me in my office should you need anything."

She started turned away, only to whirl back around. "Oh, and before I forget, I'll take some of my many saved-up vacation days. Does a month sound good to you? How about two? Eh, I'll let you now."

Elsa walked out of the room with her head held high. Kristoff was outside, nervously pacing up and down. As soon as the door slammed shut he was immediately at her side.

"What happened in there? Are you really on probation?"

She just motioned for him to follow, and they made their way back into their office. When Kristoff shut the door, Elsa slumped in her chair and held her face in her hands.

"I'm fucked." she ground out. Kristoff sat in the chair on the opposite side of her desk.

"Is it really that bad?" he asked.

Elsa looked at him with a morose expression. "The way I handled the Townsend investigation was shit, there's no way around it. That alone probably wouldn't warrant a probation, but I'm sure his people at the IAB have gone out of their way to embellish whatever they could. I'll just have to hope there won't be too many of them on the committee at my hearing."

She sighed, straightening her back. "That said, I need to make some calls."

She called every contact at the IAB she knew, doing her level best to keep as much this affair out the hands of the people who were in cahoots with Sobel. It took her all morning and the better part of the afternoon to get the ball rolling, having her testimony taken and her gun confiscated, and she sent any dirt she had collected on the Captain to an IAB officer who she knew hated the man almost as much as she did. The last item on her agenda was a call to the Human Resources Division, taking a proper leave of absence for one and a half months.

After all was said and done she laid her head on her desk, feeling strangely empty, save for the massive headache haunting her temples. She sighed, closing her eyes and just let white noise fill her thoughts. She had done everything she could, and she had to wait. A soft knock on the door had her groaning and sitting up, rubbing her temples, before a muffled "Enter." left her lips.

She sighed in relief when a familiar face walked through the door. He had short, brown hair with an accompanying three-day stubble that, along with his piercing green eyes, made him look quite dashing.

"Hey Jeff."she said with a weak smile, while Kristoff just gave a grunt and a wave. "What brings you to our humble office?"

"That's Sergeant Jeff Moreau to you, Detective." he said with a smile.

"Oh shut up, you. I knew the promotion would go to your head." Elsa replied with a genuine smirk, the first one since she came into work today.

"Well, you're not wrong." he shot back with a chuckle. He shut the door, but didn't advance further into the room, eying them both warily. "This isn't a social call." he said in a low voice. Both Elsa and Kristoff sat a little straighter in their chairs.

"First off, I want to let you know that basically the whole precinct stands behind you, Elsa. Everyone knows that probation is ridiculous, and we all have your back. We're just glad that someone finally had the guts to stand up to that shit stain, as you so eloquently put it."

Elsa groaned and dragged her hand down her face. "I hoped that would stay in that room."

"Shouldn't have been shouting like that, then." he replied with a cheeky grin. "Now, the actual reason why I'm here..."

He hesitated for a moment, as if he fought an internal debate, before taking two quick steps and sitting down in the chair Kristoff had occupied a few hours earlier.

"I don't know if you're aware, but I got assigned to your case. I shouldn't tell you this, but I trust that it won't leave this room: we found Nicole Summers' body today."

Elsa's eyes went wide. "No..." she gasped, hoping against hope that this was just some macabre prank. Unfortunately, reality wasn't that accommodating.

"We were lucky and it hasn't hit the news yet, but the commissioner will release an official statement tomorrow. I know you have some kind of rep with the person that reported her missing, and I figured you should tell them before they hear it in the news."

"I...fuck...thank you, Jeff." Elsa said, head hanging low and hands massaging her temples. "Was it him?" she asked tiredly.

He simply nodded. They fell silent for a while, everyone stuck in their own thoughts. After a few minutes, Jeff stood up.

"If you need anything else..." He let the end of the sentence hang in the air.

Elsa smiled appreciatively. "You already did more than enough, Jeff. Thank you."

"Don't mention it." he replied with a dismissive wave of his hand, before walking out and shutting the door behind him.

She just sat there, impassively staring at her desk. "What am I going to tell Anna?" she murmured, more to herself.

"She still living with you?" Kristoff asked.

"Yeah." Elsa replied, hesitating before she continued: "We're dating now." She couldn't help the blush that took over her face.

Her partner immediately perked up, sending her a beaming smile. "Hey, that's awesome! You go, tiger!" He actually tried to imitate a tiger's roar, and failed miserably. Which got a chuckle out of Elsa.

"Why are we friends again?" she asked, her worries momentarily pushed to the back of her mind.

"Because you're stuck with me." he replied with a smirk.

Elsa smiled, but it slowly faded away as her thoughts centered around Anna again. Specifically, how she was going to break the news to her.

"Hey, shift's ended five minutes ago." Kristoff said. "Wanna grab a beer?"

"No, thanks. I need to head home and find a way to gently break my girlfriend's heart." She tried her best to smile reassuringly when she saw his expression, but she couldn't fool him.

"Elsa, if you need anything-"

She didn't let him finish. "Thanks, Kristoff, but I need to do this alone. You should head home and do something with Melissa."

He looked at her intently before deciding that he wouldn't be able to change her mind. "Alright. Just...take care, okay. Of both of you."

"I will." she replied before gathering her things and heading out of their office.

* * *

**guess who's back...back again**

**okay okay, calm your tits everyone. yes, this is a new chapter; no, i'm not dead, and yes, witness protection WILL be finished. i promised, didn't i?**

**so, now that's out of the way, on to the next point: i'm incredibly, incredibly SORRY for not updating for this long! i'm not one for bullshit excuses, just know that i feel teribly bad for letting all you guys hang out dry. you're amazing, each and every one of you, and i'm unworthy of your attention.**

**in lighter news, chapter 8 is already finished, and chapter 9 well underway. to prevent another 6 month hiatus due to lack of motivation, however, i will strictly adhere to an updating schedule. there's between 5 and 7 chapters left, including the epilogue, and they'll be uploaded every saturday from now on. i hope you're all okay with this.**

**lastly, a big, fat shoutout to _ComplexStatus_, who is my amazing beta and took the time out of her day to proof-read my drivel and make it readable. you should thank her. right now. i'll wait...did it? great!**

**anyway, reviews/feedback greatly appreciated**

**peace out**


	8. Grief

Elsa gingerly shut the door to her apartment, kicked off her shoes and put her coat on a hanger. It was close to 8 PM now, and it was only after the fourth ignored call from Anna that she had given up mindlessly driving through the streets, trying to get her thoughts in order.

The stereo was blasting pop music and she heard the obvious sounds of cooking coming from the kitchen, along with Anna occasionally singing along when she knew a line. She couldn't help but smile at the scene, silently walking to the stereo and turning it down a bit.

Anna peeked her head around the corner and beamed when she spied the blonde standing with her back to her.

"Hey." she called, slowly advancing on her girlfriend. "I didn't know when you'd come back and you didn't answer your phone, so I figured I'd get dinner started. Had a busy day, huh?"

Elsa detected the hesitance in Anna's steps when she neither answered nor turned around.

"Is everything alright?" the redhead asked, coming to a halt a few feet away.

Elsa finally turned around, trying to school her face in nonchalance. "I'm out." she simply replied.

"Out? Out of what?" Anna asked, confusion and slight apprehension in her voice.

"My case got re-assigned. I'm on probation."

"What?!" Anna gasped, closing the gap with two quick strides and enveloping Elsa in a fierce hug. The blonde couldn't help nuzzling her face in the crook of Anna's neck, taking in her scent. It soothed her tumultuous mind.

After a few moments Anna stepped back, and Elsa immediately felt a sense of loss.

"Why are you on probation?" Anna asked softly.

Elsa sighed, knowing she would have to tell her. "The 'incident' was the excuse my Captain had been looking for. He slapped on some bullshit _transgressions_ for good measure, and now I'm confined to office duty until the hearing." With a small smile, she added "Well, I would be, had I not taken six weeks of vacation."

Anna's eyes immediately lit up. "Well, at least _something_ good comes of it. You're going to fight this, though, aren't you?"

Elsa sighed again, moving to the couch and flopping down with little grace. "Of course I am, copper head, it's all in motion. Took me the whole damn day. I don't know what will happen at the hearing, but _his_ ass is going down, no matter what!" Her fierce determination was obvious, despite her tiredness.

Anna sat down on the couch as well, gathering Elsa's head in her lap and running her hand through her hair. "It'll be fine, sunshine, you'll see."

Elsa frowned. "Sunshine?"

The redhead blushed and started fidgeting. "Well, you call me copper head because of my red hair, and your hair reminds of the morning sun, so..." she trailed off, obviously embarrassed.

"Oh, I see how it is." Elsa gently pulled Anna down into a chaste kiss. "I like it." she whispered against her lips after they parted.

Anna smiled and opened her mouth in reply, but scrunched up her face instead. Elsa wondered what was wrong until she too noticed the source of her girlfriend's distress: the unmistakable smell of burning food wafting from the kitchen.

"Shit!" Anna shot up, almost causing Elsa to fall of the couch, and ran into the kitchen. "Oh no, no no no no, please no!"

Elsa got up and followed her to the kitchen, trying and failing to hold back a snigger when she saw that it was pasta, of all things, that Anna had managed to burn.

"Quiet, you!" the redhead said with a glare in her direction.

"It's alright, sweetheart." Elsa said, still fighting down the giggles. "I do appreciate the effort. But I think it'd be better to order something tonight, don't you think?"

Anna nodded, dumping the burned noodles into the trash with a wistful sigh. Pulling out her phone she asked "Well, what are you in the mood for today? I wanted to make some spaghetti, but now I feel more like Chinese."

Elsa, having left the kitchen, didn't even hear Anna talking over her inner monologue.

_'You're stalling. Quit stalling. You have to tell her tonight, or do you want her to hear it from some news anchor who doesn't give two shits about Nicole? Yes, she'll hurt, but there's no way around that. This way you can be there for her, at least.'_

She took a deep breath and turned around to the redhead who was blithely chattering on and on.

"Anna." The tone of her voice made Anna stop dead in her tracks, turning her head and looking at the blonde with obvious trepidation. "There's something else I have to tell you."

She could see the rough swallow traveling down Anna's throat. She smiled nervously, unsure how to react to Elsa's statement. "Wh-what about?"

Elsa motioned to the couch. "Why don't we sit down."

Anna nodded and followed her, settling into the couch with some distance to Elsa. The blonde immediately noticed and scooted closer to her, pulling one of her legs up on the couch and turning her body to fully face Anna.

Elsa took a deep breath. "I don't really know how to say this..." she started, trailing off lamely. It was only with considerable effort that she could keep looking straight into her girlfriend's teal eyes. Steeling herself, she finally got the words over her lips. "It's about Nicole."

Anna immediately perked up at the mention of her roommate's name. "What about her? Have you finally found her?"

Elsa couldn't suppress the pained expression taking over her face. "She...her body was found today."

She could see how her words sunk in, how the tentatively hopeful expression left Anna's face and was replaced by a look so devastated it nearly broke her heart.

"She...she's...dead?" The last word had been so quiet it was barely a whisper.

"I'm so sorry, Anna." Elsa cursed herself. She had never been very good at dealing with such situations, and now that it was her girlfriend sitting in front of her, eyes rapidly filling with tears, she was painfully aware of how useless she was. She hesitantly raised her arms, unsure if it was okay to embrace the redhead, when the first sob wrenched from her throat and she launched herself at Elsa, burying her face in her chest and holding on for dear life.

Elsa, hopelessly overwhelmed, resigned herself to slowly rubbing Anna's back, gently rocking her back and forth. She wished she could say something to somehow ease her pain, but every single thing she could think of sounded shallow and meaningless at best.

"She can't be dead." Anna pushed out between sobs, her whole body shaking. "She can't be. You said..."

She suddenly pushed herself away forcefully, standing up from the couch. Her eyes were puffy and blood-shot, marring her angry face.

'_Wait, angry?_'

"You said you'd bring her back! You promised it to me. You _promised_!" Anna yelled. Elsa was completely dumbstruck, Anna's outburst had caught her wholly unprepared. She slowly got up and made her way to the shaking redhead, trying to take her hand. She felt almost physical pain when Anna yanked her hand away and hissed "Don't _touch_ me!"

Tears shot to her own eyes now. "Anna, please!" she whimpered, unable to wrap her head around the situation. "I...I'm so sorry..."

"Don't say you're sorry!" the redhead angrily retorted, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. "You don't care. No one cared. And now she's _dead_!"

Without another word Anna turned around and positively fled towards her room, slamming the door shut. Elsa stood in the middle of the living room, paralyzed, tears of her own leaving her eyes. She had absolutely no idea how to deal with this.

After what felt like an eternity, she had finally gathered enough courage to approach Anna's door. She could hear muffled sobbing, and no matter what Anna had said, she couldn't leave her alone right now.

"Anna?" she asked hesitantly while knocking the door. When she got no reaction whatsoever, she tried turning the knob, only to find that the door was locked. "Please let me in, Anna."

She held her ear to the wood and even then barely heard the "Go away, Elsa." from the other side.

"Anna, please, I just want to-" she didn't get to finish.

"I don't care!" the redhead yelled. "Just leave me alone."

Elsa felt like a white-hot knife had been plunged into heart. She stumbled back until her back hit the wall and slowly slid down, arms hugging the knees pressed to her chest.

* * *

Elsa sighed dejectedly as she turned around once again, unable to find a comfortable position to fall asleep in. The past one and a half weeks hadn't been easy. Anna had eventually come around and apologized for her reaction, reassuring Elsa that she didn't blame her. If her demeanor since then was anything to go by, though, she had been lying. The redhead had grown cold and distant, shooting down any attempt of consoling and affection, and frequently locked herself in her room for hours at a time. She said that she had to study for school and didn't want to be disturbed, but Elsa could hear the faint crying every time she passed the door.

Now Elsa lay on her bed, the moonlight streaming through the half-drawn curtains faintly illuminating the room. Her eyes fell on the black dress hanging from her closet door, barely visible in the twilight. Nicole's funeral had been today. It had been strange for her, attending the funeral of a victim in one of her cases. She usually kept her distance, knowing that getting too attached was the fastest way to depression and burning out; but when Anna had asked her to accompany her she couldn't refuse. As heinous as it sounded, she was grateful for any amount of time she could spend in her presence. It had even filled her with a morbid sense of joy when Anna had leaned into her, desperately hugging Elsa's arm to her side when the casket had been lowered into the grave.

Now, though, she felt like it was back to square one. The ride back home had been silent, and as soon as they were inside Anna immediately retreated to her room, only coming out to shower and get ready for bed. That had been more than three hours ago, and it was well past midnight. And still, Elsa could find no rest. She was scared, scared that she'd lost Anna before they'd even made a month in their relationship. She didn't know what she could do or say, afraid that anything she said might lead to an argument. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, unable to go neither forward nor back.

She had been in the process of turning around yet again when she heard a faint knock at her door. She thought she'd imagined it until the door slowly opened, and Anna stuck her head inside.

"Elsa?"

Any trace of tiredness left her body when she heard the redhead whisper her name.

"Yes?" she answered in an unsure voice.

Anna entered the room fully, standing in the still-open doorway. "Did I wake you up?"

"No you didn't." She sighed. "I can't sleep."

"Me neither." Anna replied with a chuckle that was devoid of any mirth.

It was silent for a few moments until she spoke up again. "Would you..." She trailed off, clearly anxious about the question she wanted to ask. "Could I stay here tonight? With you?"

Elsa tried to keep her voice even, and not let the relief she felt show, when she answered. "Of course, Anna. Anything you need."

Anna nodded almost imperceptibly and closed the door, making her way to the bed. Elsa scooted all the way to the edge on her side, mindful to give Anna the space she needed.

"What are you doing all the way over there?"

The blonde couldn't help the faint blush that crept onto her cheeks. "I...well I just thought..."

"Do me a favor and don't think. You might hurt yourself." Anna interjected with the first genuine smile in days.

Beneath the shy smile she donned while shuffling closer to Anna, Elsa felt ecstatic. For the first time in what felt like forever, she could imagine a silver lining on the horizon.

"I'll see what I can do." she replied with a chuckle. She came to rest a few inches away from Anna, resisting the impulse to run a hand through copper hair. She didn't want to cross any lines. All that went out the window when Anna softly pushed her shoulder, urging her to lay on her back, and promptly snuggling into her side. Their legs intertwined and Anna rested her head in the crook of Elsa's neck, her right hand drawing lazy circles on Elsa's stomach. They fell into a comfortable silence, simply enjoying their closeness.

After a few minutes, Anna spoke up again. "I'm sorry." she whispered into Elsa's neck. "I'm sorry for how I've treated you these last couple of days. I projected my grief onto you, and you didn't deserve that. You have your own problems and don't need mine added to the pile."

Elsa, who had been slowly shaking her head the whole time, noticed the wetness seeping through her shirt and realized Anna had started crying. She gingerly ran her hand up and down her girlfriend's back while she searched for the right words.

"You don't have to apologize," she finally said,"I understand. I just want you to know that, no matter what happens, I'll be there for you."

Anna had started shaking, the hand on Elsa's stomach now tightly clutching the shirt that covered it. In the weak light she looked incredibly small and fragile, and Elsa wished she could do something, anything, to ease her pain. She gingerly kissed her head and held her close.

"It's okay, Anna, it's okay. I got you." she murmured, turning to her side and softly pressing her girlfriend's head to her chest.

"It still doesn't feel real." Anna whispered after she had calmed down a bit. "Every time I check my phone I expect a text from her. But when I close my eyes, I can't help but imagine what she looked like. I read about it, after you and your partner were at our apartment."

Elsa swallowed around the lump in her throat. "Don't, Anna. Don't do this to yourself."she said resolutely.

"Is it true?" the redhead pressed on, ignoring her plea. "What they write in those articles?"

"No." Elsa quickly said. _'It's so much worse.'_ she thought. "You know how these vultures are." she said instead. "They make up the wildest things to get viewers and clicks."

Anna fell silent again, but Elsa had a feeling that she had seen right through her lie.

"Sleep now," the blonde whispered, "tomorrow will be a brand new day. You'll see."

Anna only tightened her hold on Elsa as a response, but her breaths soon evened out. Elsa continued slowly rubbing her hand up and down Anna's back. Despite the turmoil of the last few days, Elsa felt at peace. This was were she belonged, she realized. Cradling Anna in her arms, making her feel save and loved and protected.

_'I love her.'_

The thought hit her like a brick to the face, but, strangely, it didn't scare her. This was where she belonged, after all. With a smile she fell asleep, and for the first time in nine years, she wasn't plagued by a single bad dream.

* * *

**guess what: it's saturday! which means: a new chapter for you guys! yay**

**i'm down with a nasty cold, but this chapter has been sitting on my harddrive for quite a while. chaptes 9 and 10 are also finished, and chapter 11 is coming along, albeit slowly. there's not much you can do when you sleep 15 hours a day to get rid of a cold. except coughing up your lungs every 5 seconds. that works like a charm -.-**

**aaaaanyway, once again a big, fat shoutout to my more than amazing beta _ComplexStatus_, who really deserves all the love, hugs, and other small and affectionate but definitely not creepy gestures you guys send her way. and you better do, because she's the peanut butter to the jelly of this fic. seriousy. she's awesome!**

**ah, and finally this chapter. the last part was actually the initial plot bunny that kinda spawned this whole thing around it. it sure feels good to finally get it published, even though it's quite different from how i originally envisioned it. this fic has evolved quite a bit even before the first line had been written. i might get into that in a lenghty A/N at the end of the last chapter. as in, even longer than this one. and i'm truly sorry that this one has turned out this long. i'm just gonna stop now. don't forget to be awesome, people**

**peace out**


	9. Passion

**Warning: here be lemons**

* * *

Elsa stumbled into the apartment, a giggling Anna in tow. They quickly shed their coats and shoes, leaving them where they fell. Making their way to the couch they collapsed onto it in a heap, and somehow Anna ended up on top, pinning Elsa down and kissing her fiercely.

"Tonight has been great." she murmured when they broke apart. Elsa agreed wholeheartedly. She suddenly snorted, trying to contain her laughter.

"What?" Anna asked, slightly confused.

"I still can't believe you _accidentally_ spilled your whole beer on that guy." she said between giggles.

The redhead started laughing, too. "Best eight bucks I've ever spent. And he had to take the hint _somehow_, no one hits on my girlfriend without my express permission!"

"The look on his face!" the blonde said, clutching her stomach in laughter. "Best part of the concert."

They had been out to see Kvelertak. In the week after Nicole's funeral, Anna's mood improved markedly, but she was still prone to bouts of sadness and reclusiveness, and Elsa decided that a change of scenery would do her some good. As luck would have it, the band played a few shows in New York as part of their North American tour, and she had managed to get some last-minute tickets for their show at the Hollow in Albany. She wasn't usually much of a concert person, disliking large and sweaty crowds, but today really had been a blast. Mainly because Anna had smiled and laughed the whole evening. That she got to see one of her favorite bands and nabbed some amazing merchandise was more of a bonus to her.

"We should do that again." Anna said after calming down a bit. Her fingers lazily grazed Elsa's exposed collarbone and she pressed a quick kiss to her lips. One turned into two, and soon they were in a heated make-out session, hands roving all over their bodies. The redhead placed a searing trail of kisses on Elsa's neck, and the blonde couldn't help the moan that escaped her throat. Anna looked back up, her pupils dilated to a degree that her teal irises were almost invisible. The look of those eye made Elsa feel exposed.

Wordlessly, Anna got up and tugged at her hand, urging her to get off the couch, too. As soon as she was on her feet, Anna dragged her through the apartment. Elsa was about to ask what she was doing when the redhead shoved open her bedroom door, ushering her inside and pushing her onto the bed with a wicked grin on her face.

_'Holy shit!'_ Elsa thought. _'Is this really happening?!'_

Her question was answered not a moment later when Anna straddled her, and in one fluent motion discarded the shirt she had been wearing. Elsa, completely dumbstruck, didn't even get time to admire the redhead's toned stomach or her breasts only covered by a black lacy bra, because Anna immediately bent down and resumed her kisses and suckles on Elsa's throat. Her hands traveled over Anna's back and fisted into her hair, enjoying every second of it.

Some small part of her mind that was not drunk on _Anna_ kept blaring at her that this was somehow wrong, that they should at least talk about it. With a humongous effort she tugged on Anna's hair, bringing up her face to look into her eyes. The pure lust she saw there made her waver in her resolve, but she pushed on.

"Anna." she said, and it came out as a breathy sigh. "Are you sure about this?"

"I'm sure, sunshine." she husked. "Now, I don't want to hear another word out of your mouth unless it's dirty talk."

Elsa swallowed heavily, but her desire finally won out and she raised her head, capturing Anna's lips in a searing kiss while her hand searched for the clasp of her bra. Anna realized what she was going for and jerked back, wagging her finger teasingly. She slowly got up and took a step back, looking Elsa straight in the eyes as her hands moved down her body. Finding the button of her jeans she popped it open, smirking devilishly as Elsa's eyes followed her hand slowly pulling down the zipper. She turned around and bent down, pushing her pants down in one smooth motion, giving Elsa a perfect view of her black lace thong.

_'Matching underwear?'_ Elsa thought, one eyebrow raised. '_I never had a chance.'_

Anna's clumsiness chose the worst possible time to show itself when her heel caught in one pant leg while she tried to pull it off, causing her to suddenly lose balance and fall square on her butt. Elsa, who had been resting on her elbows, shot up immediately, mortified and with absolutely no idea what she should do. She saw Anna's shoulders beginning to shake and was already halfway off the bed to comfort her when the redhead started laughing like a madwoman, clutching her sides. Relief flooded Elsa and she allowed herself to chuckle along.

After a minute Anna calmed down and finally kicked off her jeans and turned around, smiling sheepishly. "Well, that happened." she drawled, awkwardly brushing a strand of red hair out of her face. "So much for my 'ginger seductress' act, huh?"

"You had a pretty good run until..._that_." Elsa replied with a wave at the discarded jeans.

Anna got to her knees and was suddenly in between the blonde's legs, slowly dragging her nails up her denim-clad thighs. "You want me to keep going, then?" she husked. The mood instantly shifted and Elsa was immediately and painfully aware that the redhead was just in her underwear and _sitting between her thighs_, and only managed to nod while staring into those teal eyes that almost glowed with want.

"Well, in that case," Anna whispered, moving her hands to the seam of Elsa's shirt and tugging lightly, "_this_ needs to go."

Elsa's arms were up in the air even before her brain had caught up with Anna's words, and a moment later the offending garment was off, discarded to the floor without another thought. Anna dragged her hands up Elsa's stomach and cupped her breasts through her bra, squeezing the pliant flesh, while she slowly kissed her way up Elsa's body, starting at the navel until she reached her neck, licking and nibbling at pale skin. She reached behind and pulled off the elastic, unraveling Elsa's braid and gently tugging at her hair to urge her to lay back down. Elsa complied all too willingly and closed her eyes, letting the sensations wash over her as Anna straddled her again and once more began worshiping her neck. She let out a loud moan when redhead suddenly bit down hard, sucking at her flesh and releasing it with an audible pop.

The blonde once again reached for the clasp of Anna's bra, and this time there was no protest when she found it, quickly undoing it and throwing it off the bed to be forgotten almost immediately. Elsa reveled in the feeling of Anna's bare breasts resting on her own skin, rock-hard nipples poking into her. She instantly took them both in her hands and started playing with them, delighted at the throaty moan her actions caused. Deciding that Anna shouldn't have all the fun, she firmly pressed her thigh against Anna's core, eliciting a sharp gasp. She sat up and stared at Elsa with a lust-filled gaze. "Pants off, now!" she growled, quickly moving down the blonde's body and undoing her button and zipper. Elsa lifted her hips, but lowered them again and grabbed Anna's hands before she got very far.

Anna looked up questioningly, only to find Elsa's cheeks aflame with red, unable to meet her eyes. "This, uh, this will sound stupid," the blonde began, "but I kinda haven't shaved my legs in a while."

Anna chuckled and bent down, placing a series of kisses just above Elsa's panty-line. "That's okay, sunshine." she replied, "I really don't care right now."

Without waiting for a reply, she resolutely tugged at the blonde's jeans and panties, pulling them off her legs in one smooth motion. Her senses were immediately invaded by the delicious scent of her girlfriend's arousal, and her mouth watered when she saw how wet she already was. Without warning, Anna dragged her tongue along Elsa's slit, causing the blonde to moan loudly and buck her hips. She tangled one of her hands in her hair and hooked her legs behind Anna's back, letting out a pathetic whimper when the redhead's lips left her own.

"You need it _that_ bad, huh?" Anna said with a mischievous smirk.

"Sh-shut up." Elsa replied, already panting. Anna was right, though. Elsa couldn't remember the last time she had gone a whole month without sex, and pleasing herself was wholly unsatisfying, especially when she had to keep the noise down due to her girlfriend sleeping just next door. She needed it _very_ bad.

Anna merely chuckled and went back to her girlfriend's core, alternating slow licks and suckles with soft nibbles, quickly discovering what got the most delicious sounds out of Elsa. She especially liked the almost breathless mewls when she so much as brushed her clit, and thus focused most of her ministrations there, much to Elsa's obvious delight.

Elsa had never been one for talking during sex, mostly because she often couldn't even remember her partner's names at this point, but she just couldn't help using Anna's name almost like a prayer. Her frequent 'oh my god's further contributed to that analogy.

Elsa knew that she wouldn't have lasted long once it got serious, but this was ridiculous. Anna had been at it for barely five minutes and she could already feel the slight tingling spreading through her body. Looking down didn't help either, because, _fuck,_ the sight of Anna enthusiastically licking at her core would've been enough to get her off without any physical stimulus. She was faintly aware of how the muscles in her legs started tensing, but what sent her over the edge was Anna slowly inserting a finger while looking her straight in the eyes.

Her back arched off the bed and her eyes rolled back in their sockets while her thighs clamped shut around Anna's head, keeping her firmly in place. Who didn't mind one bit, watching in delight as convulsions violently shook Elsa's body while she greedily lapped up every single drop of liquid. Her knees were starting to get sore, but she barely noticed. All her attention was focused on the blonde goddess writhing on the bed in pure ecstasy.

Elsa slowly came down from her high, panting like she'd just run a marathon. "You _really_ needed it bad, huh?" Anna asked teasingly, pressing feather-light kisses on Elsa's upper thighs. The blonde merely groaned, letting her free arm fall over her eyes, acutely aware that Anna's finger was still inside her. Driving the point home the redhead wiggled the digit, giggling at the sudden jerk of Elsa's hips, before slowly withdrawing it and licking it clean.

She slowly got up, ignoring her protesting knees, and straddled Elsa again, pressing lazy kisses against her clavicle and working her way up to her mouth. The blonde usually didn't like being kissed after someone had just gone down on her, but found it strangely appealing tasting herself on Anna's lips. Perhaps it was just a level of intimacy she hadn't been comfortable with with any of her past flings, but she enjoyed the new, pleasant sensation nonetheless, returning Anna's kiss with renewed vigor.

"I've never come that fast with anyone else before." she murmured once they broke their lip-lock.

Anna snorted in response. "Well, I'm just _that_ good, sunshine." she replied smugly.

Elsa sat up slowly, pushing up Anna's body with her. "Let's just see how well _you_ hold up." she said with a challenging smile, enjoying the shiver that ran through the redhead's body. She grabbed her hips and basically threw Anna onto the pillows, who let out a surprised yelp. Getting on all fours she slowly advanced on the redhead, pressing their bodies flush together and kissed her hard on the mouth, wandering to her jaw and following up to the redhead's ear. "Your turn." she husked in the most seductive voice she could muster, leaning back to drag down Anna's thong and throw it off the bed.

She paused for a moment, taking in her girlfriend in all her naked glory. She admired her small but perky breasts, gaze traveling down a smooth stomach to between her thighs and the thin strip of red hair that sat there. She was amazed that all this was hers, and hers only.

Shaking her head to clear out her thoughts, she slowly dragged her hands up and down both of Anna's calves, following her fingers with her mouth and peppering dozens of kisses on both of Anna's legs, steadily advancing upward. She could feel Anna squirming, and the little gasps and moans that fell from the redhead's lips made her want to just ravish her girlfriend, but she was on a mission.

Her hands already lay on Anna's hips and her face was at the apex of her thighs, her hot breath fanning over Anna's wet lips. A needy whine came from above her and Elsa smirked. She was determined to let Anna stew for a little while longer. She kissed along fiery red curls and couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her lips upon hearing a frustrated groan.

"Patience." she whispered into Anna's navel, steadily moving upward. She finally reached her breasts and took a stiff nipple in her mouth, resting her weight on her right hand while her left remained between Anna's thighs, steadily caressing the skin around her center but never _quite_ touching where Anna wanted it most. It drove her mad.

"Elsaaa, please..." she whined pathetically.

"Please what, copper head?" the blonde replied, moving from her breasts to her neck, lavishing her throat with kisses and nibbles and licks.

"Don't make me say it." Anna pushed out between heavy breaths.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Elsa teased, still focusing an extraordinary amount of attention to Anna's neck.

The redhead groaned and seemed quite hesitant to getting the words over her lips, a stark departure from her almost aggressive behavior just minutes earlier. Finally, she relented.

"Please fuck me." she husked, hoping it would be enough for Elsa to end this torture.

The blonde looked her straight in the eyes, faces only inches apart, as she slowly slid one of her fingers into Anna. "Like this?" she asked with a devilish smirk that only grew larger at the drawn-out moan leaving her girlfriend's throat.

Elsa was quick to add a second finger and set a fast pace pumping in and out of Anna, who wrapped her arms around the blonde and smashed their lips together in a bruising kiss. She actually sank her nails deep into Elsa's skin when the blonde curled her fingers and hit _that_ spot. Elsa barely felt the pain through the ecstasy coursing through her body and started kissing her way down again. Anna tangled her fingers in Elsa's hair when she reached her center, her other hand going up to the headboard desperately grasping for anything to keep her grounded when Elsa started kissing and sucking at her clit, quickly building her towards an explosive orgasm.

Anna's pants and moans quickened and Elsa looked up just in time to see the redhead's eyes screw shut, her face contorting in the most radiant image of bliss. No sounds left her wide-open mouth as her walls squeezed Elsa's fingers, and for a moment Elsa became worried when she noticed that Anna wasn't breathing at all. Her worries evaporated when Anna sucked in air greedily and let out a shuddering breath, slowly coming down.

She tugged at Elsa's hair, urging her to move upwards, and the blonde obliged, curling herself into Anna's side. The redhead had this particular aura of an afterglow that made Elsa want to shower her with affection and so she did, peppering Anna's face with little kisses while her left hand drew lazy circles on her abdomen.

When Anna had finally caught her breath she turned to her side, pressing her body flush against Elsa's. They gazed into each other's eyes and Elsa's hand came up, cupping Anna's cheek before gingerly kissing her, letting their tongues dance with a gentleness that had been absent in their previous activities.

They broke apart, and Anna felt the need to say _something_, to make sure that what had just happened was indeed real, and not just a vivid dream.

"That was...wow." was the only thing her dopamine-muddled mind could come up with.

"Well, I'm just _that_ good, copper head." Elsa replied with a chuckle that only grew in volume when Anna weakly swatted at her shoulder.

The redhead snaked her arm around Elsa's waist and moved her hand up and down Elsa's spine, brushing over the long and deep tracks her fingernails had left in the pale skin.

"Sorry about that." she muttered bashfully, hand still roving over exposed skin.

Elsa just made a dismissive gesture. "Don't be sorry, I think it's kinda hot. Besides, it doesn't hurt too bad. My arm feels worse."

Anna scrunched up her face in confusion. "Your arm? Why does your arm..." She trailed off when she saw Elsa's raised eyebrow and impish smile. "Oh..._oh_!" She was furiously blushing now.

"You seriously blush after all that happened in the last thirty minutes?" Elsa asked with a mirthful smile.

"Shut up." Anna mumbled. "And the doctors told you not to over-exert yourself!" she added in a slightly reprimanding tone.

"Oh, 'over-exert', that's what we're calling it now?"

"You're the worst." Anna replied, kissing Elsa lightly on the lips.

They fell into a comfortable silence, and Anna eventually turned to lie on her back again. Elsa snuggled into her once more and pulled the blanket over them both after finally getting rid of her bra.

Anna watched intently as the blonde revealed her breasts and reveled in the feeling of them being pressed against her side.

"Just for the record," she said sleepily, "I think it's ridiculous that that thing stayed on the whole time."

Elsa merely chuckled and kissed Anna on the cheek, settling in for the night. They both fell asleep soon after.

* * *

**so, yeah. that happened...i really hope you like it, and I greatly appreciate any and all feedback. but go easy, please, first time writing smut and stuff :/**

**yet again the most heartfelt thank you to my fantastic beta _ComplexStatus_, who is just the absolute best there is. love ya, girl :3**

**fun fact: while writing this chapter i have been listening on repeat to Lovecult, the new album of german hardcore-band Jungbluth. in which they criticize love having been morphed into** **a surrogate religion ******by media and society**, the life-long hunt for a soulmate being the supposed be-all end-all means to happiness, and the monetarization of it by a huge and ruthless industry. funny how life is ironic that way, huh?**

**anyway**

**peace out**


	10. Thanksgiving

Elsa was squirming and obviously uncomfortable, standing in front of a nondescript apartment door.

"Will you please stop your fidgeting? You'll be fine." Anna said with a mirthful chuckle.

"Easy for you to say," Elsa retorted, "You're not meeting _my_ mom, and on Thanksgiving, no less!"

Anna laughed and pressed a light kiss to her cheek. "Relax, sunshine. My mom has been badgering me about meeting you ever since I told her about you."

Elsa scoffed. "Yeah, right. I was basically still down between your legs when you called her."

Anna blushed furiously. "That is so not true! I couldn't have even picked up my phone, the way you wore me out."

Elsa snickered and remembered back to the morning after their first time together.

* * *

She woke when her pillow shifted slightly beneath her. To her sleep-addled mind it made perfect sense that her head rose and fell gently in a rhythmical fashion. She snuggled deeper into it, and only then did it feel kinda strange. She realized that she was lying on top of someone. No, not someone. _Anna_. Last night came back to her and she smiled, letting out a content sigh.

"Sweet dreams?" the redhead asked softly.

Elsa opened her bleary eyes and blinked a few times, getting used to the unusual brightness in the room. She realized that it must've been well into the late morning, which struck her as odd since she usually was an early riser. Despite the fact that she hated mornings with all her heart and needed at least an hour before she could be considered useful in any fashion.

When she could open her eyes without feeling like someone pushed needles through her retina she turned her head upwards, and there she was. Anna. In all her glowing, morning-after-sex glory.

"Hey." Elsa murmured sleepily, grinning when Anna pressed a kiss to her nose.

"So?" the redhead asked.

"So what?" Elsa replied through a yawn, stretching like a cat.

"Did you have sweet dreams?"

Elsa snuggled herself back into Anna, resting her head in the crook of her neck and dragging her arm over Anna's naked waist.

"Mhm." she replied, nodding."In fact, it feels like I'm still dreaming. The most amazing dream I could ever imagine."

Anna actually cooed at that. "Aw, you hopeless romantic."

"Well, one of us has to be," Elsa replied with a smirk, "Miss 'please fuck me'."

Anna scuffed and turned her head away, blushing furiously. "You're awful."

Elsa looked up and laid a soft kiss on Anna's jaw. "I know." she said, "That's why you love me."

They both froze at the exact same moment, having processed Elsa's words. It was the first time either of them had uttered the word 'love' in regard to their relationship. They came to the silent agreement to kick _that_ conversation way down the road and just enjoy their peaceful moment together. Elsa lay her head back down and began drawing lazy circles on Anna's belly with her hands.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence, the redhead spoke up again. "Um, I hate to break the mood, but I really gotta pee."

"Can't you hold it in?" Elsa almost whined, tightening her hold on Anna's waist. She had been halfway back to dreamland.

"I've been holding it in for the past hour. I'm not a machine."

"You've been watching me sleep for an hour?"

Anna blushed and buried her face in Elsa's golden mane, simply nodding her head.

"Creep." the blonde said with a chuckle.

"Hey!" Anna replied with an indignant huff. "I'll have you know that me watching you sleep is very cute and the stuff rom-coms are made of."

"Still creepy." Elsa said, "But you're _my_ creep, so it's okay."

When Elsa didn't say anything else, Anna began squirming. "You know I _still_ got to pee, right?"

The blonde merely tightened her hold on Anna's waist even more.

"Elsa, if I don't get to a bathroom _right now_ I'll pee in your bed!"

She let out a needy whine and huffed. "Only if you promise to come right back."

Anna rolled her eyes. "Yes, I promise, now will you let me go? That wasn't an empty threat."

With a drawn-out sigh Elsa raised her hand, watching with bemusement as Anna bolted from the bed and ran for the bathroom as fast as she dared.

She acutely felt the loss of the warm body next to her's and pulled the blanket over her shoulders after pressing Anna's pillow to her chest. It was a poor substitute, but it smelled like her. With her nose being filled with the redhead's scent, she slowly drifted back to sleep.

She woke again to the mouth-watering smell of fried bacon wafting through the room. Looking around, she was a bit disappointed that she was alone in her bed, but it only made sense since Anna couldn't be in the kitchen and the bedroom at the same time. After rubbing the sleep from her eyes she stretched, popping several joints in her spine. Foregoing any underwear she just quickly threw on a large shirt, gently opening the door and shuffling to the living room. The smell got stronger, and she heard Anna silently talking, to whom she didn't know.

"I think she's woken up, I gotta hang up. Okay, see you soon. Bye."

Anna turned around and slipped her phone back into her pocket as Elsa entered the kitchen.

"Morning, sunshine." she exclaimed cheerfully. "Or, well afternoon rather." she added.

Elsa smiled, taking in all the delicious foodstuffs Anna had prepared. There was bacon, of course, but also scrambled eggs, toast, butter, jam, and a stack of pancakes, along with a large cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice. All that was somehow crammed onto a tray and it seemed like Anna had been about to surprise Elsa with breakfast in bed when she had been interrupted by a call.

"You were already back asleep when I returned, and I didn't want to wake you up. So I thouht I might surprise you, you know, bringing you breakfast and all, but then I got a call, and, well..." she trailed off, blushing faintly and averting her eyes.

"It's okay, Anna. It's really sweet." Elsa replied with a chuckle. "Why don't we eat at the table?" she asked, pointing her thumb over her shoulder.

"Sure thing!" the redhead replied and enthusiastically picked up the tray, only to trip over her own feet and nearly spilling all its contents to the floor had Elsa not caught her.

"Sorry!" Anna yelped, face red, while she carefully walked to the dining table and set down the tray.

Elsa merely chuckled and followed her, pulling out a chair and sitting down.

"Who did you talk to?" Elsa asked casually while loading her plate with a few strips of bacon and a generous helping of scrambled eggs.

"Oh, just my mom. She just wanted to check in and see how things were going. I haven't talked to her in a while,and usually we call each other at least once a week." Anna replied while she positively drowned the pancakes on her plate in syrup.

Elsa felt a small pang of guilt at her words. She could only faintly remember the last time she had talked to her mother. She still lived in Wisconsin, yes, but that was hardly an excuse in the age of smartphones and the internet.

She took a forkful of eggs in her mouth and frowned slightly when she discovered that it was only somewhat warm. Anna noticed and immediately started blushing again.

"Sorry it's not really hot anymore, but my mom is just...she likes to talk. Like _really_ likes to talk."

"It's fine, Anna." Elsa said after swallowing. "Really, it's delicious. I can't remember the last time I had such a lavish breakfast."

"Well, good. I guess I just got carried away when we talked about you. She's really eager to meet you, you know?"

Elsa almost coughed up the sip of lukewarm coffee, blinking a few times.

"You...you told her about me?" she squeaked.

"Well, mom asked what's news, and I told her."

"Don't you think it's a little...early? To tell your mom?"

"We've been dating for over a month, and after last night I'm pretty sure it won't end anytime soon." Anna replied with a suggestive wiggle of her eyebrows.

Elsa visibly paled. "You...you told her about _that_?!"

"Sure, why not?" the redhead answered, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

"It's just..." Elsa was looking for the right words. "My sex life and my parents are two spheres that don't overlap. Like, at all."

"Makes sense, considering your sex life up to this point." Anna said with a wink, before shoving basically half her pancake into her mouth.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Elsa asked, eyes narrowed.

Anna chewed vigorously, obviously regretting taking such a huge bite.

"Nothing." she finally said after swallowing, "I just don't think any parent would approve of their child having such an...'active lifestyle.'"

"Oh, and you do?" Elsa asked icily, arms crossed.

"Hey, no need to get so defensive." Anna replied with a frown. "What you did with whom before me is none of my business. I was just..." she trailed off rubbing her eyes with a sigh. "Sorry for bringing it up."

Elsa immediately felt bad at seeing Anna's downcast expression. "No, Anna, _I'm_ sorry. Here you are, making this amazing breakfast for me, surprisingly even without burning anything," the jibe got a weak chuckle out of the redhead, "and I act like a bitch. You don't deserve that."

"Let's just forget about it, okay? We're both sorry, problem solved. Now, eat up before it gets completely cold."

They resumed their breakfast and Elsa watched in amazement as Anna completely destroyed the whole stack of pancakes, getting syrup everywhere. Which made her smirk devilishly as she got an idea.

"So, are you up for saving the planet?" she asked casually.

Anna merely looked at her confusedly.

"Well, I'm gonna take a shower now, and from the looks of it, you need one, too. I was just thinking that, for the sake of the environment, we should save water and shower togeth..." She didn't get to finish the sentence as Anna was already on her feet, pulling Elsa from her chair and positively dragging her towards the bathroom.

* * *

The sound of the door being unlocked jerked her from her memories, and she was keenly aware of the blush on her cheeks.

Anna gently nudged her side before the door flew open, and the spitting image of the redhead emerged. If one ignored the crow's feet around her eyes, and the slight wrinkles around her mouth that told of a life spent smiling and laughing.

"Anna! I'm so glad you made it, despite the weather!" the woman said, gathering Anna in a bone-crushing hug that was returned with equal fervor.

"I'd never miss Thanksgiving with you, mom." she replied, a serene smile on her lips. Elsa looked decidedly lost, clutching the huge bowl of potato salad they had brought like it was her firstborn child.

The embrace eventually ended, and the older woman turned towards Elsa with a measuring gaze.

"My, Anna, you sure have an eye for them." she said before extending her arms and advancing on Elsa.

The blonde's eyes shot open and, fearing for the structural integrity of her ribcage, she thrust the bowl of salad into the woman's chest.

"We brought some potato salad." she almost shouted, hopelessly overwhelmed.

Anna's mom took the bowl with a face-splitting smile and handed it to her daughter. "That's nice, dear, but let me give you a hug."

Elsa, now bereft of her only means of defense, simply acquiesced and accepted her fate, which apparently was to be crushed to death by the mother of her girlfriend.

"Mom, she can't breathe." Anna said, pinching the bridge of her nose with her free hand.

"Nonsense." she simply replied, finally letting go of Elsa who desperately caught her breath. "Besides, _you're _the one to talk, sweetie. I don't want to look at her back after what you've told me."

Shortness of breath was immediately forgotten as Elsa's jaw fell slack, the color of her face rapidly approaching the hue of Anna's hair. The redhead, apparently used to her mother's shenanigans, merely groaned and started hitting her head against the wall.

"Now then, why don't you both come inside? Dinner is almost finished." her mom said, taking the salad from Anna's hands again and walking through the door.

Anna headed inside, but noticed that Elsa hadn't moved an inch.

"Elsa?" she asked. No reaction.

"Um, are you okay?"

Still nothing.

"Mom, I think you broke her!" she yelled into the apartment. A hearty chuckle from the kitchen was the only response.

When Elsa still hadn't moved a muscle a minute later, Anna was getting impatient. She determinedly walked up to the blonde and flicked her forehead. Hard. That seemed to do the trick.

"Ow!" Elsa complained, rubbing the spot Anna had hit. "What was that for?!"

"You were kinda...stuck." the redhead replied. "I was getting worried because I have no idea how to re-boot a human."

Elsa looked around, as if she was seeing the corridor for the very first time.

"Sooo...the last five minutes weren't a terrible nightmare I'll wake up from any moment now?" she finally said.

"Don't be silly." Anna replied. "Now come on in, dinner's almost ready."

* * *

Elsa threw back her head in laughter, clutching her sides, while Anna hid her beet-red face behind her hands and groaned loudly.

"Do you _have_ to tell that story to every person I bring home?" she asked accusingly, sending an icy glare to her mother, who merely chuckled and took another sip from her wine.

"You haven't brought a girl in _ages_, Anna! And never such a lovely one."

Elsa was grateful that her face was still flushed from laughing, because it covered up her blushing quite nicely. She quickly took a sip of coke to cover up her flustered state.

"I have to say, Astrid, tonight was very nice. I'm very much looking forward to spending New Year's with you." she finally said, a broad smile on her face.

"Oh, I do hope I'll be seeing you before then, love." she replied.

"Only if you promise to tell more stories about Anna's formative years." the blonde answered with a chuckle, pointedly ignoring her girlfriend's huff and crossed arms.

"Don't worry, dear, there's _plenty_ more where that came from."

"Mooom..." Anna almost whined, "and here you wonder why I never introduce you to any of my girlfriends."

Astrid merely giggled and emptied what remained of her glass of wine. There was lull in the conversation until Elsa spoke up again.

"I've never actually spent Thanksgiving with someone else, so I'm not sure how this works, but...um, should we help with the dishes or anything?"

Astrid resolutely shook her head. "Oh no dear, absolutely not. I'll take care of that tomorrow. You guys must be tired, and there's ice on the streets."

"We're not ten, mom, you can't send us to bed like that!" Anna protested, but whatever effect it may have had was ruined by the drawn-out yawn that escaped her immediately after.

Her mother merely raised an amused eyebrow.

"Very well, point taken." Anna grumbled, immediately covering up another yawn.

They lingered around the table for a bit while Astrid was busy putting leftovers into boxes for them to take home, enough to last them a whole week. Finally they dressed for the way home, and Anna's mother stood in the doorway, a goofy smile plastered onto her face.

"Drive safe, you hear? You need to bring my baby girl to _bed_ safe and sound." she said with a suggestive wiggle of her eyebrows. Elsa flushed a bright red while Anna just looked to the ceiling, muttering "Dear god, just kill me now. No? Not even a little smiting?"

"Now, Anna, don't be so melodramatic." Astrid admonished, her grin stretching even wider.

"Let's just go." Anna said, tugging on Elsa's free hand and dragging her towards the elevators. The blonde gave a yelp and fought hard to keep the precariously stacked Tupperware in her her other hand balanced, shooting and apologetic glance to Astrid. "Bye mom!" Anna hollered, already halfway down the corridor.

* * *

The door was barely open when Anna dragged Elsa into the apartment, not caring the least if any of the leftovers crashed to the floor. She kicked the door shut and pressed Elsa against the wall, kissing her hard.

"I really want to peel you out of these clothes, _right now_!" she growled when they broke apart. Neither of them had noticed when the plastic containers had actually tumbled to the ground, miraculously not spilling any of their contents.

Elsa only managed a moan in response because Anna had already latched onto her neck, kissing and sucking like there was no tomorrow. She kicked off her shoes while feebly pawing at Anna's coat, trying to get it off.

Soon they were stumbling into the dark living room, lips still engaged in a heated kiss, when Elsa stepped into something wet. _'Hold on, that's not right.'_

She forcefully pushed herself away from the redhead and looked down, making out the remnants of a footprint, slushy, half-melted snow spreading over the floor. Straining her eyes, she made out several more, all over the living room.

"Anna, do you know how..." She was interrupted by the lights suddenly flicking on.

"How nice of you to join me. I was starting to get lonely." a male voice that sounded eerily familiar said.

They both whipped their heads towards the far corner of the room, where indeed someone sat on a lounger. Elsa felt Anna go stiff as a board next to her, but she recognized him easily enough from the facial composite. It was the Iceman. In _her_ apartment. Her hand reflexively shot to where her gun would be on her belt, only to belatedly realize that it was lying in some evidence room at the IAB.

"Looking for something?" he said with a disgusting smile, casually raising the hand that had been hidden by his body, revealing the pistol it held.

Elsa took a step to the side, hiding Anna's body with her own. "What do you want?" she said, hoping her utter terror wouldn't seep into her voice.

"You know exactly what I want, _Elsa_!" he spat, getting up and slowly advancing on them.

"You won't lay a single finger on her, asshole!"

He actually laughed at that, steadily coming closer. "Oh, I'm actually quite sure of that. See, I'm not here for her...but for _you_."

Elsa swallowed audibly, trying her hardest not to let her fear show. He was close now, showing a predatory smile that made cold sweats erupt all over her body.

"Now, I would really prefer if you came along nice and quiet," he said, pushing the muzzle of his pistol against Elsa's collarbone, "I might even consider not shooting that redheaded bitch hiding behi..."

He didn't get to finish, because Elsa had waited just for that moment. Lightning quick her left arm shot up, forcefully pushing the pistol to the side and away from her body while her right hand was going straight for his face. Unfortunately she wasn't quite fast enough because the gun went off before tumbling from his hand, skidding over the floor. She distinctly felt the bullet enter her shoulder, but thanks to the ridiculous amount of adrenaline in her bloodstream she didn't feel any pain. Yet.

She had also gotten in a solid hit on his cheek, sending him reeling and almost falling over. Elsa ignored Anna's desperate cries that she could hear only faintly over the rushing in her ears, and pressed her advantage. He had gotten upright again but was dazed, and she grabbed a fistful of beard, intent on pulling his face down to maximize the effect of the palm strike she intended to do. To her utter confusion, however, when she actually tugged at the hair it came off, leaving her staring at it dumbly.

The few moments of not paying attention were enough for him to draw back his arm and hit her square in the jaw with such force it actually sent her flying a few feet before she crashed down on her injured shoulder. A searing-hot lance of pain shot through her body and she let out a breathless yelp, desperately trying to clear her dazed head. She could hear his heavy footfalls closing in and prepared herself for another blow, but she looked up just in time to see Anna coming up from behind and hitting him over the head with an umbrella that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

He fell to the floor and within moments Anna was upon him, a flurry of fists hitting him in the face with as much force as she could muster.

After recovering from the initial shock he started fighting back, easily overpowering the redhead and flinging her aside like a ragdoll. Elsa was painfully aware of the dull thud when Anna's skull connected with the floor, leaving her lying in an unmoving heap. She could see how he was looking around the room before walking over to the coffee table, bending down and picking up the discarded pistol. She desperately tried to get up again but made the mistake of reflexively trying to push herself up with her left hand, and noisily flopped back down when the arm gave out.

She was panting heavily and could see how he slowly, deliberately even, walked over to the redhead lying motionless on the floor and pointed the gun to her head. "The price of disobedience!" he hissed and Elsa closed her eyes, unable to look on. She waited for the shot but it never came, and only slowly did she become aware of the sirens howling in the distance.

She dared to open her eyes and saw him standing with a conflicted expression, gun pointing to the floor. He raised it towards Anna once more and looked Elsa straight in the eye before he put the weapon in its holster and ran out of the apartment, leaving the door wide open.

Elsa didn't care about any of that, slowly getting up on her knees and crawling over to the prone redhead.

"Anna?" she almost whispered, afraid to even touch her. She could see her chest was still rising and falling, but her eyes remained closed.

"Anna! Say something!" she cried, starting to roughly shake her shoulder.

Anna's eyes shot open and she abruptly sat up, her upper body swaying precariously before she oriented herself and her eyes fell onto the blonde.

"Elsa!" she gasped, unable to tear her eyes away from her shoulder. "You're bleeding."

"I know, copper head." she replied with a weak chuckle. She had to be strong now. "Look me in the eyes, Anna." she said in a calm voice that surprised even herself. She stared intently into teal eyes for a moment, noticing how one pupil was almost fully dilated while the other was small as a needle, before gently running a hand over Anna's cheek.

"You have a concussion." she said, almost tenderly "We need to get you to a hospital."

Anna merely shook her head, her eyes wandering around before focusing on her shoulder again. "You're bleeding, Elsa!"

"Anna, listen to me!" Elsa said in a stern voice. "We need to stay calm right now, okay? Everything is going to be fine, trust me. Do you trust me?"

Anna weakly nodded, obviously fighting back tears.

"Good. Now I want you to get up and get your phone, and call 911. We don't know whether those sirens are for us."

Anna immediately rose to her feet, bracing herself against the wall when a bout of vertigo hit. She quickly found her phone and dialed 911 while Elsa gently lay back down on the floor. She could see black spots slowly invading the edges of her vision.

"They're coming, they'll be here in five minutes!" Anna said, kneeling back down next to Elsa.

"Good." Elsa said, trying her best to send a reassuring smile. "I need you to do something for me, okay?"

Anna nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"You need to reach under my shoulder and see if you can feel an exit wound. Can you do that?"

Anna did as she was bid, and after a minute of running her fingers over Elsa's shoulderblade shook her head. "I don't feel anything."

"Okay, that's good, that's good. Now, you need to get a clean dishtowel and press it onto the wound as hard as you can, okay?"

"But won't that hurt you?" Anna almost whispered.

"Yes, it will, but it will also staunch the bleeding. The ambulance will be here in no time, but until then we have to make do."

Anna got up again and ran into the kitchen, returning mere seconds later with a towel and pressing it onto the wound. Elsa hissed and contorted her face as pain shot through her body, but fought it down and tried her best to smile for Anna.

"You're doing great, copper head." she mumbled, her words getting slurred. "I don't want to scare you, but I think I'm going to pass out any moment now. No matter what happens, keep pressure on the wound until the EMTs arrive, okay?"

Anna whispered a quick 'yes', bending down to catch Elsa's lips in a chaste kiss. When they broke apart again, Elsa could barely distinguish her features anymore.

"We're going to be okay." she slurred, barely audible. "I love you."

A fresh wave of tears rolled down Anna's cheeks as Elsa finally gave in to the overwhelming heaviness she felt, the world slowly fading to black.

THE END LOL

* * *

**okay, after i gave you all a small heart attack with that last line: sorry? don't draw and quarter me, please. this is, of course, NOT the end. well, not the end of this story, at least. but it's the end of fluff for a loooooong, long time. you better buckle yourselves in guys, because the angst-train ain't got no brakes!**

**also, a PSA: differently dilated pupils are actually a hint that there's something worse than a concussion, like a fractured skull or cranial bleeding. if you notice one of your friend's (or your own) pupils are differently sized, get their ass to an emergency room ASAP!**

**on to lighter things: a huge thank you to my amazing beta _ComplexStatus_! i'm seriously running out of ways to tell you guys how incredibly awesome she is, so simply believe me when i say: she's awesome! the awesomest! so awesome it actually violates the laws of physics and a black hole of awesome will open any moment now and swallow us all.**

**in case that black hole didn't swallow us and has instead chosen to co-exist peacefully: any suggestions/questions/feedback/critique/insults are greatly appreciated. send them my way via review, PM, or carrier pigeon. that's all. **

**don't forget to be awesome :)**


	11. Christmas Reunion

A dull throb in her left shoulder was the first thing she became aware of. Soon, other sensations joined in. The scratchy blanket covering her, slow, constant beeping, her hand being gently squeezed. She slowly opened her eyes, immediately focusing on the redhead sitting to her right.

"Hey." she said softly.

"Hey, back." Anna replied with a small smile. "How do you feel?"

"Everything's kinda...floaty." she slurred with a small giggle.

"That would be anesthesia wearing off, I suppose." Anna said, her smile broadening.

Elsa lifted her right hand and booped Anna's nose. "You're cute. If I didn't have a girlfriend I'd be aaaaaall over you."

Anna actually laughed at that. "I _am_ your girlfriend, dummy."

Elsa giggled again. "Really? Niiice." Her eyes went wide in sudden shock. "Please don't tell my girlfriend I said that. The thing about being all over you. She's amaaaazing. You really look a lot like her. Like, a _lot_."

"I know, sunshine." Anna said, fighting really hard to keep her laughter at bay.

"That's what she calls me, too! Have you met her? She's amazing, don't you think? I love her thiiiis much." She widely extended her arms, or at least her right arm. She turned her head and glowered at her left arm when it would only move a little bit. "More than that!"

"She loves you, too." the redhead replied with a wistful sigh.

Elsa's eyes lit up. "She does? That's good. Super good. I should tell her, don't you think?"

"She already knows, sunshine. You should try and sleep a bit, and tell her when you wake up. I'm sure she'd appreciate that."

Elsa merely nodded and closed her eyes, settling deeper into her pillow with a sigh. And just like that, she was gone.

* * *

"I should have recorded it. No one's gonna believe me."

"Oh, I can imagine. I still remember how you were completely out of it after you woke up from your appendectomy. I think Elsa would like hearing that story."

"Mooooom!"

Elsa groaned faintly, and the voices immediately died down, if only for a second.

"I'm gonna grab a coffee. Give you two some alone time." one of the two women said. _'Astrid'_ she belatedly realized when the door had shut. Her eyes fluttered open, and the scene seemed eerily familiar. A smile graced her lips when her gaze fell on Anna.

"Welcome back, sunshine." the redhead drawled with a grin that seemed decidedly out of place, what with her waking up after having been _shot_, in her own apartment, by the _deranged sociopath_ the whole city was hunting.

"I had the weirdest dream." Elsa said in a slow voice.

"Oh? Do tell." Anna replied, trying her hardest to suppress the knowing smirk.

Elsa started fidgeting. "Well, there was someone who looked exactly like you but wasn't you, and we had the most bizarre conversation..." She trailed off, uncomfortable with revealing any more.

"So what did you talk about with that person who 'looked exactly like me but wasn't me'?"

Elsa was looking increasingly distressed. "Just some stuff." she mumbled, desperately hoping Anna would drop the topic.

"Oh, I'm sure it was very enlightening," Anna replied, "thiiiis much." while spreading her arms with a wicked grin.

Elsa's eyes widened, blood shooting to her cheeks. "It wasn't a dream?" she yelped, completely mortified.

"Unh-uh" Anna said, shaking her head while still wearing that shit-eating grin.

Elsa merely groaned and tried to hide her face in her right hand, wishing to somehow rewind time. Anna gently pried her hand away and pressed a loving kiss to her lips.

"It's alright, sunshine." she whispered, "I...I love you, too."

Elsa's eyes started to water and pulled the redhead into a crushing embrace with her good arm, resting her face in the crook of her neck.

After a few minutes they broke apart, and only then did Elsa remember that Anna had been injured, too. Feeling slightly guilty she quickly asked: "How do _you_ feel?"

"Oh, just a concussion, like you said." she replied, rolling her eyes and making a dismissive gesture. "I have a massive headache and I've been throwing up all over the place, but it's slowly getting better. Doc says I should take it _very_ easy over the next two weeks, no physically or mentally strenuous activities. Meaning no school for now, and, unfortunately, no sex."

Elsa leaned back into her pillows, closing her eyes briefly while sighing deeply. Only now did she become aware of the dull throb coming from her jaw, but she chose to ignore it.

"I'm just glad you're okay, copper head. I can deal with no sex and you being bored out of your mind for two weeks."

Anna playfully slapped her good shoulder, but suddenly went very rigid. She groaned before making a dash for the bathroom, heaving into the toilet.

Elsa, despite knowing it was probably a bad idea, tried standing up to somehow comfort her girlfriend, but by the time she had managed the get into a sitting position, the door opened and a doctor entered.

"Ah, you're awake." he said with a smile, that turned into a reprimanding frown. "You should be lying down, Miss McKay. If you can't avoid tackling bullets with your body, I have to insist that you actually take the time to recover before the next time."

She smiled sheepishly and slowly lay back down.

"Very good. Now, how are you feeling?"

"Sore." she replied, "But no pain so far. Thanks to this, I suppose." She wriggled her right arm which had an IV drip stuck in it.

"Indeed." he answered, the smile returning to his lips. "I'm Dr. Andersen by the way. You might remember me from the last time I worked a bullet out of you."

"Oh yeah, I thought you looked familiar." she said. His strange comment earlier suddenly made sense. "Funny coincidence. Sorry to say I haven't learned my lesson the last time."

He chuckled and was about to reply when he heard the toilet flush and Anna stepping out of the bathroom.

"Miss Keller!" he barked, "I told you to lie down! You have an emesis basin for that."

"Um, sorry?" she replied with the same sheepish grin, quickly walking to the empty bed Elsa only now noticed.

"Alright," he said, "I'm going to take a look at your shoulder, seeing how that hole is holding up."

He did as he said and changed the dressing in the process, studying some readings off her monitors and the clipboard at he foot of her bed afterwards.

"Okay, looking good so far. The wound should heal nicely. I'm happy to say that there wasn't any nerve damage. I'm keeping you here another night, just to be sure, but you should be good to go tomorrow morning, if you promise to change the dressing regularly."

"Another night? How long have I been out?"

He glanced briefly at his wristwatch. "Just about 14 hours." At that moment his pager went off. "Looks like I'm needed elsewhere. If you require anything, ring for a nurse." He headed towards the door and turned his head before leaving the room. "And take it easy, both of you!"

He walked outside, and she could hear his faint voice saying "You can see them now."

Kristoff immediately entered the room, looking overjoyed at seeing Elsa being awake and okay. Somewhat okay, at least.

"So how are my two favorite lesbians doing?" he said, relief coating his voice.

"Eat shit." Elsa drawled, smile on her face, while Anna let out an unladylike snort.

"I love you, too." was his reply, but his smile quickly vanished. "I'm sorry to break the mood, but here."

He tossed a sealed plastic bag towards her, a small object inside. She inspected it closely, quite confused.

"What am I supposed to do with a fake nose?"

"We found it your apartment. Must have come off when Miss feisty-pants over here pounded his face. Nice job, by the way." he said, turning towards Anna.

Elsa audibly slapped her forehead. "Fake nose and fake beard, no wonder the facial composite didn't turn up anything."

"Yeah. Forensics ran a DNA scan off the sweat inside, and it was him. Elsa, this is fucked up. He knows your name. He knows where you _live_!"

Elsa tiredly rubbed her eyes. She felt panic well up inside her, but fought it down. No sense losing her head.

"Does this help us in any way?" she asked.

"None that I can see."

"It's just so weird. At first I thought he was there for Anna, you know, getting rid of the witness. But then he said he was there for me, and I can't make any sense of it. What would he want with me?"

"Hell if I know. Slow down the investigation, maybe? But shouldn't he be coming after me, too, then?"

"How would he even know that we were involved? It doesn't make any _sense_!"

Sh wracked her brain, trying to think of any way he could've gained that information, and what he could possibly hope to achieve with coming directly after her, but she found nothing. After a few minutes of bouncing ideas back and forth, one more unlikely than the other, Kristoff sighed deeply and took the plastic bag again.

"Well, I gotta head back to the station. I'm just glad you two are okay. Take care, and take it easy you two, you hear?"

Both Anna and Elsa nodded and said their farewells.

"Bye, lovebirds." Kristoff said, reaching for he doorhandle, and suddenly the whirring in Elsa's head stopped, the pieces almost audibly falling into place.

"Kristoff!" she yelled, prompting him to stick his head back into the room.

"Yeah?" he asked confusedly.

Elsa was trembling slightly. "Did...did Neil come into work today?"

"Neil?" Kristoff echoed dumbly, confusion growing. "Um, no. He called in sick. Flu, I believe. Why?"

"It's him." Elsa whispered, eyes open wide. "Oh my god, it's him!"

"Him? What are you talking abo-..." He trailed off as realization slowly dawned on his face. "Wha- you...you think _Neil_ is the fucking Iceman?! Elsa, you can't be serious!"

"It has to be him! That's why his voice sounded so damn familiar! Same height, same build. How he evaded us for so long. He always knew exactly what we knew. How could I have been so blind!" Her voice was cracking and her head started to swim. Suddenly it had become incredibly hot and stifling under the flimsy hospital blanket.

"Who's Neil?" Anna asked, having no idea who they were talking about.

"One of our colleagues. The one you first encountered when you came to the precinct." Kristoff replied distractedly. "I...shit. It does make sense. Holy fucking hell, all this time, right under our noses!"

Elsa became white as a sheet as another realization hit her. "Beeeause of me. It was me all along." she whispered. "All those girls...oh my god, he killed them all because of me!"

She began hyperventilating, visibly shaking now. She looked around the room like a trapped animal, quickly ripping the IV out of her arm and throwing back the blanket, trying to get up.

"I have to find him! I have to...I have to get him." she mumbled, feebly struggling against Kristoff who had been at her side within moments, pinning her down on the bed.

"Anna, call for help, quick!" he yelled, trying his best to keep Elsa down without touching her wounds.

Anna, having pressed the button to call a nurse, brusquely shoved him aside, trying to get a hold on Elsa's arms.

"Elsa! Elsa, look at me!" she implored, trying her best to fight down her own distress.

When the blonde still continued to struggle, Anna did the only thing that came to her mind. She slapped Elsa's cheek, hard. That seemed to do the trick. Elsa focused her gaze on Anna, tears filling her eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Anna!" she sobbed, "Nicole, I...because of me, only because of me, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry."

Anna quickly clambered onto the bed and enveloped Elsa in a strong embrace, running her hand over blonde hair.

"Ssh, it's okay Elsa, it's okay, it's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong." she murmured, not even letting go when the nurse who had quickly entered room ordered her to do so. He quickly sedated the hysterical blonde and Anna stayed with her the whole time, gently rocking her for hours, even after Elsa had fallen asleep.

* * *

The only thing keeping her tethered was Anna's hand in her own, giving a gentle squeeze every few moments. She was wearing her dress blues, looking as presentable as possible with heavy bags under her eyes and her arm in a sling. Her shoulder still hurt, but it was nothing compared to the pain her thoughts inflicted on her. She was trapped in an ever-turning downward spiral, unable to silence the voices in her head that screamed her guilt. Her only reprieve were the few moment before falling asleep and after waking up in Anna's arms, when her mind was blissfully muddled and unable to form a single coherent thought.

"They're ready to see you now."

It took her a few moments before she realized the kindly older clerk had addressed her, pointing to the heavy oak doors at the end of the hallway. She took a deep breath and rose slowly, Anna standing up with her and pulling her into an embrace.

"You're going to be fine." she murmured after a quick kiss to her cheek.

Elsa tried her best to smile reassuringly, but she knew it failed horribly.

"Go," Anna said, bright smile on her lips, "don't keep them waiting."

After another deep breath Elsa turned around wordlessly and walked up to the doors, gut churning.

The chamber on the other side resembled a courtroom, a raised dais housing heavy tables and the three people sitting behind them, overlooking rows of empty chairs.

Elsa strode up to the single chair in front of the others, trying to put on an air of self-confidence that usually came naturally to her, but she now lacked. She tried to sit down with as much grace as possible but was interrupted by the man to her right speaking up.

"You don't need to sit down, Detective McKay, this won't take long."

Elsa gulped and remained standing, studying the faces of the two men and one woman, neither of them giving anything away. She didn't utter a word.

The woman, sitting in the middle, cleared her throat.

"We won't keep you in suspense and be brief. We've reviewed the charges laid against you by your superior, and came to the unanimous decision that they're bullshit."

Her choice of words earned her reprimanding looks from her colleagues, but Elsa hardly noticed over the tremendous relief she felt.

"I'll be frank, Detective. Your conduct during the apprehension of Mr. Townsend left much to be desired, and you entering into a romantic relationship with a witness in an ongoing case is, while not against regulations, unorthodox. Given your otherwise spotless track record and only the highest praise from your colleagues, however, we are more than willing to consider this as an isolated...transgression, that won't happen again.

"On a related note, all of us would like to express our heartfelt thanks an gratitude for providing the evidence we needed to finally launch an official investigation against Captain Sobel. We've been after him for years, but every time we thought we had something solid he weaseled his way out. Not this time. Thanks to your meticulous files we have everything we need to finally nail his ass and get him to where he belongs: out of the force and behind bars."

It was silent for a few moments and Elsa became aware of the stupid grin she had on her face, but couldn't be bothered to change her expression.

The woman spoke up again. "Do you have anything to add?" she asked, looking towards her peers. When they both shook their heads she turned back to Elsa, asking the same question.

"Oh, uh, no. No, thank you, ma'am."

"Very well," she replied, "consider your probationary period officially over and struck from the records. Given your injury I assume it will take some time until you can return to active duty?"

Elsa warily nodded.

"Very well. Take all the time you need, Detective. You've earned it. This meeting of the committee is adjourned!"

All three rose simultaneously and Elsa turned around to leave the room, but the woman called out for her to wait after telling her colleagues to go on without her. She quickly strode up to Elsa and came to a rest two feet from her. Decidedly too close for the blonde, but she fought down the urge to take a step back.

"Was there something you needed, Miss...?" she asked when the other woman didn't say anything, trying to keep her voice neutral.

The woman finally sighed, taking a step back. "Just call me Jane. I know about your case."

Elsa scoffed. "Who doesn't?"

"Yes, but I know about your connection to the...to _him_."

When the news hit that the Iceman had been a police officer, the whole city was in an uproar. Accusations were thrown left and right, the media backlash getting worse with every day he remained at large. After two weeks, the commissioner had been forced to resign under overwhelming public pressure. She herself had, thankfully, managed to stay out of the news, but everyone at the precinct had put two and two together, eventually. It had been only a matter of time until it spread to other departments. Elsa tried not to think of what would await her once she returned to work, and this conversation was entirely unwelcome.

"So?" Elsa said, eyes narrowed. "You want to give me your two cents?" She knew it was a bad idea to antagonize the woman who had just absolved her of all responsibility for the, admittedly bullshit, charges against her, but still. She couldn't help it.

"No, not at all." Jane replied, raising her hands in an appeasing gesture. "Listen, I know the coming weeks won't be easy for you. I know what's going through your head. Just know that none of this is your fault. I would hate to see the force losing someone like you over this."

She sighed again, digging through the pockets on her jacket and producing a business card, handing it over to Elsa.

"If you ever think about a change in scenery, for whatever reason, the IAB is desperate for good people like yourself. Not to imply that you should change departments, the NYPD needs every capable officer out on the streets in the current shitstorm, but...well, if the going ever gets too tough, if you need an out...give me call."

With that Jane turned around and went after her colleagues, leaving Elsa highly confused an conflicted alone in the room.

* * *

Christmas was a quiet affair for them. They were lounging on the couch on Christmas Eve, Anna sipping on a mug of hot chocolate with Elsa's head in her lap, both of them looking quietly at the shining lights on the small Christmas tree. It was the first time Elsa actually celebrated the holiday in years, and a peculiar feeling overcame her. Despite the whirlstorm of guilt and regret still haunting her mind, she felt at peace. At least for tonight. The whole scene felt so...domestic. And Elsa realized that she had been looking for just that feeling her entire adult life. Safe. Consistent. Loved.

They had exchanged gifts after dinner, both agreeing that it was silly to wait until the morning. They had promised each other not to do anything lavish or expensive, and Elsa had wracked her brain until she had come up with something appropriate. She had been incredibly apprehensive, afraid that her gift wouldn't be enough. But Anna's reaction had simply blown her mind.

She had led a giddy and blindfolded Anna around the apartment, hoping to confuse her before reaching their destination in front of one of the bookshelves. When they had stopped, Anna with her back to the shelf, Elsa had taken off the blindfold and handed her a card which simply read 'turn around'. And so she had done.

On the shelf there was now a framed picture of them both, taken before they had gone to their concert, in a frame clumsily decorated with small seashells that just screamed 'homemade'. But it wasn't the picture itself, it was the position. It sat on the shelf Anna liked to call 'Elsa's past-shelf', where all the mementos of her first girlfriend had gathered dust. Those were still there, but arranged at the sides and back of the shelf, with the picture sitting smack dab in the middle, drawing all the attention.

Anna had been speechless.

"I, uh, I decorated the frame myself." Elsa had explained quietly. "The whole thing means that my past is still a part of me, but doesn't rule my present anymore. You do, now." she had finished lamely, eyes trained on the floor.

Her face had shot up when she had heard Anna sniffling. "Oh my god, I knew it. I'm _so_ sorry Anna, I'll head out first thing tomorrow morning and get you something proper! Please don't be mad."

The redhead had turned around and caught Elsa in a fierce embrace, briefly forgetting the still slightly sore shoulder.

"I love it, sunshine." she had managed to get out between snivels, "You have no idea how much that means to me."

They had retreated to the couch, Anna leaning back into Elsa and admiring the newly-decorated shelf and everything it represented. They had been silent for a few minutes until Anna had sighed, disentangling herself from Elsa's arms and reaching under the couch.

"This is probably completely out of place after your gift, but no turning back now." she had said with a blush as she had handed Elsa a small wrapped present. Tearing off the paper had revealed a stock CD case with a nondescript CD inside, simply 'Elsa' being written on top in Anna's cursive handwriting.

"Put it in the stereo, but come back and turn it on with the remote."

Elsa had done as she was bid, and hit play once she had snuggled into Anna's waiting arms. Soft violin sounds had filled the air, and it had taken Elsa a few moments to recognize the piece. Her head had shot up when she did, wide-eyed. It was the song Julia had composed for her.

"That's...wha-...how did you?!"

"I found the violin case in the bedroom, and it had her name and address in it. I tracked down her parents and explained the situation. They were happy to help and let me dig through her old stuff they still had, and I found the music sheet amongst others in an old box. A friend of mine from school recorded it for me. I hope you like it."

"Like it?" Elsa had replied, tears filling her eyes. "Anna, I can't even say..." She had buried her head in Anna's chest, freely sobbing and mumbling 'thank you' over and over again for the better part of half an hour.

Now they were simply enjoying the piece and quiet, the whole apartment dark aside from the lights on the tree. It wasn't long before Anna failed to hold back a rather large yawn and Elsa chuckled, pushing herself up and pressing a lazy kiss to her lips.

"How about we turn in for the night?" she murmured, clearly tired herself.

Anna merely nodded, letting out another yawn and stretching herself after getting up from the couch. They went through their bedtime routines and quickly fell asleep, snuggled into each other.

* * *

Elsa was startled awake by something soft hitting her face. She sluggishly reached up to remove the cloth covering her head while Anna complained sleepily, realizing it was one of her sweatshirts. She turned on the bedside lamp and saw someone standing in their bedroom. Her blood ran cold when she recognized Neil, pointing a pistol straight at her.

"Didn't expect us to meet again so soon, did you?" he said with a sneer. "Smart move, changing the locks on your door, but you didn't really think that would stop me, right?"

Anna, having woken up from the commotion let out a gasp and froze, wide-eyed. Elsa tried to slowly inch her hand towards the nightstand, where her cell was lying, but he caught it.

"Don't do anything hasty now, sweetheart, we wouldn't want anyone getting _hurt_." he said, training his gun on Anna to drive the point home. "Actually, now that I think of it, that's not a bad idea. Hand over your phones. No funny business!"

Elsa did as she was told, throwing both devices to the foot end of the bed. He quickly snatched them up and flung them to ground, stomping on them a few times for good measure.

"Well, now that that's out of the way, why don't you get dressed, Elsa? We're going on a trip, just the two of us."

His smile made her skin crawl, terror settling into the pit of her stomach. She knew arguing was useless and slowly started to dress herself, eyes never leaving the weapon that was still pointing at Anna, while wracking her brain for some way to take him out.

"You won't get away with this!" Anna hissed, having gotten over her initial shock.

"I wouldn't be so sure, darling." Neil replied with a disgusting smirk. "For example, you can stop hoping that your _inconspicuous_ protective detail will show up to save the day."

Elsa briefly paused in her movements, processing his words.

"Yes, the city of New York will mourn two of it's _best_ police officers come morning. Now hurry up, or it will be two dead cops and the ginger whore sleeping with one!"

"Why are you doing this?" Elsa asked, slowly inching closer to him. She knew it was a long shot, but if she could just get close enough to him she could get the gun out of his hand, and do it properly this time, without catching a bullet. Unfortunately, he caught on.

"Stay back!" he barked, pointing his gun straight at Elsa. "Do you think I'm stupid?! I don't make the same mistake twice!"

She was fully dressed now, except for her shoes, and she knew she was running out of time. But she couldn't see anyway to get out of this, and that was increasingly scaring her.

With his free hand he reached into his coat pocked and pulled out a small plastic bottle. "Drink up." he ordered after throwing it at Elsa. It looked like water, but tasted incredibly bitter.

"What the hell is that stuff?" Elsa asked, scrunching her face in disgust.

"Ground up sleeping pills." Neil replied with a casual shrug, "Courtesy of our dear friend, Captain Sobel. I don't think it will help his case that he provided me with those pills from the evidence room. Them's the breaks, I suppose."

Elsa could already feel how the concoction began affecting her. The thoughts that had been racing at a breakneck pace slowed down, and she started to sway precariously, her sense of balance betraying her. Neil had just been waiting for the first signs to show.

"Very well, now there's only one thing left to do." he said, and, as if in passing, pointed the pistol at Anna again and pulled the trigger.

Neither Elsa nor Anna immediately realized what had happened. Anna's only experience with silenced weapons was what she had seen in movies, and thus she couldn't initially place the muffled sound that reminded her of a car door being slammed shut. Similarly, the pain didn't register in her brain right away. Only when she looked down on herself and saw a rapidly-growing red stain around a small hole in her t-shirt did she feel a sharp tug slightly below her navel that quickly got worse and worse.

Elsa's addled mind had trouble even staying awake, and it took Anna letting out a pained cry and stumbling to the floor for her brain to catch up, the sheer dreadfulness of the scene hitting her full force. She tried dashing toward her girlfriend and doing something, _anything_ to help her, but as soon as she raised her foot to take a step she lost her balance and fell like a stone, out cold before she even hit the ground.

* * *

**hey lovelies. it's saturday again.**

**okay, first off: sorry to end this on a cliffhanger again. i would've avoided it if possible, but it was necessary for the pacing/length of the last two chapters. i hope your beautiful little hearts aren't bleeding too much o.o**

**second: go to youtube and search for 'mozart violin concerto 3', put that on and re-read the christmas part. the rondeau allegro (=third part) is what i had in mind when writing that part. played with just one violin of course**

**third: this chapter is unfortunately un-beta'd due to technical difficulties, but _ComplexStatus_ is still an awesome beta und basically the most amazing human being this side of alpha centauri :3**

**and as always: feedback/suggestions/criticism/death threats are greatly appreciated. send them my way via PM, reviews, or telegraph**

**don't forget to be awesome**


	12. Ten weeks

**TW: _graphic rape scene_ in this chapter. if you wish to skip it, the beginning and end of it are marked by**

* * *

**XXX**

* * *

.

.

.

Elsa groggily woke to a dark room. A vicious headache was pounding away behind her eyes, and she was thankful that there was only a tiny window letting in small rays of sunshine. Until she remembered what had happened before she fell unconscious.

"Anna!"

With a yell she tried to sit up, but a painful yank at her wrists and shoulders prevented her from doing so. She careened her head upwards and, to her utter horror, saw that she was handcuffed to the headboard of a bed. She started shivering and only now realized how cold it was, the flimsy blanket covering her naked skin doing little to warm up her body.

_'Wait, naked? Oh no, no no no!'_

She fiercely tugged at the handcuffs, hoping against hope that she would somehow be able to free herself. She froze when she heard a heavy lock turning to her left. Several neon tubes flickered to life and blinded her briefly, forcing her to screw her eyes shut.

When she opened them again she saw Neil standing beside the bed, holding a tray with food.

"Good morning, love." he said with a serene smile.

She turned her head away, remaining silent.

"A bit cranky, aren't we? You never were a morning person."

He set the tray down on the ground and sat on the bed, gingerly running a hand through her hair. She yanked her head away.

"Don't touch me!" he hissed.

"Now, now, no need to be so touchy."he chuckled, standing up again. "You must be hungry, sleeping almost a day and a half."

He picked up the tray and sat down again, holding a sandwich to her face. "Here. Eat. I don't want you to starve."

She ignored the food, despite how hungry she really was, and glared at him.

"Why do you do this?" she asked, her voice full of venom.

"Why?" he replied dumbly, as if the answer was the most obvious thing in the world. "I _love_ you. You're my everything!"

"Love me?!" she spat, not believing her ears. "Abducting women who look like me and torturing them to death has nothing to do with love, you sick asshole! You've chained me to a bed for crying out loud! You...you shot Anna."

She fought her hardest to keep the tears out of her eyes, but couldn't stop her voice from breaking towards the end. His face immediately darkened.

"Yes, her." he hissed, his face scrunching up. "She didn't deserve you! No one does! No one but me can appreciate how precious, how wonderful you are. And she didn't even have the decency to die!"

A faint glimmer of hope sprouted inside Elsa for the first time since waking up.

"Serves me right I suppose," he continued, "should have put the round in her head instead. But what's done is done. You shouldn't worry too much about her, she's no longer important. You and I, we're the only people on the whole world that matter now."

He didn't pay attention for a short moment and she took the chance, biting down hard on the hand that had strayed too close to her face. He screamed in pain and yanked his hand away, clutching it to his chest and watching her with wide eyes.

"Fuck you!" she spat.

The smile that took over his face threw her off guard. "I would've given you a few days to settle in, we have all the time in the world after all. But who am I to complain if you're so eager?"

* * *

**XXX**

* * *

He stood up and yanked back the blanket, fully exposing her body. Goosebumps erupted all over her skin, but it wasn't from the cold.

She scooted as far to the other edge of the bed as her handcuffs allowed, desperately shifting and crossing her legs in an attempt to somehow cover herself.

"You wouldn't do this if you loved me!" she said, eyes wide in panic and voice an octave higher from fear.

He had already pulled his shirt over his head and was now working on his belt buckle. "You have no idea how much I love you, Elsa. For how long I've loved you. All those girls, they were...nice. But they weren't _you_."

He finally undid the belt and pulled down his pants along with his underwear and got onto the bed, pulling Elsa back into the middle of it. He parted her legs easily despite her best efforts and advanced, looming over her. He bent down and held her chin in one hand, whispering into her ear.

"You will love me too, eventually."

She felt his erection pressing against her thigh and could no longer hold back the tears.

"Please don't do this, please, please, please..."

She tried to struggle, tried to somehow get her knees in front of his body to push him away, but it was of no use.

"Remember this moment, baby." he husked into her ear as he penetrated her.

She cried out in pain and screwed her eyes shut, not wanting to see. She tried her hardest not to feel, but every thrust felt like a hot iron poker searing her insides. It wasn't long before he grunted and came inside her, collapsing on top her and panting heavily.

"I love you." he murmured, kissing her neck, but she didn't register any of it. Her body was completely still, her mind having escaped to a safe place. A place with Anna.

* * *

**XXX  
**

* * *

Elsa lay curled up on the bed, the flimsy blanket wrapped tightly around her, and stared into nothing. She had tried keeping track of time the first few days, but quickly given up. She had been here for weeks, two months at least, probably closer to three. And there was still not even a hint of a rescue, no opportunity to escape. Not that she'd try to escape on her own anyway. Neil had quickly established a few rules, and enforced them with a heavy hand. If she refused to shower or to eat, he'd beat her. If she tried to struggle when he forced himself on her he'd beat her. If she talked back he'd beat her. If she even so much as mentioned Anna he'd beat her. But never in the face. He called it 'tough love'.

No matter what he called it, she quickly stopped doing anything to set him off. She simply acquiesced and didn't move at all when he came to violate her. Which he did every day. Sometimes twice a day. She had shut down, stopped to feel anything at all. She was merely a shell, a body for him to do with as he pleased. Only at night, when she lay on the bed and sleep wouldn't come, did she allow her thoughts to wander. She tried to think of good things, of Anna holding her and telling her everything would be okay, or even just the feeling of the sun on her skin. But it was getting harder every day, and she became afraid that she'd never leave this dingy basement prison alive.

The tiny, grated window slowly became distinguishable in the weak light of a new dawn, and she listened intently for the sound of heavy footsteps descending the stairs. He usually rose early, brought her breakfast and then left her alone again for a few hours. She could hear birds chirping, greeting the new day and mocking her with their cheerfulness.

On some level he did care for her, she supposed. He tried being affectionate, stroking her hair or caressing her cheek, but she never responded to it, never looked him in the eyes. He even left her a few books to kill the time, but she didn't touch them. Nothing he did could ever excuse the horrors he inflicted on her.

This morning, however, there were different sounds. She heard hurried footsteps on the floor above her, and faint running on the outside. It was quiet for a few moments before there was a splintering sound, shouting and several gunshots. She hugged her knees to her chest, hoping that whatever caused the commotion wouldn't leave him in a bad mood, and be rougher with her than usual.

She started shivering when she heard the door open, but a small, cylindrical object was thrown into the room and detonated with a blinding flash and a deafening bang. All she could see was white and her ears rang, and she covered them with her hands and screamed, tears running down her face. Rough hands started shaking her and she was faintly aware of several voices yelling at her, but she shook off the hands, screwed her eyes shut and scooted up to the headboard, trying to make herself as small as possible.

"Get out of here, all of you!" a new voice demanded.

Someone grabbed her arms and gently pried them off her face.

"Elsa, please look at me."

Through the ringing the voice sounded familiar, trustworthy. She slowly opened her eyes, recovering from the flash, and could see a gentle face framed by blonde hair.

"K-Kristoff?" she whispered, terrified that it was just a dream or an elaborate ruse put on by her tormentor. But he didn't look like she remembered him. He'd grown a shaggy beard and looked ten years older, worry-lines etched into his face, as he kneeled beside the bed.

"You're safe now." he said with a watery smile, and all her restraints broke.

She launched herself forward and wrapped her arms around him, wailing into his chest while he softly rocked her back and forth, holding her in a delicate embrace and repeating. "No one's gonna hurt you anymore. You're safe." over and over again.

She didn't know how long they remained like that, everything was kind of a blur. She had somehow gotten upstairs and outside, covered by a heavy blanket, and ended up on a stretcher with EMTs poking and prodding at her and asking questions that made her feel like curling up and shutting out the world. At some point during the whole procedure she noticed how the trees had begun sprouting the first leaves, an air of spring filling the rural area surrounding her. An over-eager officer came up to her, demanding to take her statement, until Kristoff sent him scurrying away with a death glare and a few very stern words.

The stretcher was finally being loaded into the back of an ambulance and Kristoff hopped on, ignoring the protest of an EMT and sat down next to her. Someone had given her a sedative and she could feel herself slipping away, but not before she took his hand and whispered "Thank you." Kristoff merely squeezed her hand and smiled at her sadly before she slipped into unconsciousness.

* * *

She was roused from her sleep by a slight pressure on her hand. Her eyes immediately shot wide-open and she yanked her hand away, crawling to the farthest edge of the bed and hugging her knees to her chest when she didn't recognize the room.

"Elsa! Elsa, it's me!"

She looked to her right and saw a shell-shocked redhead, looking like she'd just kicked her puppy.

"Anna?" she asked tentatively and reached out a trembling hand, running it over her outstretched hand as if to make sure she was real. Only now did it start to sink in. It was over. She was free. Tears were running down her own cheeks before she even realized her eyes had started to water. Anna took a slow, careful step towards her, and when Elsa didn't recoil she rushed to her, enveloping the blonde in a fierce hug and pressing her tightly against her.

Anna had started crying, too, and for a few minutes they simply held each other. Elsa was so overcome with emotion she didn't know what to focus on. The fact that Anna was alive and well, that she hadn't abandoned her, that she was here, right now, and holding on for dear life as if Elsa would simply disappear in a puff of smoke if she ever let go. Safe. She realized she felt truly safe for the first time in months.

But memories and doubts soon began to invade her mind. She gently pushed herself away and turned her head, tears still flowing freely.

"I'm sorry, Anna." she sobbed, "I'm so sorry. I couldn't...he did..."

Anna merely shook her head and advanced again, but Elsa held out her hand. It was too much. She felt guilty. She felt ashamed. She had been raped, over and over again, and she had just let it happen. She could have struggled more. She could have tried to overpower him every time he undid those handcuffs. Hell, he didn't even bother cuffing her after the first two or so weeks. She could have fought back. She could have...she _should_ have done something, anything. Instead, she had been paralyzed by fear and shame, and retreated into her mind instead. She felt like didn't deserve Anna. Like she didn't deserve to be rescued.

Anna seemed to sense her inner turmoil, how she was tearing herself apart. She laid a comforting hand on the blonde's shoulder, trying her hardest to staunch the wave of guilt Elsa felt.

"It's okay, Elsa." she said quietly, cringing at her choice of words when she saw Elsa's pained look. "You didn't do anything wrong."

She saw Elsa opening her mouth to object, but didn't let her talk.

"What he did to you...it's monstrous. Inexcusable. But it's _not_ your fault!"

She could still see the guilt and self-deprecation clear on Elsa's face, swirling in her eyes. Words didn't seem to help.

"Is it okay if I lie down with you?"

Elsa looked at her apprehensively before slowly nodding, and her hesitation, the fear in her eyes, nearly broke Anna's heart.

She shimmied onto the small hospital bed and extended her arm, inviting Elsa in. She slowly came closer and buried her head in the crook of Anna's neck.

"I love you." Anna whispered, and the tears started again, Elsa not caring in the least that she soaked through Anna's shirt. They remained like that for hours, long after her eyes had run dry, her hands desperately fisted into Anna's shirt and unwilling to let go. Anna had shooed away several nurses that had come to check on Elsa. She sighed, knowing she was running out of time before the doctor would start making the rounds, but she didn't feel ready. Elsa needed to know, and she didn't want her to hear from some faceless guy in a white coat who didn't give two shits about her. She took a deep breath.

"Elsa."

The blonde lifted her head, her puffy and bloodshot eyes locking onto Anna's.

"I have to tell you something."

The fear and anxiety immediately contorting Elsa's face made her gut churn with dread, but she had to push through.

"You...you're ten weeks pregnant."

* * *

**i want to preface this A/N by stating that i don't mean any disrespect whatsoever towards rape survivors. what they have to go through is beyond anything i can imagine. elsa's thoughts and behavior in this chapter are based on articles and blogs written by rape survivors, about how and what they felt. they do NOT represent my own thoughts on the matter. no matter ther situation, it is NEVER the victim's fault. NEVER EVER!**

**this chapter, man...the hardest i've written and probably will ever write. i hd to stop every two paragraphs and do something else for a while. it was a struggle. thanks to all the people who read and left reviews, you guys are the reason i didn't stop writing altogether. you are all awesome!**

**another awesome person is my amazing beta _ComplexStatus_, who just continues to amaze me. you are a great beta and a brilliant human being! :)**

**as always, criticism/feedback/opinions are very welcome. leave them via PM, review, or just send me a message in a bottle.**

**quick update: the story now has an amazing cover image by the insanely talented jungie14295 on DeviantArt. the link to the image and her Deviant-Art-profile is on my profile page :)**

**peace out**


	13. Decisions

Elsa was lying on the couch, book open but still unread, the TV droning on in the background. Stacks upon stacks of brown boxes surrounded her. The shelves were empty, as were all her closets, and Anna was busy in the kitchen, storing away pots, cutlery, and dinnerware. It was early April now. In the four weeks since her rescue, she had done a lot of thinking and introspection. Most of it was spent berating herself, ignoring everyone that told her it was _not her fault._ But she had quickly come to the conclusion that she couldn't live in her apartment any longer. It didn't matter that Neil was dead. He still haunted her in her dreams. The place didn't feel safe anymore. Didn't feel like home anymore.

The past month hadn't been easy. Anna was naturally affectionate and showed it through touches, caresses, and kisses. All things Elsa didn't respond to very well. She knew the redhead only wanted to soothe her, to express her love, but she just couldn't help flinch every time she was touched. She could see how it took a toll on Anna. Just another reason to feel ashamed. The weekly visits to a psychiatrist, only endured because of Anna's vehement insistence, didn't really help, either. He had assured her that what she was feeling was how everyone reacted to such a traumatic experience, at least to some extent, and that she simply needed time to come to terms with it. Time and antidepressants.

The doctor had assured her that her particular pills were very safe for expectant mothers, the chance for any birth defects or other related problems next to zero. Which had lead her to a topic she had avoided up to this point. What would she do with the baby? Abortion? Keep it? Give it away after birth? No matter in which direction her thoughts took her, she was faced with overwhelming doubts and indecision. She still had ten weeks if she wanted to get an abortion. But should she?

Anna was mindful of not influencing her decision. They had mostly avoided the topic of 'baby' altogether, but Anna had said right away that she would stay with Elsa and support her no matter what she ended up doing. It was still obvious to Elsa that Anna wanted her to keep the baby, however. She was constantly fussing about her taking it easy, reminding her that she shouldn't eat salmon or soft boiled eggs. It was actually quite endearing, seeing Anna becoming so motherly. She would make a great mother one day. But it only made Elsa feel more guilty for pushing her away.

Entire weeks went by without a single touch, and she could count the number they had kissed on one hand. They still slept in the same bed, but didn't cuddle. Only when Elsa woke up sweating and crying from a particularly bad nightmare did she burrow herself into Anna's side, sobbing until she fell asleep again. Sex was completely out of the question.

"Elsa?"

Anna's voice startled her from her thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"I'm finished in the kitchen." Anna said, standing in the doorway. "The movers will come in about an hour. Should we take down the TV now?"

She considered for a moment. "Nah, let them do that. They should have packed all that stuff by themselves, for what I'm paying them."

They fell silent again, and Anna was standing between kitchen and living room rather awkwardly. Elsa took a deep breath. _'Baby steps.'_

"Come here." she said quietly, sitting up.

Anna looked surprised but quickly complied, carefully sitting down on the other end of the couch. Elsa took another deep breath and shuffled over to her, slowly leaning down and resting her head in Anna's lap. The redhead quickly, out of habit, put her hand on Elsa's shoulder, softly running it up and down her arm, and for once she managed to suppress the flinch. She could almost feel the smile on Anna's face.

"Thank you." she murmured.

"Well, you shouldn't do any heavy lifting or bend down too much, and since we're basically officially moving in together it was kinda obvious that I should do most of the packing" Anna replied, keeping a chipper tone.

"I wasn't...well, yeah, thank you for that, too, obviously, but...I was actually...let me start over again."

She shook her head to clear her thoughts, and to get rid of the blush creeping up her face.

"What I meant was 'Thank you for putting up with me.' I know the past few weeks haven't been easy for you. I...I promise I'll get better soon! I'll go to therapy and take those pills and it will be just like before! We'll be happy and safe, and..."

She trailed off, tears having started to leak out of her eyes. She was suddenly afraid, deathly afraid that Anna would leave her. She had to show her that she would get better. Had to prove it to her! So she sat up and started kissing her, gently. But with every kiss it got more heated, and soon she straddled Anna, ferociously attacking Anna's lips with her own, her hands running up and down the redhead's body, still crying the whole time.

Anna soon pushed her away, however, uncomfortable with this sudden display of affection that still clearly upset Elsa. The blonde resisted, because she _had_ to show her that she still loved her, was somehow worthy of _her_ love, even if she herself didn't believe it. It got to a point where Anna had to roughly shove her off, causing her to almost fall of the couch. After the initial shock the crying intensified, and she curled up into a ball, openly sobbing.

"Elsa..."

"You're going to leave me!" Elsa wailed, "Please don't leave me, please!"

Anna stood up and took Elsa by the shoulders, turning her body towards her.

"Elsa! Look at me!"

The blonde refused to open her eyes, terrified of what she would see. Anna sighed and cupped her cheeks, softly.

"Elsa, I won't leave you. Not now, not ever. You don't have to prove anything to me. I already love you!"

Elsa slowly cracked her eyes open, looking into Ana's striking teal orbs staring intently at her.

"You won't leave?" she whispered.

"I won't!" Anna said with determination, raising her right hand. "Promise on my honor as a ginger!"

That actually a smile out of Elsa, albeit a weak one. No matter, Anna counted it as a victory. A small victory in an uphill battle, but a victory nonetheless.

"But what about the baby?" Elsa suddenly asked.

"What about it?" Anna replied, a little confused.

"What if...what if I get an abortion?"

Anna cupped her cheeks with both hands again. "I told you before, I'll tell you a million times if need be: I will support whatever decision you make."

"But you want me to keep it."

Anna sighed and lowered her head, massaging her temples.

"Yes. Yes, I would prefer if you kept it. But this isn't about what I want, or what anybody else wants, Elsa. This is about what _you_ want. What's good for _you_!"

Elsa closed her eyes, he face scrunched up in worry. "I...I want to keep it, too." she whispered. "But what if it looks like _him_? What if...what if I _hate_ it?"Her last words had been barely audible.

Anna had a pained look on her face. She didn't have a proper reply for that. She knew that, should Elsa carry the baby to term, she probably wouldn't be able to give it away. Even if it _did_ look like him. She slowly, carefully wrapped her arms around Elsa, who returned the embrace and rested her head on Anna's shoulder.

"You'd be a great mom, sunshine. I can feel it." she whispered into her hair. Elsa merely tightened her hold in response.

* * *

"Will you stop fussing, please?" Anna huffed, rather indignantly.

Elsa was pacing up and down the bedroom, clad in her pajamas that were holding on for dear life. At twenty weeks she was starting to show an obvious bump, and people began to notice.

"But...but I really want to know!"

Anna rolled her eyes and pointed to the door. "Then go and look."

She was referring to the large envelope lying on the coffee table in the living room, holding the pictures from the first ultrasound. It had been an awkward affair and the doctor had asked a lot of questions that were uncomfortable for both of them. Anna had taken him aside after a while and explained the situation. To his credit, he had avoided any potentially dangerous questions. Until he had asked "Do you want to know the gender?" Elsa had declined, because if she still wanted to get an abortion, she didn't want to know. It had been a struggle for Anna to even get her to go to the ultrasound in the first place. The doctor understood her decision, but had written it on a small, non-sticky post-it and put it in the envelope, just in case she changed her mind.

"I can't!" Elsa lamented, stopping in her pacing and looking briefly at her before resuming to walk a circle into the hardwood floor. "What if...what if I decide to..."

"Elsaaaa!" Anna whined. "I need to get some sleep. Finals are approaching, and I can't focus on studying if you keep me up all night."

Elsa merely stuck her tongue out in reply. Things had returned to a state that almost resembled normalcy. Elsa was still more distant than before, but hugs and smiles and kisses came easier as time wore on. But Anna didn't delude herself. Two and a half months were nowhere near enough for the mind to come to terms with what Elsa had endured. She was trying to cope, by establishing the comfort of a routine, of small affections. But Anna could see that Elsa's cheerful demeanor was often forced. How she was still suffering beneath the mask of smiles and laughs. But she _was_ making progress, however small. She had stopped checking the locks almost compulsively before they went to bed each night. The nightmares, while still a daily occurrence, were becoming less severe, ever so slowly. She just needed time. Time and love. And Anna was more than willing to give both.

At the moment, however, she simply wanted to turn off the light and sleep, finally.

"Elsa, I'm serious! If you don't get into bed right now I'm sleeping on the couch. Are you even listening?"

Elsa was standing stock-still, wide-eyed and her hands on her belly.

"Elsa? What's wrong?""

"I...I'm not sure." the blonde replied, before she let out an excited gasp. "It kicked!"

The smile taking over Elsa's face was the most genuine, radiant, and heartwarming thing Anna had ever seen. She was heartbroken to see it being quickly replaced by a frown, anxiety and insecurity marring her beautiful face.

"You're right, I'm sorry." she finally said, "We really should get some sleep."

She quickly killed the lights and clambered onto the bed, nestling as far into Anna's side as her baby bump would allow.

"Are you okay?" Anna asked quietly.

"Yeah, I'm fine." she replied. "Just doing some thinking."

They fell quiet and after a while Anna was about to drift off, but Elsa raised her voice again.

"Anna?" she whispered.

"Hmmm?" came the sleepy reply.

"You really meant what you said, right? About sticking with me no matter what I decide?"

Anna was immediately wide-awake.

"Of course, Elsa. I promised it on my honor as a ginger, remember?"

Elsa giggled slightly, before her tone turned serious again. "What do you think of Christopher if it's a boy?"

It took a few moments for Anna to process the comment, but when she did her eyes went as wide as dinner plates.

"You're going to keep it?" she asked, trying to keep her eagerness out of her voice and failing miserably.

"Yes." Elsa replied, relief of having finally made a decision clear in her voice.

"Elsa, that's...I'm...you're going to be a mom!" Anna stammered excitedly.

"No." Elsa said, leaning up give her a quick kiss. "_We_ are going to be moms."

Anna couldn't hold back her tears and hugged Elsa tightly, kissing the top of her head over and over again. After she had calmed down a bit, Elsa sat up with a smile that glowed in the faint moonlight.

"What do you say, mom, wanna take a look at that post-it now?"

**THE END (for real this time)**

* * *

**whoo boy. we actually made it. this is it, ladies and gents. the end of Witness Protection. i'm actually a little teary-eyed right now. but you need not fret, because there is still an epilogue where we all get to meet the child and see a few snippets of heir life as a family over the years. (the first person to guess the gender correctly wins the interwebs). i'll hold off with the big A/N where i go all sentimental on you until the end of the epilogue.  
**

**i will go sentimental, however, on my stupefyingly awesome beta _ComplexStatus._ i've genuinely run out of superlatives to describe her amazing awesomeness, but you should already know by now how brilliant she is. very. you are the rock this fic is built upon**

**as always, any toughts/feedback/criticism/reviews are very welcome, and don't be shy about messaging me. i only bite if you ask nicely :)**

**peace out**


	14. Epilogue

"Mama!" The little girl launched herself into Elsa's outstretched arms, almost knocking her to the ground.

"How was your first day of school, sweetie?" she asked, holding her daughter tightly, stroking her jet-black hair.

The girl untangled herself and grinned at her mother, brown eyes beaming with joy. "It was fun! Our teacher is Mrs. Anderson, and she is so nice and pretty, and we all sat in a circle and told our names and what we like to do." She paused for a moment, faced scrunched up in the most adorable frown. "A boy said that my name is only for old grannies. I don't like him."

Elsa chuckled and mussed the girl's hair. "Meredith is a beautiful name, sweetheart. Don't let anybody else tell you differently." She leaned in, playfully glancing to the sides as if to check nobody was listening. "Do you wanna know a secret?"

Meredith's eyes lit up while she eagerly nodded her adorable little head.

Elsa smiled. "Your grandpa's first name was Meredith. He thought it was only for girls and didn't like it, so he always said his name was Rodney, but that was only his second name. But it fits you much better anyways."

The girl giggled. "Grandpa was a goofy-head."

"Yes he was." the blonde replied while standing up, taking her daughter's hand in her own, leading her towards the car.

Meredith was babbling on and on, recounting the most insignificant details that had caught her eye. When they reached her car her face lit up, as if she had remembered something supremely important.

"Oh, there is this girl, Sarah, and she has two daddies, just like I have two mommies! Did you switch my daddy with her mommy?"

Elsa laughed and gently lifted her daughter into the booster seat, buckling her in. "No I didn't, sweetie. I've been with mommy long before you were born, almost a whole year!"

Brown eyes it up in wonder and Elsa couldn't suppress a giggle, finding it incredibly acute that a year was still such a long time-frame for her child. She got into the driver's seat and put on the seatbelt, ready to turn the key in the ignition when Meredith spoke up again.

"Do I have a daddy somewhere, too?"

The question came completely out of left field, and Elsa wracked her brain for something to say before she sighed and turned around in her seat to face her daughter.

"You did have a daddy once, yes."

"Where is he now?"

Elsa closed her eyes briefly, suppressing flashes of memory threatening to invade her mind.

"Your daddy wasn't a very nice person, and uncle Kristoff made him go away before you were born. But that's okay, because instead you have two mommies who spoil you all the time." she said, forcing a smile to her face and hoping that the answer would satisfy her, for now at least.

Apparently it did, because the girl crossed her arms and huffed. "You never spoil me. Only mommy sneaks me treats when you're not looking."

_'Is that so?'_ Elsa thought, '_I think I'll have a talk with mommy about that.'_

"I will spoil you tonight if you're a good girl and don't distract mama while we're driving home, okay?"

Meredith's eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically, her whole face brimming with excitement.

Elsa turned back and swallowed heavily before turning on the engine and backing out of the parking lot.

* * *

"We're home!" Anna yelled moments after she had shoved open the front door. Meredith was trailing after her, scowling at everything that dared to enter her line of sight. Just a normal day in the life of a sixteen-year-old. Elsa descended the stairs of their small, D.C.-suburb home with a huge smile.

"How was your day, copper head?" she asked, kissing Anna briefly. Meredith rolled her eyes and looked away in disgust. "Did the baby of the house dazzle those old geezers?"

Anna groaned and rolled her eyes in a similar fashion to her daughter just moments earlier, who could be heard snickering from the living room.

"Quiet, you!" Anna called after her, "Or there's no dinner for you tonight."

When she was met with silence she turned her attention to Elsa again, trying to give her best impression of the tough-as-nails-congresswoman-deathglare. But she knew her wife was immune. So after a few moments she put on an adorable pout.

"I'm almost 39, Elsa. In a few years I'll be one of those old geezers."

"But you'll always be my baby." Elsa replied with a smirk, throwing her arms around Anna's neck and kissing that pout off her face.

"Could you guys please stop slobbering all over your faces while the fucking front door is still open?" Meredith called from the kitchen.

"Language!" Anna yelled after breaking the lip-lock. "She got that from you." she whispered reprimandingly before raising her voice again. "And the door is still open because _someone_ apparently has no working hands to close it!"

"Whatever. Just finish smooching already, I'm hungry!"

Dinner was spent in light conversation and Meredith tried her hardest to keep up her rebellious-teenager-act, but couldn't help starting to gush about photo class when asked how school went. They had been assigned a really difficult project that would amount to 25 per cent of their grade, but she already knew what she was going to do.

Anna was busy doing the dishes while Elsa was still sipping on her wine, and Meredith started fidgeting.

"Mama, I have to ask you something."

Elsa smiled. "What's up?"

"Well, I already talked with mom and she said it was okay, but that I should also ask you, too, soooo..." She trailed off, nervously playing with the piercing in her nose. Elsa merely raised an expectant eyebrow.

"Well, okay, the thing is, there's this boy in my English class. He's incredibly sweet and I really really like him, and he asked me out on a dinner-date, so I thought to just ask you if that was okay?"

Elsa's face fell with every word her daughter said, morphing a stony façade. "Absolutely not." she said, with finality in her voice.

Meredith looked crestfallen, before anger took over her features. "What? Why?!"

"I won't let you traipse around with some _boy_ I know nothing about!"

"But I love him!" the girl replied, standing up.

"You're sixteen, Meredith. What do you know about love?" Elsa replied, also getting out of her chair.

"If it was a girl you'd be fine with it." her daughter seethed. "Admit it. You can't see me with a _boy_, just because dad was a little rough with you and-" She didn't get to finish.

Elsa looked just as surprised as her daughter did, because she had never, ever slapped her before. Meredith raised a shaky hand to her smarting cheek, tears filling her eyes.

"I fucking hate you!" she yelled before storming upstairs and slamming her door shut.

* * *

"Don't cry, mama. You'll ruin your make-up."

"I can't help it." Elsa simpered, pressing a handkerchief to her eyes. "My little baby girl is all grown up"

Meredith rolled her eyes and embraced Elsa, mindful of not disturbing either of their dresses or ornate hair-dos.

"Thank you." she whispered, "Thank you for everything you've done for me. I know my teens weren't easy. But you never gave up on me."

Elsa scoffed but smiled. "The understatement of the century, honey. Dragging you out of that tattoo parlor has cost me five years, at least."

Meredith smiled too, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "Go, mama, before you make me ruin my make-up, too. It starts in a few minutes, and you need to find your seats."

Elsa nodded, still bleary-eyed, and hugged her one last time before she left the room. She met Kristoff fidgeting nervously in his suit on her way out.

"Ready for your big day, pretty boy?" she asked.

He looked decidedly unhappy. "Remind me how I got roped into this again?"

Elsa laughed and patted his arm. "Because you never learned to say no to my little baby girl."

"Right." he grumbled, but couldn't hide his smile."You should get going. Anna is patient, but she can endure your mother on her own only for so long."

Elsa smiled and squeezed his arm again before turning and hurrying down the corridor, sitting down in her seat with a huff.

"Everything set?" Anna asked, leaning over.

Elsa nodded, and looked to the front. "Poor Michael." she said, viewing the fidgeting man. "He's more nervous than me."

Anna giggled and looped her arm through Elsa's. They shared a moment before the harp and violin started playing Pachelbel's Canon in D, the cello joining in after a measure. Everybody turned around and there she appeared, radiant in her white dress, easily drawing every pair of eyes in the church, despite being positively tiny next to Kristoff. Elsa was glad to see that Anna ha started sniffling, too. It wouldn't do to be the only one reduced to a crying mess today.

Meredith gave a tiny wave to her mothers as she passed them, before reaching the altar and having eyes only for her soon-to-be husband.

In the end, Elsa thought, Meredith had known plenty about love at sixteen years old. And now, eight years later, she was glad to have been wrong.

* * *

**oh boy. So this it. It's all over and done *wipes a little tear out of his eye***

**i'd like to take this opportunity to thank a few people, first and foremost _ComplexStatus_ who is the most amazing beta and human being on the internet. Without her, this story would never have finished. Thank you, thank you, thank you!**

**I also want to thank you, dear readers for being the best audience I could have hoped for. Always encouraging, providing valid and pointed criticism where needed and just being all-around awesome. Not a single negative, degrading review on this story, and considering the themes it deals with I think that's an incredible achievement. When I began writing this fic I never would have imagined gaining so many followers and favorites, so once again, a big Thank You to everyone who stuck with me and this silly little thing**

**looking back at it, there are quite a few things I probably should have done differently. For example, In the initial outline of the story anna had a lot more going on on her end. I planned for her to start off with a boyfriend and only slowly discover her attraction to elsa, and I wanted to depict how difficult it was for her to come to terms with the shift in her sexuality. In the end I axed those chapters to focus more on the plot, a decision i'm not too happy with in retrospect. It makes their relationship develop almost overnight (which was something a few reviews pointed out), and i'm pretty sure it wouldn't have hurt the plot to have a few introspective chapters focused on our favorite redhead. But them's the breaks I guess, and in the end I think it turned out all right.**

**So, once again, Thank You to every single one of you reading this.**

**Don't forget to be awesome!**

**peace out**


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